Kids freak me out. Like, anyone younger than 10 makes me very very nervous. Whenever I speak to one, I feel as I'm already disappointing them. I'm sweating, thinking of a hundred ways to impress them. (even if it is phone conversation) Jeez! I feel as if they can see through me.
They say kids are pure. To me they seem wise beyond their years and honestly, I get scared.
I wish I had a younger sibling. Perhaps kids would then be easier for me. I just have the knack for talking to kids, really. A friend of mine is so great with kids, so loving and caring. I ask him how he does it. He shrugs and laughs it off. It's a natural thing, he says.
It's a talent, apparently?
(I have a feeling I would make a bad aunt)
Rant over.
Written by
little_cactus
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I think... with any population, if we don’t have a lot of exposure or practice interacting with them, then it makes sense to be uncomfortable and unsure around them.
I’m more that way with people of the opposite gender or anyone in authority over me really or 8th graders. I get frigid and insecure. I’m working on it though. It’s okay to see where you are and where others are and want to grow. We can appreciate the skills and talents of others while developing our own.
For me, I am a big sister. I have 5 younger brother and sisters. I have babysat all my life. I feel like I get kids, I understand what’s important to them, and most of all: I know how to be silly.
So, I’m the girl that asks them what their age is or favorite color or favorite TikTok-er or if they like Billie Eilish or Peppa Pig or if they want this paper airplane I just made them. It helps that I like children’s movies and that my little sisters help me know what’s the trend these days.
But, each kid is different. I’m definitely better with teens or preschoolers. 4th grade to 8th grade kids are scary to me too. I guess I’d talk to them about ROBLOX or TV-shows like Riverdale or if they play sports in school.
Kids are more aware than we give them credit. They can tell if you’re nervous or excited to meet them. Idk. What I do know is this: you can improve. Even if you didn’t have a younger sibling, you can still learn how to be nicer and more authentic to kids to be the great aunt you want to be.
For the most part, think about the adults or teens that you liked as a kid and how they spoke to you. Remember that each kid is just doing their best while growing up with little control over their lives. They’re learning and absorbing and becoming. Be kind. Be supportive. Remember what it was like to yearn for freedom and feel as though one day was built of 500,000 hours. Be imaginative. Kids like would you rather questions... well I think we all like picking out what super power we’d choose.
Anyways, to choose to find the humor in a situation where we feel disappointed of ourselves... you should watch this this video: youtu.be/qsEsgp3H7CU
(SNL clip, “Duolingo For Talking to Kids”)
As long as you care, actually listen when they talk, and give out 20$ bills in cards each Christmas (Lol)... your nieces or nephews will adore you. They will look up to you. They will be better and love better because of you.
having read your reply, i feel i have lots of room for improvement. I think having very few younger younger kids in my neighbourhood and family made me develop a somewhat - not sure how to put it - indifferent attitude towards them. I just don't feel drawn towards them. But i want to change that!
A talent?? It's pure magic!! Haha-just kidding. I've owned a day care center for 15 years. Trust me-it doesn't take much to impress a child. It seems like you think they are looking at you and judging you somehow. -Not the case at all. When a kid talks to you, listen to them-I mean REALLY listen, and ask questions about their story. You will have them won over in no time! Oh-and kids just LOVE silly stuff! The sillier the better. They find everything funny!
Thank you! Shy children-you can't overwhelm them or be too loud. What other kids might like, shy children get uncomfortable with easily sometimes. Talk to them about what interests them. A certain toy, an item of clothing, a book, anything. If you get no answers, just keep talking- but low and gently. NEVER force them to engage in activities with other children. If they want to sit on the sidelines and watch, that's fine. I try to get the other children to interact with them and ask them if they want to play. Sometimes it takes weeks and weeks for a shy child to want to interact. Just leave them be. Rude kids!😣🙄 -Yikes!! We do time-outs. But before they go into time-out, we explain what they did that was not nice, and if it involved another child, they have to apologize. After about 10 minutes, we ask them if they are ready to come out. Depending on what they say, we have them repeat saying what they did and what was wrong about it.. ( the rude kids are usually at least 3 or 4 and can converse with you). The misbehaved younger kids, well-redirect, redirect, redirect. Just tell them no, and get them involved in another activity. Usually it's with not sharing. But it seems like all kids don't like to share! Lol
Just work out what interests them and talk to them about that. Suffer little children to come unto me and forbid them not for of such is the Kingdom of Heaven.
Do you still have any inner child in you? If you do, let that out when you are around kids. That's the best natural way I can put it. Play in the sand box per se with other kids just like you are one of them.
Kids just want attention, to be playful and lighthearted that results in laughter and fun. And afternoon spent playing and helping a child learn pays off for you and them, dont be intimidated, just jump in, be silly and have fun.
What can I say--I don't know how old you are, but if you know who W>C>Fields was (comedian in the '50s, '60--he always said "I like kids-I like them well done"..Hope this at least brought a smile to your face--just give the presentation--you're probably not the best with kids(who is)?, but unless you have a cold heart, most likely certainly not the worst--do your best--and good luck
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At my breaking point.
Why is it so difficult to get help?
What is it to become vulnerable and is it worth it?
Disappointed with myself
How do I get over this?
