Not addicted to anything else because the addition of fear makes sure you don’t get addicted to something else. It wants you all to itself. I believe that the underlying cause of all my mental ills is fear. Fear always gets you to question your abilities, feelings, people and what is true and false. It tries to protect you from getting hurt but, ironically it keeps you from trying and creates doubt which causes more pain.
I’ve not taken a lot of chances in life and risked enough all do to fear. It’s made me question to many things that I shouldn’t question and has recked havoc over my entire life.
I understand that some fear is healthy and keeps us from getting injured or killed but, when it runs amok it destroys everything for me. Everyone has a fear whether it be snakes, flying in an airplane, open spaces or even bridges and avoidance can work for a lot of people esp if it’s iust one fear. Unfortunately for me fear is hanging on to me every moment and I just can’t break the pattern of its desrucable path. I fear losing my house, losing my job, losing a loved one, losing my mind, losing my train of thought, losing track of time, losing in life! Well I feel that I have already lost my life and I’m just trying to figure out how to get it back? I’m 45 and don’t have a career, I don’t have a friend I can talk to when I need a friend. I don’t have a 401k and I don’t read well and my working and short term memory are awful. I don’t plan things well and most of the time my mind is working against me and not for me, which I will never understand. I’m very unorganized and I have no goals for the future except trying to free myself from this living hell. I don’t even have a daily routine but, even when I did and I had money I was still miserable and not content. Has anyone been able to tone down their fear so they can get clarity?