I believe it is what keeps me depressed, anxious, and stuck. I often find myself dwelling here and lately I am aware of it so much more.
All the thoughts that flood...What if I get sick and die.. What if my husband, mom, siblings, or kiddos get sick and die. Worrying about our fur babes, a dead animal on the road.. a bug that lost its wing.
Its goes on and on... the worry, the fear, then the anxiety and depression. A constant cycle of madness. I obsess with these thought over and over until I can't move. It can be extremely debilitating.
The one constant force in my life and the only thing that can't shift my mindset and turn those thoughts around is my connection to spirit, to my greater power, and to love. When I connect here I am safe. I am free. I can breathe and move again. It is remembering this power that I have the most trouble with. It is right there but sometimes I am so wrapped up in the obsessive thoughts I forget and then I am living in the dark fears for longer than needed.
Todays mantra: The power and protection of spirit and love surround me and fill me.
Can anyone relate?
Much love and many blessings to all.
Written by
Shakti111
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Hello hope you fell well soon thank you for the mantra it is well recieved ! You sound like a person who is learned and certain of your path in life ! It can be hard to break the circle of depression and anxiety but given time it will recover God bless you and hope you recover soon 🙏
Fear can certainly be debilitating. I too seem to have all this open mind space to worry about the little and the big things. I want those little ones to go away. I have a terminal diagnosis that really did help with the little things. My mind is open now in a whole new way. I wish it wasn't due to my physical condition forcing my brain to reprioritize. I also have my higher power and from this, I am not afraid of the next chapter. I am afraid for those left behind like my young kids. I am right there with your mantra today!
Sending you so much love. God be with you on this journey. Your energy and aura are so strong and beautiful. I love your positive attitude and thank you for your kind words. Sending prayer your way.
In general I think we don't talk about fear enough. There can be a number of things people are afraid of and you are right that fear can lead to anxiety (its closest relative) and depression. I am going to try to focus more on what I am afraid of. x
I would say that almost everyone has fear, it's part of the human condition. The problem with people with Anxiety Disorders, and depression is the intensity of the fear is SO great, can take over our thoughts, and "highjack" our lives. As Dr. Claire Weeks says & I am paraphrasing here: We need to bring our fears to Norman intensity. One cannot help to rid themselves of fear (as I've stated it's part of the human condition), but we can learn to bring our fears down to a less, or normal (healthy is a better term, then "normal)! It's NOT easy, I guess that meditation, diag. breathing, medications, hope, prayer, a higher power that we believe in, therapy, etc. can all help.
It's new to me. For most of my life I felt like I was born without fear. Fear evolved in humans to protect us. Without it we would have become dinner and became extinct as a species. I have always felt so different among others when confronted with situations involving danger. They would become paralyzed while I would just step to the edge and leap.
That all changed about three months ago. My wife suffered a major stroke and almost died. Standing next to her bed in the ICU I experienced fear as never before. This is not necessarily uncommon in such a situation. However, it has now become a permanent resident in my mind and choices.
I now find myself mentally paralyzed with fear. It controls all my thoughts. I am unable to move forward. I no longer recognize the person I see in the mirror. The thought of losing the most important person in my life is unbearable. It has caused me to fall into a state of depression, a deep well that I cannot climb out of.
Instead of engaging in the daily activities I love so dearly, I am instead lured into distractors. On their own, the distractors aren't harmful. Over time the destruction will be from ignoring the daily rigors and chores that are what give life its meaning.
I own a Construction Company and fill the role of Project Manager, which requires that I travel...a lot. My Company makes millions in revenue. I am the negotiator for all these contracts. Yet, I find myself afraid to leave my house now.
What if I am on the road and she dies? This is a thought which I cannot come to terms with. No matter how I try, I find myself paralyzed.
So, to answer your question; yes, I can relate to your fear.
I have no insight to offer. I fell into this well recently. I have everything I could want at this stage in my life. Three months ago, it all became meaningless. The light at the end of the tunnel went out and I found myself unable to see any paths in front of me.
I am glad that you have found a coping method for your fear. I am still searching.
To some extent your fear is appropriate as you are facing a very difficult situation. Is your wife expected to recover? Having a long talk with her doctors might help allay some of your fears. When someone close to you is seriously ill, however, it is not really possible to carry on as though everything is normal. It is understandable that you don't want to travel right now. I think you have to bend to the changed circumstances in your life right now. xx
Thank you so much for sharing. I feel for you so very much and can relate. My mother had a major heart attack a little over a year ago and she is still dealing with the aftermath. Fear of having another one and dealing with the consequences is always present for her. So its very present in my life as well. I guess the most pro active thing we can do is just trust that we will be ok as will our loved ones. If not the stress from the worrisome thoughts will make things much worse. I wish I had more to share... I am still searching as well.
Much love to you and your wife!!
Can I ever! You're right; it IS debilitating! And it's incredibly easy to get caught up in the fear.
In August my husband was hospitalized with kidney failure (and 55 other diagnoses). The fragility of his life slammed me in the gut. I was sure he was going to die. The months following were torture. It was a trauma im still not over.
I try to come to grips with the idea that he may die. But also could I.
I needed therapy to help me deal with our new reality. And I’m learning to live with it a day at a time.
Life is precious and needs to be celebrated daily.
Thinking of you Lily. Thank you for sharing. Sometimes I think our trauma is here to stay and our work is to just find the tools to manage it. I have been in therapy for years for my trauma as well. One day and one breath at a time.
You are so right life is precious. we must live it fully and celebrate daily.
My prayers are with you. Im not religious but without a belief in a Universal Spirit, I couldn’t handle any of this. Nor could I do it without support. Thank you for thinking of me.
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