Hi, I'm new here, my mom told me to check out this site to "meet people who feel the same" as me, so we'll see how long I keep this for.
I struggle with my depression daily, one of my biggest problems is missing work, I just can't get myself out of bed unless I schedule it myself, and even doing that is a toll.
Sometimes I wish my car was paid of so I could just pack some things in it and leave/just live there, almost anywhere would be better than this town and my parents house.
Hello Alice. Welcome to the forum. I am sorry you are suffering with depression. It is great you have joined this forum to get support and meant fellow sufferers.
I understand how you feel. A little over 2 years ago I packed my bags and moved out of state where I know noone except some family members. I’m miserable here too. Just from my experience, moving didn’t help at all. In my case it only added more stress and made my symptoms worse. But I do totally understand how you are feeling. This is just what I experieced.
Thanks for sharing your experience, it sheds some light on what I want to do. Running has just always seemed like the best option, this town and it's community has never treated me well.
Hi Alice,
Nice to meet you 
I don't know how old you are but I can tell you that I've struggled with depression, and anxiety my whole life, and as a younger person I was bipolar as well. I can vouch for the fact that as a young person depression sucks bigger time than most, at least from my point of view. Just a lovely little bunch of mental issues that liked to play rounds of sports with negative thoughts in my head. It's been like "Hey! Let's say we kick around the idea of her being a complete loser today shall we?!" And before you know it...score! I'd replay sh*t that went on that day or that week or even that hour, over and over in my head and kept feeling that rock in the pit of my stomach. That awful gut feeling would color my view on anything else. I'm a runner too, I loved (and still love) the idea of being Cher in the movie Mermaids, where she just chooses a point on the map and they go! If you've ever seen it, the running doesn't help in the end, but for the mom it was the way she coped with junk. I'm kinda in a bad way to go now in my living situation, but, I can't leave here right now. So I let myself feel the depressed side of it when it wants to come, only because it gets worse if you try and fight it. And, I remind myself that this sh*t is only temporary, and I allow myself to feel good about other stuff like, maybe helping an old lady across the street, buying someone's coffee, or getting a good grade, or even just a passing one, or painting a smile on a rock and leaving it for someone to find because sister, we are not alone. There are more of us out there than you can shake a stick at, and the best thing is you're here in this community you are heard, and supported. So, chin up babygirl, you're going to be ok. With Love Always...AU
Thank you for sharing some of your story with me, it really means a lot to hear I'm not alone in this feeling. I'm 21 and struggled with depression+anxiety since I was about 13, I thought it would be easier getting older but sh*t just gets worse🙃 I need to bring myself to appreciate the little things, or try to spark some in other people, but I've never in any way been an optimist and it's hard. I know I can't run from my demons, I just hate how they seem to always be in my face here.
I get it Alice. I've been where you are now, and I totally understand the demon thing. Actually, I've known the demon more year's than how old you are. It's been many years, BUT you know what I realized just recently? They're fk'n pests. Just look at them like a freakin pest, but the key is you have to look at them. These things that manifest themselves as your demons. Those are things you don't want to face and it takes courage. So, let's say this fkn piece of crap demon was going after someone you loved. What would you do then? Would you stand up to the a**h*le and give it all you had to cut those bastards down? Bring those fkr's out to the light. Talk about them cause they hate that. Share with us here because we know those suckers, and we are here to back you up. We are here to support you and hear you out without judgment, and when you do that, you'll join us to fight for others. There is strength in numbers dear girl. Alone you are one, together we are many.
Always With Love...AU
I'm so happy you're here! The getting up in the morning issue really resonates with me! Is there any way of changing your work schedule? Are you seeing a therapist for your depression? If not, it may be a good time to start. Sending good karma your way Alice!
Thank you for your karma🧡 There really is no way around my schedule which is always hard. I just don't want to go to therapy, at least not now. All my therapy visits have been forced via my parents, and it never helps because I'm just not ready.
I totally understand sweetie. I hope that the support you receive here will be helpful!
Welcome! So glad you are here! Sorry you are feeling so low. Your post reminded me of two books which helped me. You might want to check out Purpose Driven Life. bit.ly/2Y1I8XL and Anxious for Nothing by Max Lucado. Both helped me when I was in the "pit". Hoping they will help you. Blessings to you today, friend!
I absolutely love to read, I'll definitely be checking them out. Thank you
Welcome. When my hubs dies I’m dying my hair pink and living in an RV. I’m going to drive my kids crazy as payback. I might even learn to smoke and call people ‘doll’ in a raspy voice.
Why not? Do it. Get that car paid off and find something that makes you get out of bed. I love my career. You should find something that brings you satisfaction. Don’t waste your time. My best friend travels around dipping/making candles at festivals. Neither of us have worked a day in our life.
Take care of yourself
Doaty💛
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