I feel like a waste of breath.

[No1wthayla]

I blew up at my daughter for making food for herself and not asking if I wanted any. She pointed out that I did the same. After getting really mad, slamming my bedroom door. I put on shoes grabbed my keys and went for a drive. I apologized to her but she didn’t offer any real comfort about my feelings. No offer to cook dinner twice a week. No offer to help me feel better. Am I being selfish for wanting that? She’s 26 and not working now for obvious reasons. She can get unemployment but hasn’t filed yet cause her dumb boss said he would. That was 2 weeks ago.

I feel I’m being taken advantage of and she doesn’t appreciate me. She has her own bedroom but sleeps on our couch so she doesn’t have to move her electronics back and forth. Why have two bedrooms if she’s not going to use it?

What do I do? I’m hungry but so mad that I hurt her feelings that I can’t eat right now.

[Mary-intussuception]

Some relationships are going to be strained right now.

Other folk are having to stay away from loved ones - and they're suffering loneliness.

Others are receiving news that loved ones have the virus.

[Dolphin14]

Set some boundaries. Tell her to keep her electronics in her bedroom.

Share house responsibilities such as cooking. Don't make this optional make it an expectation.

Everyone needs to work together right now. She's an adult not a child.

Best of luck and stay safe

[hypercat54]

It's your house so you lay down the house rules, not her. Decide what things you want to change then have a calm talk with her. Remind her that if she doesn't like it then she is free to get her own place where she can do as she pleases.

[lovetodance2018]

Thanks for sharing this. Having an adult child living at home is really hard, especially during these trying times. We all need to have empathy for one another. However, it is your home and it important you all come up with a good system that will work for all of you, especially since you don't know how long this unusual time in the world is going to go on for.

More often than not people don't really think of others when they are making a meal for themselves.

So why don't you sit down with your daughter and have a heart to heart. Maybe take turns deciding who's turn it is to make food. Or you might decide everyone just gets their own. It is best to figure out what works in your family. One friend of mind who has three adult daughters at home right now decided that everyone do their own breakfast and lunch and then dinner they will take turns.

As for the bedroom situation, since you are sharing the house, it may be best if she already moves her electronics to the second bedroom, so everyone can have access to the couch and living room.

Last year we were living with our daughter for 17 months and we had to all decide on some ground rules to make it work. It took some trials until we all agreed on something that was doable.

Here is an article you might find helpful - bit.ly/2UUv6Nl.

I will be praying for you. I know these are trying times, but it is so important to look at the blessings and not is what is going wrong right now in the world and in our lives. Hugs!

[BeesRCool]

You're not being selfish. She's old enough to act like an adult. She needs to do so. Her lack of a paying job does not negate that you are not her maid or her chef. You are her mother. The worries of the entire world are not yours to bare. Yes, we are all going through actual hell right now. But we do not take that out on those we love. I have 3 other adults living with me right now. We had some issues at first and then remembered we're all adults, we're all scared, none of us can get to our kids or loved ones...in short, we are in this together for good or bad. Now things are really good and we can lean on each other when needed. I just found out my sister in Alabama is being tested. I'm in Texas. My sister-in-law and father-in-law are being tested and they live 20 minutes outside of New Orleans. Have I taken that bad news out on those around me? No. Has my spouse taken it out of me? No.

I had a full blown meltdown 2 nights ago. I had just talked to my daughter, aged 27 and lives only an hours drive from me, on an app called Marco Polo. She is alive and well and doing fine. But when we ended out chat time I started shaking and crying. I mean soul crushing crying. I'm not a crier. At least I didn't used to be. I hate being touched when I'm upset but all three of them just held me and, for one in my life, I let them. I just kept saying " I just want to hold her and touch her face and breathe in her hair and..." and my roommate, who has twins, 2 year old boys, in Arizona right now and he joined me in my tears and gave me understanding because he also just wants to hold his babies and breathe them in.

That is what we all need right now. Understanding. We are all going to have upsets with those we live with. All of us will reach levels of frustration, fear, anger, loneliness,... you name it... and it's going to come out sideways at those around us. We just have to get through it. Talk to each other. Support and comfort each other even when we may not really feel like it. I'm clear headed right now and can say these things but who knows what I'll be like in 5 minutes or 5 hours or 5 weeks. Who knows anything at this point.

Still, it does not give anyone the right to treat you the way your daughter did. Or..honestly..you her. You both could have handled it better but so what? We all screw up and handle things poorly. It is her choice to hold on to that garbage or let it go and just be a family. Do things right. Make choices that take each other into consideration and go above and beyond, not because you have to but because you love each other and want to.

Long but that's just my opinion.