My Mom Doesn't Understand I'm An Introvert Type Of Person

[melvincrews2021]

My mom had a serious talk with me the other day after I was depressed over my online friend leaving me...she just says the usual bs that I shouldn't be upset over a dude online and that I need to go out and talk to people face to face. What really ticks me off is that she doesn't understand how hard that is for me...she claims she understands yet still says the same crap over and over and over again like it's gonna automatically make things better. She claims to be anti-social...yet I see her saying hi to strangers in the store and she is friends with most of her co-workers for Christ sake. She also says that I need to go out and socialize like a "normal person" practically implying that me being alone most of the time in my room makes me not a normal person...she claims she didn't mean it like that yet it sounds exactly like what she meant. It's a shame that my own mom doesn't even recognize her own misunderstanding of me....ugh...this just makes me feel even more depressed...

[Hidden]

I find it hard to talk to people and make friends. I usually bore them or get bullied by them

[melvincrews2021 in reply to Hidden]

So sorry about that..

[Hidden in reply to melvincrews2021]

I would like to meet shy or introvert people like me. I think I would form good relationship as can relate

[melvincrews2021 in reply to Hidden]

Same...but you hardly see them nowadays...

[Hidden in reply to melvincrews2021]

Covid and type of job you do is important- some people are so comfortable making friends with anyone anytime anywhere. My brother being extrovert and always has interesting topics to talk about

[melvincrews2021 in reply to Hidden]

Yeah...

[Hidden in reply to melvincrews2021]

I have haircut, dye my hair, change my appearance to make me approachable and friendly. But to make someone laugh or communicate all your problems to

[hypercat54]

Melvin not being nasty or anything but isn't your mother trying to do to you what you want others to do? You posted before about a friend you gave unsolicited advice too and couldn't understand why he wouldn't take it.

Your mum is doing the same thing to you and you say she doesn't understand. Ok I'm sure she doesn't but now maybe you understand why other people refuse to do what you think is reasonable? Not having a go at you or anything my lovely, just pointing it out.

[b1b1b1]

This reminds me of something Hypercat 54 talked about yesterday. That is, childhood emotional neglect. I suffered from that, with my mother often telling me (among other things) thatI had a poor personality and needed to develop it. If you can find Hypercat54 's post from yesterday, she had some good links. You are a normal person. Some people are more extroverted and others more sensitive and introverted. Is there someone else you can talk to.

[melvincrews2021 in reply to b1b1b1]

Not really...because really no one in my family understands it either and I don't have any friends or anything like that in real life...

[b1b1b1 in reply to melvincrews2021]

I don't know your age, but if you are in college there should be therapists available.

[melvincrews2021 in reply to b1b1b1]

I'm not in college yet I'm still in 11th grade and will become an early graduate and graduate this year in December...

[hypercat54 in reply to b1b1b1]

Yeah my mother called me all sorts of things and probably the nicest one was obnoxious! Mind you she was probably right about that

[b1b1b1]

Your school will have therapists, social workers and other help. Ask for it.

[melvincrews2021 in reply to b1b1b1]

I'm in virtual school because of the dang Covid pandemic...

[Hidden]

Hi there,

Don't let this depress you. First of all, there is nothing wrong with you, you need to know that. When I was young I used to think parents knew it all, little did I know that they realy don't know. I am an adult myself, so I know what I am talking about. Being educated does not mean I know things. I might know what is related to my career but not necessarily life. So does your mom. It is not her fault that she does not know. What I would suggest is that if you feel this frustrates you, ignore her in such matters. Obviously she is social and greeting strangers says it all. You are both different people. One thing I have learnt is that at home I am very different and I embrace my difference because it is not bad however I do not want anyone to try to force me to be like them. I was born like this and will probably die like this. So don't be too angry with your mom but don't pay much attention to what she says regarding your differences. There is nothing wrong meeting people on line and there is nothing wrong meeting people face to face.