people keep saying im ugly. also ive been bullied my whole life. also im adopted ive been in 13 foster homes. i got taken back to my biological family 3 times to see if they would change but they didnt. i also have traumatic brain injury. im missing my bio family. i wished they changed but they didnt. this article is about me. im the one on the left in the white and blue flowery dress.
rudeness: people keep saying im ugly... - Anxiety and Depre...
rudeness
172 Replies
•
The glamour world wants certain things but we are all different and we have different talents for instance I’m good at art but couldn’t read a musical note no musical ability. People should care for us the way we are and lucky to have such people But we have to put up with what we have and try to succeed
• in reply to
i just dont get it they should know what i went through but they dont. they should know how hard my life has been
• in reply to
They want things rosy and probably forget the hardships- try to concentrate on bright future - it is good thing to do though
• in reply to
thats hard because i feel like my bio family doesnt love me . they didnt stop what they were doing to keep me. also i was a drug and alcohol baby
• in reply to
Sometimes as tough love we have to think better for someone - they are going to have easier time with people who can cope
• in reply to
i hope so
Bless you.The people that say your ugly are the ugly ones and that can’t change for them as they are ugly on the inside for saying such horrible things.you are beautiful because you are a nice person.
• in reply toTillymay
awwww thank you are you sure about that😢😭
Tillymay• in reply to
Oh yes I’m sure I would always say the most beautiful person in the world would be the ugliest if they said horrible things to people to make them feel worthless.you don’t need people in your life like that!
• in reply toTillymay
yeah i dont. im sorry if this made anyone cry. i have another post also about a car accident😭😭😭😭😭😭
I’ve heard how ugly I am my whole life. I grew up with attractive people.
Many people tell me that is called haters.
Do you know how many times people told me sowmthing was ugly and and then you see the person dating the guy or girl? Or wearing the dress lol. And. Ugly I though turned out to be in style. My friend would make fun of my style. To find that he style became in fashion after she said that lol.
People feel like shit inside and these people will feel better by hurting you with pain or violence. Ffff. Them.
• in reply to
i dont do to well with bullying because of my past
• in reply to
Pray for the haters. To be removed. And tell yourself everyday that you are loved. And well the looks I’m working on. All we can do is eat well. Exercise. And try and create an image that we like the reflection.
If we all looked the same this world would be so annoying.
Man is made in gods image. Perfect. That means.
• in reply to
yes thats so true
• in reply to
I think that you had a hard life. Being from home to home had a bad effect on me so, it must have you.
It’s hard to love ourselves when other push us away or neglect us.
I learned we are born and die alone. We only have god. That’s all we need and if we can meet some cool people on our journey. Cool.
Those people that make others feel ugly pick up on our energy about our self worth or esteem. F them. I’m done being peoples Matt.
We have to put the foot down. And stand up for ourselves.
If you think you look weird or ugly. You can change some stuff like hair style. Clothes. Exercise. Change diet.
Mostly these people have explained to me we need to self accept ourselves. Inside is what is very important. Our shell protects the inside. Our heart and organs are all inside without the inside we die.
• in reply to
Tracey chairman has a nice song. Called. All that you have is your soul.
• in reply to
i will listen to that song
• in reply to
i tried to do all that but nope they still bully me
• in reply to
At school? Or home?
• in reply to
at school mostly but home also
• in reply to
I guess you are young. Well I’m a tell you. Even when you get older people make fun of others. Being beautiful. I always wanted to be more beautiful. I feel like pretty people are treated better. I notice when I wear heels. And make up and stuff I am treated differently compared to my yoga attire
• in reply to
i am 17 years old
• in reply to
Ya just a baby. Yay. Lots of shity people out there. I know lots of them. You will meet gems. Find the beauty in you.
• in reply to
i try to and then i get forced to vape. also when im older i wont be able to drink because i would get addicted right away to it
• in reply to
Oh no. You don’t need to smoke love. No.
• in reply to
they forced me to and these high schooler who did that to me
• in reply to
That's horrible. Now I feel like the big brother who wants to protect his little sister.
• in reply to
Stay away from them bad people. They are not good people.
Probably because they hurting too.
• in reply to
I hate feeling ugly. I know we shouldn’t compare ourself with others but it’s hard not too.
• in reply to
yeah it is hard
• in reply to
I think you could be an inspirational speaker. Inside find the light. To help you over come the feelings.
You been through hell. You have lots to share and with the world
• in reply to
i dont if i could do that
• in reply to
Do you exercise ? Yoga?
• in reply to
i barely exercise. i do just dance 2021 sometimes
• in reply to
Exercise will make you feel like a million bucks.
• in reply to
how would it do that
• in reply to
When you can. Go on YouTube. Face yoga.
You can see results.
Exercise will change physical look of body. And brain will be much happier. Of course talk to dr. About brain. Do not wanna upset me. Smart brain.
• in reply to
what do you mean upset you. also i cant do yoga because it goes against my religion
• in reply to
You said you have a brain injury. So before exercise make sure doctor says it’s age to exercise. Face yoga can structure your face how you wnat it. It’s like cardio for the face hahaha.
I’m just saying. You don’t like hair change the colour. You don’t like clothes. Get new ones.
You don’t like shape of body exercise and etc.
• in reply to
Make sure your allowed to exercise
• in reply to
what do you mean make sure. i also have autism and adhd
• in reply to
They say before you exercise talk to doctor first.
• in reply to
i wonder why that is
• in reply to
Your almost done school. You are a survivor girl. You will oneday move yourself to a better housing situation.
• in reply to
i hope i can . i also hope i can find the right person for me also
• in reply to
Seven billion people. On earth. You can find someone. Someone foot everyone. You deserve to be happy and have. A good life. Ok.
• in reply to
i have to find a good Christian man
• in reply to
Wait I’m Christian. We are not allowed to do yoga??? Oh a beautiful Christian is in the world for you.
• in reply to
yeah we are not suppose to do yoga.
• in reply to
Oops.
• in reply to
yes i have traumatic brain injury
• in reply to
You’re so brave.
• in reply to
how am i brave
• in reply to
It takes time. You are young still
• in reply to
im not young , im almost a adult
• in reply to
Wish you could find a home first that is safe. And well I’ll be honest I feel like people are bullies at school still even at my age. I’m 37. I have kids that will talk to me like I am stupid because my gramma essay is not as good as theirs.
• in reply to
Just know everything is temporary. I hope you have positive people somewhere around you. Reach out. Try and move and know high school is almost over.
• in reply to
im a senior this year
• in reply to
Yayyyy. You’re almost done and moving on to something better. New experiences. Yay
• in reply to
i hope its new experience
• in reply to
More to life then we see.
• in reply to
i hope it is. i hate my life right now.😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
• in reply to
Do you have a faith.
• in reply to
what do you mean by that
• in reply to
Do you believ in god
• in reply to
yes i believe in God. i got baptized 3 times
• in reply to
People are nasty. And I’m angry. And I have been nasty. I have been treated nasty. It’s because of anger and pain. It’s not even about us. Half the time.
• in reply to
why are you angry is it because of me
• in reply to
Why would I be angry at you ? I do not know you dear. Of course I’m not angry at you.
Hello. Wow, you have been through so much. But you know what, you're still here and you are a survivor. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Don't let what other people say bring you down. Live your life for you.
• in reply to
has everyone seen my other posts
• in reply to
Can I follow you on here? I want to know why you feel the way you do. I have a relative who has the same feelings you have.
• in reply to
ues you can
We all get dealt different hands in life and I’m really sorry you got dealt a bad one. That’s a whole lot to deal with. Life is hard enough for the best of us, who haven’t had the challenges you’ve had. People are cruel and deal with their own insecurities by picking on others.
You can’t choose your relatives, but you can choose who you spend time with. The closest people in my life are not relatives. Your family probably loves you but maybe has too many struggles or their own to support you the way you need.
I really hate bullies and it makes me angry to hear that. If it’s a school situation where you’re being bullied, definitely report them. It’s unacceptable
• in reply toVDC1
i do but they dont do anything. also the person who is bullying me says if you snitch you will get stitches
VDC1• in reply to
If anyone has threatened you then go and report them to the police, then they will get in trouble, but also your school’s principal/teachers will also get in trouble. Collect any evidence, if there’s any online bullying etc. Bullying is not to be ignored
• in reply toVDC1
my school just ignore it and says deal with it
VDC1• in reply to
Stompoutbullying.org ( if you’re in the US)
Check out what they have to say.
• in reply toVDC1
what do they say my school wont care and yes im in the us
• in reply to
i just feel like hate me and i actually cut my wrists and my knuckles before because of this
VDC1• in reply to
Here’s what I suggest you do, write an email to your school’s principal detailing these things. And if they ignore it, you have evidence. Then report it to the school board and police. Then the bully will stop and your principal could even get fired.
• in reply to
Record them on your phone.
• in reply to
i don't have a phone
• in reply to
You need to remove yourself from these people.
• in reply to
There are alternatives to attending a high school that is causing you such uncomfortable feelings. You can find a social worker in your community. An advocate. To help you get situated in a new housing placement. Soon. You will be 18. You have things to look forward to. Moving from these people. And finishing high school. College and university is very different. Of course pwople suck everywhere. But this is your life. You choose what you wnat to do with it. How you respond to people and situations.
people who tend to bully are people masking issues probably bigger than the ones they bully.rise above the ignorance you will emerge far stronger for it.hopefully one day you can re connect with your family.
• in reply tokenster1
i wont be able to. i was a drug and alcohol baby
kenster1• in reply to
hey sorry to hear that face to face meetings with them will bring you more hurt but could you keep writing to them even send them information about rehab and counselling with elder drug users the penny usually drops and many go on to be clean and rebuild lives for themselves the hardest part is accepting they have a problem.
• in reply tokenster1
i sent them a picture book and they didnt send anything back
i also have been in and out of houses since 15 months old and i got adopted at 6 1/2 years old and my biological brother got at 3 years old with me
• in reply to
Trauma informed approach. There is information on this. I think you can get a worker to help you access these treatment programs. You are young you have a good chance to experience a better life then you feel now. And you deserve to be happy. Our past doesn’t need to define us. It makes us stronger. That’s why I say you are brave.
• in reply to
i hope i can get over the hump of missing my bio family
God is your parent. If you don’t have a faith. Know that the universe is your parent. And loves you. All of you. If you put your hair down. You look like the blonde legally blonde actress. What’s to complain about that.
The people around you are probably most definitely traumatized themselves. That’s why they like that. They feel different themselves so they want others to feel different. They feel unloved themselves. So they are unloving and want others to feel unloved.
• in reply to
yes he is and yes im religious . im Christian
these days are hard for me and tomorrow im going to get a sleep study done on me and im super scared, nervous, and anxious.
• in reply to
You need to find a social worker. Or Counsellor. Or an advocate in the community. You need to find good people. There are resources. If you need some help. Pls inbox me main location of city. I will send resources for you.
Do some push-ups. Volunteer. Get a job. After pandemic. Lol. Find passion on something. Push-ups help. They make us stronger.
• in reply to
If you have a belief start praying for the beauty you want.
There is a movie called the secret. It’s on YouTube. It might help.
• in reply to
OK thank you for that. i will look it up
• in reply to
im scared, nervous, and anxious about my sleep study tomorrow
I think ur beautiful 💕and anyone who can’t appreciate how strong and beautiful you are don’t deserve you’re time
Very good post and response.
Yes. And, we all can feel similar emotions. We are humans. We all can connect in one way or another.
So sorry for what you've been through. Keep in mind that often when people say things like that, they often think it about themselves, even if they don't say it out loud. Hang in there. All life has purpose and a reason for existing. It may take some time to discover that purpose, but you'll find it when it's time. Prayers for peace, strength, and loving relationships.
• in reply topam4him
thank you for that pam
kitten;
i'm little late to the party; another bookmark i'm catching up on...
i gotta tell you - i looked at that pic after you said people called you ugly - and BEFORE i knew which 1 was you....
this was my reaction: What TF are they talkin about - there's not an ugly 1 in the whole bunch!! i had noo idea which 1 was you until i read more...
anyone that called you ugly, has their head up their butt. and did so because it is they who feels ugly, and needs to make you feel ugly so they can feel better about themselves.
people that do that - that's the truest ugly of all. and there's alot of people out there with that kind of ugly in their heart and mind.
they feel better when they can poison your mind into thinking like them. don't take their poison.... it's total BULLSPIT.
i've gone back and looked at your picture several times now - and i have a very discriminating, and detailed eye. i can honestly tell you i can't see a darn thing wrong.
you're a very pretty lady. you've endured some really bad, and traumatic events. in addition to looking beautiful - anyone that's been thru what you've gone thru, and can look at a camera and smile like that, has some rock solid... guts. i see your beauty plain as day.
also - that's a pretty dress; i think it suits you nicely!
• in reply to13ga
awww thank you
• in reply to13ga
That's right!! BULLSPIT!!
Everything she just said. Bullies are cowards. They are so afraid of their vulnerabilities being exposed that they seek out vulnerable people and verbally, and many times physically beat them into the ground. They call you what they feel they are inside. They'll never admit it. It's not about you at all, Honey. It's truly all about them.
You are enough just the way you are, right now. You were enough the day you were born. You have everything you need right there inside you. You have more power than you can imagine. You don't need a man. You're a whole person all on your own. Anyone who comes along is just a bonus. You're incredible the way God made you, and you don't have to change anything to be loved by anyone whose worth your time.
No you are not ugly. Everyone is beautiful in their own way. People who say that are very insecure about themselves. My parents use to take in foster kids and when they left they were still brothers and sisters to us. We are a family we stick together. I'm not the greatest looking person but I find the one thing that makes me beautiful to me. Whether it's a talent I have or my goodness in my heart to help people who need help. Anything that will make people take notice that I belong. Looks means nothing. Your heart is what shines thru to make you look beautiful.
13ga• in reply to
sun - really liked your reply...
only wanted to tac on a slight bit...
none of us perfect - we are a sum of the good and the imperfect.
a slight disagreement tho; looks DO matter - especially when there is absolutely nothing else that's attractive. so what am i saying? people that have only ugliness on the inside - have nothing left but looks to judge by.
i'd be dishonest, if i said looks don't matter to me. but i also look at the whole package. if the looks are there, but nothing else is.... i'm not interested. so looks do matter to me on some level - and that means - if i'm being bluntly honest - on some level - i have some shallowness. i think we all do.
all that said - i MAY have some flaws (only 1 tiny 1... 
) - but 1 thing overall can be said about beautiful people - regardless of how much shallow they may have - they ALWAYS try their best to respect others, and to see the beauty wherever they find it.
- and kitten - my shallowness is a bonus to you. now you know i can be shallow about looks - and I STILL think you're beautiful. inside and out.
hmmm... maybe i need to adjust my definition of 'slight bit'.... 
• in reply to13ga
Yeah nobody's perfect. There is nothing wrong with kitten at all. These are just rude people. They are taking advantage of someone they can bully. I had a best friend in school that was bullied. He never retaliated back at them. He was the most wonder person I ever knew until.kitten came along. Now there are 2 wonderful people I know. I know there are more.
13ga• in reply to
i sure as heck there are more than 2!!!!!! but i also fear, you could be right.
🤞🤞🤞
• in reply to13ga
👍
• in reply to
yep
• in reply to13ga
13ga-
1. Looks don't matter to everyone.
2. Your shallowness is not a boon to this 17 year old girl, no matter how much you try to twist it.
3. Here we go again- A young person expressing heartbreaking frustration and you write multiple paragraphs talking about yourself.
Speaking from experience, a grown man telling a 17 year old girl that "looks DO matter" can be very detrimental to her mental well-being. Everything you've written after that statement to try and justify your opinion is gibberish. Please either edit your response to something coherent and less dangerous to the psyche of a young girl, or delete your reply.
13ga• in reply to
CJ -
i only wish you would TRY giving me the benefit of the doubt.
i had a pointed reason for saying what i did.
.
and if you need me to spell it out for you...
i was trying to say - that she WAS beautiful ANY way you look at her.
.
i was being sarcastic, as well as honest. anything i said about me - was pointedly, and purposely intended to increase the impact of what i said to and about kitten.
.
i'm sorry if you don't appreciate my sense of humor, or the manner in which i try to help others.... kitten certainly DID.
she's very nearly an adult, and i treated her like one - with respect, and honesty about people out in the real world.
.if you weren't so busy looking for the negativity in how others may do a crappy job of trying to help - you just MIGHT see that there's some positivity in there!!! or at least - the attempt.
have you given any thought to why it's important for you to find negativity, where there is none in intent???
.
in the very least, you could give me an occasional TY - for at least trying. clearly i don't measure up to your standards - so in the future, might i suggest, when you see '13ga' - just skip ahead, to someone that's as perfect in their positivity and delivery as you are!!
as always, TY for taking the time to tell me how you feel.
• in reply to13ga
"sarcastic" but "honest" in a post about a young girl's looks... Not helpful. Not humorous. Not worth a thank you. And not something that I will just scroll by without addressing, especially when it's geared towards a teenager.
13ga• in reply to
kitten is practically an adult - any may not appreciate being referred to, or implied that she's immature. most ''kids'' do not appreciate, and in todays world grow up a lot faster than most give them credit for.
honestly, i only starting replying to acknowledge i read your reply.
not worth my time and aggravation to continue... we clearly disagree and have different ideas on what and how to help others.
i wasn't asking for a ty (nor would i EVER). i was only was eluding [sarcastically] - that i thought we agreed that each of us was trying to help others, and has good intentions. if we disagree on that as well... it is was it is. i can't, and won't - try to convince you who i am or what i'm about. only you can decide. read all my replies - i think my intentions are clear.
and to be crystal clear- i'm not asking you to read my replies - clearly i'm not worth your time or aggravation. i'm just saying my intentions are laid plain for anyone to see.
sarcasm is built into me - that's MY programming since birth. while i acknowledge it's not always taken well, and try to change - i am but an imperfect human - presumably, just like you.
• in reply to13ga
You literally said "in the very least, you could give me an occasional TY" in your reply to me, and then in the next breath: "i wasn't asking for a ty (nor would i EVER)" So please... unless and until you can keep your story straight, don't lecture or try to 'educate' anyone else. Kthxbye.
13ga• in reply to
OMG, cj - what part of sarcasm don't you get!?
i LITERALLY said i'm sarcastic!!
hasta.
• in reply to13ga
And that is a GREAT example of how your "sarcasm" doesn't translate. So maybe lay off it when commenting about things that are personal or difficult for another person.
13ga• in reply to
CJ; again - i recognize, and agree with you, and i sincerely appreciate you're taking the time to point that out. it's clear you're a caring person - you would not have engaged me for so long otherwise!
and trust me; i am trying... but after a lifetime of being programmed to be this way - i often have mis-steps on my road to recovery.
.
i've read many of your other replies to people, and i genuinely think you are trying to help others... sometimes you're better than others (IMHO). i hope at some point, you might see me in a similar light.
.
as it is - when i post something - i literally - re-read my post a dozen times; trying to pair out unnecessary bla bla; trying to make sure my message is - on point; well said, and clear. there is hardly a post i spend less than 10 min rereading before i hit send.
.
i truly am trying.... if you have any further suggestions on how i can stop reverting to sarcasm - i'm all ears.
you have to understand - it's so ingrained in me, i could read 1k-x and still miss sight of it.
i've tried my best to keep this free of sarcasm... but if any slipped past - i aplogize in advance...
13ga• in reply to
PS:
CJ, it also occurs to me; in sensitivity to kitten, as well as your own feelings on the matter...
.
that we've been having a conv that's moving more about us, and less so kitten; as this is her post.
maybe we should move our conv into a DM, or separate post... i'll leave that decision to you... if you wish to continue...
if you start a post - if you'd mention me in it; so i don't miss it - i'm happy to continue.
• in reply to13ga
everyone can be in my posts
13ga• in reply to
thank you for saying so, kitten. i really appreciate that.
but i also know that Hidden may not like when replies go too far off the original poster's ideas.... and i'm trying to respect her feelings as well.
• in reply to13ga
im sorry to say this but she needs to get used to it
13ga• in reply to
i understand you, kitten.
but we all have our troubles; and we're all not perfect.
and we all should really try harder to understand each other better.
CJ and i have had our differences - but i still respect her.
i know she's trying to be the best person she can be.
and i'm trying to be the best person i can be.
sometimes we both make mistakes...
probably won't be the last time either.... mistakes happen.
we just have to keep trying to do better.
.
and you need to keep up the hope for your brother. keep letting him know - however you can - that you're thinking about him, and that you miss him.
• in reply to
im so confused
• in reply to
Don't even worry about it Faith. This was a side conversation. Hope your brother is doing ok 🙏
• in reply to
no hes not doing better. hes still in the hospital
• in reply to
Oh man 😔 I am so sorry. This must be so tough. I hope he is getting good care at the hospital. Please keep hanging in there 🙏
• in reply to
i will try
• in reply to
i won't even see him for christmas
• in reply to
I'm so sorry hun 😔 I know it's not easy to be away from someone you love during the holidays. I hope that even if you can't see him on Christmas, you'll at least get to see him very soon ❤️
• in reply to
You keep being strong and I'll keep praying for you and your family 🙏❤️
• in reply to
i'm sad because i have a Christmas present for him and i can't even give it to him.😭😭😭😭😭
• in reply to
Honey, it's ok. You can give it to him after Christmas. I know he'll love it just the same as if you gave it to him on Christmas day ❤️
• in reply to
i hope does
• in reply to
He will! You're a wonderful, thoughtful sister 😊
• in reply to
i try to ne
13ga• in reply to
are you able to visit with him? can you let him know you miss him, and are thinking of him?
• in reply to13ga
no i can't visit him or anything. he's already been in the hospital for a week or so now.
13ga• in reply to
wow - i'm so sorry you can't visit him. a week sounds like a long time.
can you write him a letter that a nurse or someone can read to him?
i'd bet he'd really love to hear what you're thinking about!!
.
or maybe you could record what you want to say on a phone, and have someone play it back for him! ??
then he could hear it in your own voice!!
• in reply to13ga
i can't do that either because of covid
13ga• in reply to
you can't even get a letter to a nurse to take in and read to him?
that doesn't seem right - surely there's some way to get a message to him....
have you talked to your parents about doing this? maybe they can help find another way....
• in reply to13ga
i've tried everything and my parents have also. all they say sorry can't take that and all that other stuff
13ga• in reply to
hi kitten - wow - i can't believe there's no way to get a message to him.
that's terrible! i know how incredibly frustrating that is, and how helpless that must make you feel.
.
but you're not alone. everyone that reads your posts is thinking about you, your brother, and your whole family.
i know that many more read your posts than those that reply to you - and i know they're thinking of you and your family too.
.
never give up. don't give up hope. but most importantly - don't give up trying to get a message to him!! keep trying!!
keep calling, or going to the hospital if you can - keep trying. ask your parents to keep trying.
.
kitten - write that message to him in a letter anyway! AND record it on a phone or recorder!! DO BOTH. have them ready to send to him -or to give him when he gets out!!
i know he'll appreciate reading it and listening to it even after he gets out.
and if you keep trying to get them sent to him - maybe - just maybe - someone will come to their senses and take them to him.
.
kitten's to-do list:
write your message down;
record your message;
keep hoping; keep thinking good thoughts;
keep trying to get the messages to him. and don't stop trying until they're taken to him or he gets out, and you hand them to him yourself!!
also - keep reminding yourself - as long as he's in the hospital, he's getting treatment - he and his team of caretakers are working to get him better! and that's a good thing.
You are definitely not ugly, you look beautiful. People tend to say these horrible things because it’s their own insecurities talking. The best thing you can do is rise above it and know you are beautiful. I’m sorry you’re biological family didn’t change, sometimes it might be for the best to not be in that toxic environment. Is your adoptive family caring, looking after you?
• in reply to
yes they are
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