Hereditary fear

[Mimiqt]

Hello everyone.

I read somewhere that mental illness is hereditary. What are the odds it won’t get passed down?

My dad never got diagnosed but he survived a suicide attempt when I was young. Conversations with him daily also contains suicidal ideation and excessive fears in almost every word. Plus he has other chronic illnesses.

My eldest brother had a history of drug abuse. My sister has anxiety disorder and I have major depression disorder. Seems like everyone in our family has it.

I fear for marriage now. I mean, getting into relationship is already a tough feat for me. Getting married and fear for future really made me feel undeserving of anyone regardless how i desire some care.

[lillyofthevalley37]

There is no hereditary mental illnesses there maybe just bad attitudes

You sound very concientous and potentially a very good mum and wife

[hypercat54]

There can be a heredity component to mental illness, but it isn't clear how much, or whether it is learned behavior. If in your family you are more likely to learn unhealthy patterns of behaviour than in a mentally sound environment. However through therapy you can learn to change unhealthy behaviours to healthy ones instead.

[Mimiqt in reply to hypercat54]

Any therapy that is helpful to you that u may suggest?

[hypercat54 in reply to Mimiqt]

Talking therapy helped me the most.

[fauxartist]

Who’s to say who ever you marry doesn't have a recessive gene or two, it's always a crap shoot, and unless you can manipulate genes legally, you have to believe that you will love your children and do the best you can for them unconditionally. I believe the majority of society has one thing or another....and that the new normal is abnormal....so living in fear of passing on hereditary predispositions isn't realistic in the long run. Kid’s will be who they are going to be anyways, they don't come with ‘how to’ manuals. And one thing I have learned is, love them, protect them, believe them, and have fun with them. They will be fine.

[Mimiqt in reply to fauxartist]

Thank you. I will keep this in mind. It’s just that growing up, I never realise how not-normal my family is until i get to know other families. I still deal with some scars on my own and never have enough confidence committing to anyone else. I always feel like a burden and fear my not-so-normal family will be a burden on anyone else too.