Stuck

[Shalalea]

I have never posted in a forum, or been to the Dr for anxiety or depression. I’m in my 40’s full time job, 2 kids, husband. Lately, I obsess about all of the things that need to get done and tell myself in the morning I will get up and seize the day. But in the morning I just distract myself online and sit and stay in my head. I can’t get past that. It is so difficult to get up, take a shower, clean the house, go to work or go run errands. Is this normal? At what point do I need help? Growing up my mother was depressed but I have always prided myself on being able to bounce back on my own. I’m not doing a great job of “bouncing back on my own”. I am scared of meds, scared of side effects, scared of dependency, scared of labels. I don’t know where to start.

[Hidden]

Are you addicted to being online?

[Shalalea in reply to Hidden]

I don’t think so. It’s just easier than finding the drive to get up and do the things that used make me happy. It all seems like too much, it’s like my anxiety is spiraling and I just looking for constant distraction. Really lacking the energy to get up and do things.

[Hidden in reply to Shalalea]

Why don't you try doing one little thing per day, nothing to energetic then build on it.

[Ragdoll15 in reply to Shalalea]

Yes, I agree that you should see your doctor to rule out anything physical. You could be lacking in certain vitamins or have a thyroid problem as sometimes this would cause you to feel depressed. Good luck!

[good_and_bad]

Hi, like a lot of people I find that the mere act of going outside is very helpful in this situation. I very much recognize myself in what you are going through, what usually works for me is to give myself a reason to go out to start my day (usually going out for coffee near me) when I come back I'll be more eager to do whatever I need to do. Of course most days I still struggle to actually get out of bed and get moving, what helps is turning off any sort of distraction in the house and count to three before doing anything (get up, take a shower, get dressed...). Also, while it definetly isn't for everyone I've had great results with marijuana, either in flower form, capsules or oils. I put 0.5ml of CBD oil under my tongue every morning + antidepressants and I have to say in my case cannabis has way less side effects, isn't as addictive and has more of a mellow feeling that makes me feel normal instead of drugged. I would suggest going to a doctor and getting some information about treatment options so you can at least think about it propperly.

Hope this helps. Good luck!

[Magicdreamer]

This is completely my perspective and experience.... As a single Mom with 2 I had copious amounts of 'things' I needed to do in a day that I was so overwhelmed with exhaustion at the end of each day that I neglected myself and those I loved but the truth that I've discovered from this is that I was so busy trying to get approval from others and meet everyone else's needs that nobody was driving my bus.... It was on autopilot. You need to take time out for yourself and caretake your own needs be that a spa treatment or whatever..... and ask your husband to watch the kids for an hour or 2 but you need to force yourself to take time out for yourself. You matter and I know it's difficukt when so many family members rely on you to do things but maybe share chores and trust that your family can handle them.... You need to meet your needs first... A really good analogy is when you're on a plane and they're teaching you about using the mask I'm an emergency and hiw to place it over your face first so you can breathe and not pass out.... This is a perfect example as you can't caretaker others unless you're sorted first. I hope this helps you see from a different perspective... Looking after your needs first sometimes is selfish and that's not a bad thing. Xx

[Jeff1943]

I'm no shrink but it sounds more like anxiety than depression: you are overwhelmed by the number of tasks that need sorting each day.

This is an illusion of high anxiety: every job seems ten times more formidable than it is and if you've more than three things that need your attention then things start spinning out of control. When in fact all these jobs are really no big deal and you complete them without problems and multiple jobs/chores all get finished fine.

What's more, whilst feeling overwhelmed by our daily tasks we really know deep down that we can complete them no sweat.

Of course, we're only too willing to be distracted whilst doing jobs we don't like but for the sake of peace of mind it's best to get them over with so we can relax.

If anxiety or depression become a problem you should see your doctor: this is the 21st century and there are lots of proven options including talking therapy and medications.

If anxiety or depression become overwhelming and you need respite then don't make the mistake of turning your back on meds. They don't contain arsenic but 21st century ingredients that really help and they've been thoroughly tested. Any side effects become less and less as your body adapts to them.

Anxiety and depression can be cured but you need to do so through your primary care doctor who knows more about these problems than you can imagine.

[Shalalea]

Thank you all for your replies. I am very grateful for the time you took to respond. I do think that all of the suggestions: unplugging from tech, getting out, taking time to care for myself, and talking to my Dr. are wonderful ideas. It feels good just to have some feedback and not feel so alone in my head. Thank you! 💕