Break Up Survival Tips Wanted

[Jpsurf760]

Hi everyone. My girlfriend broke up with me over 2 months ago. I was initially OK mentally because I knew it was coming and knew it might be for the best. But for the past few weeks I have become depressed and obsessed over my ex. It’s almost an all day thing. I would do literally anything to get back with her, but I know it is absolutely over. I tried to reach out and express my feelings multiple times, but I have been blocked on everything.

Can someone please tell me this pain won’t last? What helped you get over it? I am focusing on myself, working out, going on dates, but it doesn’t change the fact that I love her and she is always on my mind. I accept that she’s never coming back, but I keep trying to email her, which of course just pushes her away more. I just want to move on.

[BrainIsFull]

I am sorry that you are going through this! The pain of a breaķ up can be so awful. And I think breakups trigger all sorts of insecurities that make it hard to move forward.

In my experience, no feeling that I have ever had has lasted forever. Every single one of them have passed! That's one thing that can be said about feelings. They come and they go. I guess my suggestion would be to stop fighting it. Try to acknowledge your feelings. Be an observer. Sometimes just dropping the resistance can bring some relief. And observing, naming and acknowledging feelings can allow you to step outside yourself and see things more clearly.

But most importantly, try to be gentle with yourself! 💚

[Midori]

You do need to stop emailing her; or you may be reported for Stalking and Harrassment. This could get you a Police record, which would not be good for future job prospects.

You are obsessing over her, It is important to stop. She has locked the door on you so please do your best to move on. See your Doctor and/or a Therapist for help.

[soundcloud25]

Not sure if this will help, but maybe understanding you are grieving. You should review the 5 stages of grief. Try to get past each stage. Sometimes no communication is the best way to heal. It will be hard and take away until you learn to control your thoughts. I think mediation will help. It's hard and I'm sorry. Just try to take it day by day, when you get a memory, know its okay to be sad and miss her but replace that memory with something new. Something about you and only you.

[SirGrits]

Hey Jp, I'm with soundcloud. This seems like a normal stage of grief. Try and let yourself move through it. Definitely research on the net. It helps to know that it's a process; with me it really helped me let myself go through it and not think something was wrong with me for the feelings I was having.Prayers bro.

[catch_the_music]

Losing a girlfriend hurts. I have been there. We think we found "the one" but it turns out not to be. We get bummed. We can get way too critical of ourselves and feel worthless. The good news is there are a lot of great women out there - and there is one that would love to meet you. Perhaps you can join a singles group. I found some good singles groups at local churches. I was able to learn a lot from the messages they gave to singles. I learned how to "get out from under my circumstances". The group was good at pumping me up with Hope and looking toward future dating relationships. They did a lot of praying too - which really helped. I grew a lot and learned how to be a Blessing to my future wife. Another good resource is a site called Boundless.org. A great place to find really helpful articles. Good luck my friend!