I don't feel well : And i don't know... - Anxiety and Depre...

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I don't feel well

Against_the_current profile image

And i don't know whether it's the mental making me bad physically or the physical making me bad mentally. I'm just so scared. I'm not okay both mentally and physically and scared. My doctor is in my home town, i can't go to the ER after the Last time and since i don't have a real sympthom. I feel like a fever but my termometer, which i think is broken, isn't showing high temperature. I'm just trying to rest and take the meds i have here. Not much money here. If it's mental, going back home would make it worse, If physical, i would probably have to go. This desision is making me sick. 2 days ago i told myself i will stop caring and worrying but well there are 2 options- either i failled or my body is so used to stress that it's inventing new one, and my sickness because i have a deep trauma with sickness, to replace the missing worry. Or it's just hot here, i'm stressed from exams and traumatized. Or have a flu. Either way i'm scared and confused, alonedon't know what to do, stressing about my choice, and unwell physically and mentally.

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Against_the_current profile image
Against_the_current
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51 Replies

sooooo kay .....everybody gets that way esp alone....why having a partner nice to have whether in town or the woods....

did u hear taht or was i imagining it or .......ahhh tht happens whenanyoen is alone......not saying ur imagiing things not saying that ....but much easier for people to cope with friend.......we all feel more secure and able to take a deep breath......taking goode care dringthis stess i improant..ur unwinding rom shcool ...lots stress ane unknowns under5ainly ........geting rest and break is good idea.......u have lots supor5 and friends here.........we all been ther.....tough times ull get through......have lots conifidencein u ...

call anytime

Against_the_current profile image
Against_the_current in reply to

Thanks cause i feel like i'm all alone

in reply to Against_the_current

how do i say this.....thats the foundational statement of his group.....we all started that way.......something abour our society...lousy listenrs or something...lots here much wiser....

this is the village .....the circle.....we listen and help each other

no cheifs......

Dragonfly_50 profile image
Dragonfly_50 in reply to

Amen to that.

Kitty-CatP1 profile image
Kitty-CatP1

Mental , stress, makes physical worse! And goes BOTH ways, my dear! I’m going thru, EXACT same AS YOU are! I am sick from stress! From being alone, ! And no dr, to help! Severe depression I was diagnosed with, plus severe anxiety, PTSK and Traumatized! Along came Pandemic, War, INFLATION thats has affected most people, Globally! Hospitals overwhelmed! Idk either, what we can do, which way to turn, but I am trying. To Hold on, so have you tried any relaxing ,calming music, & lay down, ? I am aware relaxing is very difficult for most of us, that feel like us, BUT it’s worth trying when you lay down,anytime! Dep breaths, so,e times helps?

Against_the_current profile image
Against_the_current in reply to Kitty-CatP1

I'm just trying to breathe. I feel like i will fall apart. The world is falling apart. Pandemics, wars, my mental issues. It's too much and it's crashing on me and i scream for help and feel so helpless and alone and like drs can't do anything. Like they do but it's not enough and this hurts

in reply to Against_the_current

we care we worry and then we take care of our selves to take care of others.....first he rescuer has to be healthy strong balanced life....then......we can help others......thats my counsel.....and experine...ur life of course....

i cant stop whats out of my control but i can take are of hose clsoest to me and get ready should anyting go south.....

Against_the_current profile image
Against_the_current in reply to

Yeah. I just have nobody to take care of me rn. I feel so powerless

Dragonfly_50 profile image
Dragonfly_50 in reply to Against_the_current

Same. But Brigs is right.

in reply to Kitty-CatP1

ooooooh boy...u have a herd of elelphant load o ur p;late.......

ten billin grouop hugs from all here........thankfu the re here for u

Lve2dance profile image
Lve2dance in reply to Kitty-CatP1

Yea for me sometimes it's listening to meditative songs.. Deep breathing.. I tried quai gong.. They have 7 minute one it's like Tai chi.. Sometimes I listen to my favorite songs and sing along or dance if possible..

AlexFlorida profile image
AlexFlorida

Ow man! I’m definitely part of this group Kitty-Cat & Real-Me. Ow Know exactly how you feel! I’m on the same boat right now!I’m struggling

Against_the_current profile image
Against_the_current in reply to AlexFlorida

Yeah, i feel Absolutely inadequate. This boat feels like Noah's arc

in reply to Against_the_current

if i were in ur shoes...advice

options

potential plans

goal

recommendations

etc.

AlexFlorida profile image
AlexFlorida

I’m with you Real_Me! I’m 30 minutes away from seeing my psychiatrist. I have no clue what he’s going to tell me and what Meds he’s going to put me on! I’m super scared of continuing to feel as bad as I do and I’m also terrified to feel worst! In other words, if the Meds I take start to make me feel even worst! I’m scared of everything! I’m a 46 year old man with 2 kids and I’m scared of life, I’m scared of feeing sick, I’m scared of dying… I’m a real mess!

Against_the_current profile image
Against_the_current in reply to AlexFlorida

I'm scared too. Dad's your Age and is scared too. I guess we're all scared. Talk to your doc and good luck

AlexFlorida profile image
AlexFlorida in reply to Against_the_current

Thank you. I wish I had a Dad or that my Mom was alive right now

Dragonfly_50 profile image
Dragonfly_50 in reply to AlexFlorida

I’ll send you mine (insert sarcastic laugh or I’ll cry) - they love everyone but me.

in reply to Against_the_current

there are mentors here and at colleges...not saying its easy....any role models? ever built an ins;piration board? hobbies passions intersts?

Against_the_current profile image
Against_the_current in reply to

Firstable than you for your answers. And no, we don't have mentors and no role models. I'm just wandering lost, being a social disaster 😅

FantasyLife profile image
FantasyLife

Hi u r not alone in this feeling I also had this so, I

I just kept my favourite band songs and started singing and dancing and when I stopped suddenly everything was coming back my thoughts like so I just took my book when moving my body and song with a lesser volume tried to study and hum. it was a really slow and dumb thing but atleast I had progress with study and got distracted too.

But u should be really careful tho another time when I tried this I just ended up binging another series rgt before exam and no sleep and nil mind flunked it yet had a great time tho it was so not good.

I don't know if this method will soothe you but doesn't hurt to try , if u can rather have other options to handle stress then u shuld leave this message.

But exercise definitely helps...

FantasyLife profile image
FantasyLife in reply to FantasyLife

But ask this question how important is this exam to you What happens is u don't do or do it well

Why r you stressed out

How can u get pass marks first and second step to 75 and then next step??

Break it down 😜 have fun make jokes or stories on the subject. U can remember easily..

Hope this helps

Against_the_current profile image
Against_the_current in reply to FantasyLife

Hah, thanks, needed this perspective 😄

FantasyLife profile image
FantasyLife in reply to Against_the_current

Sure anytime 😊 for you

Against_the_current profile image
Against_the_current in reply to FantasyLife

Aww, ty 😊

Dragonfly_50 profile image
Dragonfly_50

You are not alone. I know you have a very legitimate feeling but I can tell you that I, as well as many people here, share that feeling also. I feel incredibly alone. You know where my mom lives? 4 houses up the street. We haven’t spoken in 3 years. My two oldest kids live their own adult lives & being military, they have a certain mindset that doesn’t include me. I am pro military. It’s honorable and I’m proud of them but it changed them and one hasn’t spoken to me in 5 years, the other in 1 year. We were so close their entire lives and it pains me greatly. My father lives 3 minutes from me. You know when he last answered a call or had ANY interaction with my two youngest kids? 5 years. I have my best friend who lives close by but she works out of state so her time is very limited. I have my two youngest kids, (teenagers), a dog & 2 cats. I turned 50 recently. I’m divorced (it was a physically & emotionally abusive marriage, I was lucky to get myself & my kids out alive.) I’ve had to restart an entire life at 40. That’s when my health deteriorated drastically. My youngest was dx’d with a genetic disease & I was found to have it as well & that I gave it to her. It’s called Noonan’s syndrome & affects nearly every part of the body. I also nearly died in January of 2021. After months of symptoms that were discounted as “just anxiety” I ended up in the ER & told I had 13 blood clots in my right lung, 5 in my left lung, a DVT, a superficial clot in the same DVT leg, and so many clots floating under my heart they couldn’t even count them all. I was told to “make a plan for my kids future” because it was unlikely I would survive the night. Never have I been so scared in my life. Called my family on the urging of the doctors & my mother said I was on my own & hung up, my father listened and just hung up, my older sons refused to answer their phones. I have stage 4 osteoarthritis & both knees need replaced but I can’t get cleared due to the unprovoked clots. Last year I had 5 stress fractures in my right foot, and a month ago I ended up with something called a Lisfranc fracture and dislocation in my left foot. A week ago k broke my ankle, same foot. I can’t have a cast because of the concerns of clots. I have a medication resistant anxiety & panic disorder, depression unresponsive to a large degree to most meds we’ve tried. I am in constant fear, despite being on blood thinners for life now, that I will die at any moment. So believe me, I understand where you are coming from in every direction. Please don’t feel alone, I know it’s hard, but I get it. I really do & so do most people here. Don’t be afraid to talk we care.

Frankie24 profile image
Frankie24 in reply to Dragonfly_50

Wow ! We all have problems, some much more serious then other’s. I don’t think real_me was looking for a breakdown of your life. Just some understanding from someone and some helpful advice.

Dragonfly_50 profile image
Dragonfly_50 in reply to Frankie24

Wow! I’ve found a lot of people here wanting to hear about other’s circumstances, so they don’t feel so bleak about their own. And also helping or sharing with someone, is that for you to decide? A breakdown of my life?” Here? Really? That’s no ok to you? So sorry I opened my mouth. I will make sure to NEVER do that again. In fact, thank you, I probably won’t ever come back here. In months and months you are the only person to make me feel that way straight out with exact words. Thanks so much. Goodbye.

mauv profile image
mauv in reply to Dragonfly_50

I hope you don’t stop coming to our support group because of one persons harsh comment. There are a lot of nice helpful people in this group. Who understands better then we who have it also. Most of us are good listeners. Give us another chance.

Dragonfly_50 profile image
Dragonfly_50 in reply to mauv

See below? Frankie24 again? And I have not said a word. Even to people like you who came to my defense. Frankie 24 right there AGAIN devaluing me, humiliating me yet again for no reason. This is why I’m definitely leaving now. Even nice people like you can’t stop them..

Frankie24 profile image
Frankie24 in reply to Dragonfly_50

Honestly Dragonfly_50 I am dying and there is nothing that can be done. I am also Bipolar. Pull yourself out of your pity party ! Seriously !! A long laundry list of your problems is really not helpful to anyone.

Dragonfly_50 profile image
Dragonfly_50 in reply to Frankie24

I kept silent and let you shame me twice without provocation or cause. And now you do it again. LEAVE ME ALONE! You’ve done ENOUGH damage to me, more than 25 bullies, isn’t that ENOUGH???

Against_the_current profile image
Against_the_current in reply to Dragonfly_50

Hi, sorry it's been hard for you. Hope you find peace of mind

Against_the_current profile image
Against_the_current in reply to Dragonfly_50

Thanks for letting me know i'm not alone. You aren't too. Love your username

Frankie24 profile image
Frankie24

It is difficult to be alone and facing unknown health situations. As mentioned above try some anxiety relieving exercises and try to get your mind busy with some other hobby’s or activities that you might enjoy. I find journaling helpful as well. I wish you the best !

Against_the_current profile image
Against_the_current in reply to Frankie24

Thanks. I really should resume doing anxiety exercises, i was too lazy these days to do them but it's needed. I really like journaling but i get a bit drifted out writing, maybe getting on track with some meditations🤔

Kamgal5 profile image
Kamgal5

Stress will make you feel unwell. Try to find things to take your mind off of your symptoms and tell yourself “ I’m ok”… as long as you have been checked out medically. Exercise, deep breathing, meditation, yoga, praying, reading, watching a funny movie, etc… whatever brings you peace. It’s time for you to do selfcare and slow your roll. Find your peace. Good luck! You can do this

Against_the_current profile image
Against_the_current in reply to Kamgal5

Thank you! You're right, it's finally time for self-care

Lve2dance profile image
Lve2dance

We are here for you 💋.. I was with someone last night I care about.. Super sweet but I felt the same way you are.. Feel free to message me at any time off the forum.

Against_the_current profile image
Against_the_current in reply to Lve2dance

Thanks, hope you're feeling better now

Lve2dance profile image
Lve2dance in reply to Against_the_current

💋.. Sweet thanks I am.. Every day is also a work in progress.. I have to remind myself not to be hard on myself if I'm not perfect in my happiness all the time.

Against_the_current profile image
Against_the_current in reply to Lve2dance

Same hun, struggling and being hard on myself when all i need is (my) love

Lve2dance profile image
Lve2dance in reply to Against_the_current

I feel the safest emotionally here of any place else.. My work family is cool.. And my therapist.. But I'm blessed to have found all you beautiful people here

Against_the_current profile image
Against_the_current in reply to Lve2dance

Aww, same and glad you do

Lve2dance profile image
Lve2dance in reply to Against_the_current

💋 😘

Tara52 profile image
Tara52

So sorry to hear of your suffering. I have read that fear underlies all our illnesses. We usually fear because we don't feel loved. Well you are loved! Even if our parents were unable to love us properly ( I came from a dysfunctional drunken home also) God's love is always present.🥰Ask God for guidance on what to do. When you feel peace about it you'll know you made the right one. In the meantime I will be praying for a speedy recovery for you.🙏 Hugs!🤗

Against_the_current profile image
Against_the_current in reply to Tara52

Thanks. I feel that, i feel the fear underminging my illnesses and it being fueled by lack of love. Thanks for the reminder

It’s a vicious cycle isn’t it? I feel for you. Hang in there dear.

Against_the_current profile image
Against_the_current in reply to

It is indeed. Trying to. Thanks

Frankie24 profile image
Frankie24

Was thinking of you this morning. I hope you are feeling better !😊

Against_the_current profile image
Against_the_current in reply to Frankie24

Thanks, i am better now

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