Argument with Fiance

[Uphillyeti]

I had a fight with my fiance last night. I was mad at the world and very annoyed. I was mad because I felt like I would never be a good father. I read about good fathers and how they taught them to do practical things like work on cars or take a punch. My father and I had a very odd relationship. He never had a very hands on approach to teaching me things. Or maybe I just was not a good son. Thats a thought for another day. Anyways, I recenty started a blog too. And its not going anywhere. only three people I know have even looked at it. This hurt me because I felt if I fell off the planet nobody would care. So that night when my fiance came home... I was depressed and irriated and annoyed. I took it out on her in the form of a fight. I said some mean things too which hurt her. This morning we talked and everything was well. But she asked me if I could find a way to tell her when I start feeling like that. Problem is that I do not always know that I am feeling like that untill I am too deep. Then it feels like someone else has the reigns. Anyone else every feel like this? How do you stop yourself from getting so low. Also my fiance things meds might help me. I dont know what to do.

[Blackdog1]

For myself, mindfulness training is helping me to be more sensitive to my mood changes; and when I start to feel myself going down, I take a time out so I don't take it out on people. What do I do? Go exercise, deep breathing and body scans (both mindfulness techniques you can find on youtube) I have been taking classes on it (found through my local hospital) so I can learn it better.

They call it mindfulness "practice" because that's what you do, a little every day, like learning the piano or karate.