Still anxious ..hopeless

[Kevin160]

I tried almost everything , breathing techniques , acceptance, meditation , podcasts, books , positive talk self talk , healing crystals , diet changes , baths ...everything i can , because i couldnt get therapy ..im just having terrible anxoety not fear, i dont feel scared , i just feel that anxiety is always there without feeling fear, the heart palpitations , the sickness, the physical symptoms and the discomfort , my heart physically hurts , and i just feel im going downhil, i reached a good place where i would go weeks with no anxiety , now its back almost to where i was before, and i just dont know what to do , i get these heart palpitations for no reason , anything scares me now , like thinking about life, i feel i made no progress eventhough i did , i just hate that nothing is going well , and that im just always oversensitized, this sucks, i dont care about anything anymore

[Amz1987]

Have you tried medication? The feeling it’s suffocating isn’t it, like you want to come up for a full breath of air but you can’t.

[Kevin160 in reply to Amz1987]

I was reluctant to try meds because i was worried they may not work or the side affects,i was also scared to feel more and more hopeless if that didnt work ..

[Amz1987 in reply to Kevin160]

I can relate to that, I have been prescribed lexapro and it’s sitting in my cupboard not started yet. I want to feel normal again but scared of messing with medications.

[Headspace2014]

This post really got to me. There is so much there that sounds just like my trip. I just wanted to reply to say, "I get it." I don't have a ton of answers for you; I'm still wrestling with the same stuff you are. I just hoped that knowing that there is someone out there who knows EXACTLY what you're talking about helps.

There's a saying in another recovery fellowship that is told to newcomers (not that you are) who probably don't really want to be there that says, "stick around long enough and you'll hear YOUR story." That's what this feels like to me. Keep telling it. Lots of people need to hear it.

I think that Amz1987 might have a good question. Medication--the right one, anyway--could really help. It did me. Ask your doctor; they should know what you're going through anyway. And while you're asking, mention the heart palpitations. Just spitballing, but they may just be PVC's, premature ventricular contractions. I get them. They're scary and feel like crap, but are not actually all that worrisome. Wait, that's not right. They are worrisome and feel gross, but I've been told numerous times by a great physician that they are not what you're probably thinking and to ride it out or just do a little exercise to get the heart's need to beat faster in line with your energy level.

Hang tough. Thanks for the help.

[Kevin160 in reply to Headspace2014]

I appreciate the support, and i do find it helpful to know im not alone , its just im still 18 , and i was reluctant to take any meds or start theraoy, mostly because im worried if they didnt work , i will feel hopeless and nothing will ever work , im just not sure what to do , i was doing extremely well for the past few months , i was calm for weeks and would get mild anxiety attacks every now and then , but since last month and it has been getting worse , mostly because of my exam results , and the wait , but even after they came out i was still feeling the heart palpitations , and the nausea and just all those terrible feeling that are becoming more and more constant overtime

[Jen456]

Hi Kevin. Are you back in school now? Could that be a trigger?

[Kevin160 in reply to Jen456]

No thats not a trigger because im still free, but my exam results went up a couple weeks ago and i was busy a bit , im not sure whats the trigger but eventhough i dont have anything to worry about im extremely anxious

[peterjef]

The best thing would have to be a hatha yoga with meditation and some counselling around you anxiety and learning not to fear the anxiety. Try the paradoxical intention technique where you let yourself experience the anxiety and let it happen - good luck