Feeling so stuck please help

[blue1764]

I was constantly on this website about a year ago and then I started to feel more centered and like myself so I stopped. Now I’m back and I feel like dying. I’ve gained a bunch of weight and completed ruined my self esteem. I can’t seem to keep a job if my life depended on it because I just can’t get myself to show up. I’m still living with my mom who is super abusive by the way. I have little to no money and no motivation. I can’t get myself to do anything anymore. I’m only 18 and I know I don’t have that many responsibilities yet but I can’t even do the bare minimum anymore. I really do feel like ending it all. I’ve been looking into some inpatient programs in my area but they are all thousands of dollars and my mom won’t pay for it. I feel super stuck super sad super depressed. I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m hoping some of you can give me some insight on what i should do because I’m out of options. Thanks :/

[usernema4]

you are never alone. i am young and can’t help you with everything but i do work for non profit organizations and i think you should try looking into some around you. there’s thousands of people who want to help with zero cost so i hope there is someone near you that can help you grow into positivity and happiness. i hope the best for you and no matter what you think you are important and loved. i hope that helps

[blue1764 in reply to usernema4]

Thank you I appreciate your response 💓

[Okidoke]

Listen, I know it seems bad, probably worse than when you were here last time, but trust me when I say it will get better if you just give it a chance. Remember when it helped last time and you got to feeling better, to a point where you thought there was no need for your support system? Yep, been there. I've gained tons of weight when I fell, lost control of finances and put in the work ethic of a three year old. You can turn all of those around, but they seem overwhelming I'm sure, so I understand. So, let's start tomorrow with a new plan. You did enough to reach out and post here, so now we just need to stick together and gain a little traction.

This time, you'll stick with this place, go get yourself some help, and work your way back on top of it. When you do, you'll have another piece of information: it's a sickness and you have to keep on top of it, dont forget to do and participate in things that get you better, keep them in your life and know they'll help you when you are good and when you take a step back.

For now, take a lot of deep breaths, relax your face and mind, and know that you can do one thing at a time. When that first thing is done, start the next thing that will help you. Start they day with water and vitamins. Start hydrating, step one.

How about calling a counselor? If you don't think that's enough, and you can't get up the strength to start a plan to make it back, go straight to the hospital and tell them what's going on and that you need help. Exhausted. Just don't give up, we can get this turned around. Keep replying, tell us more about what getting your life back looks like to you? What has to be accomplished?

[Sprinkle1]

Hello I agree with okidoke, you need a plan. One thing to do is start a journal, write down your thoughts and feelings, then make your list so you can attack it one thing at a time, do not let the list overwhelm you, enjoy with pleasure when you can cross one off. You are stronger than you realize. I would seek out a therapist where you would be free to talk and get some useful reply's. I have a wonderful therapist, she is helping my brain to heal, she tells me all of me is tired including my brain, she encourages me to do a little thing, then rest, eat healthy (I do), get sound sleep, take a walk, stay away from negative people they will only bring you down. You Can do all these things, forget the past it is over, concentrate on today only, tomorrow you will deal with it when it gets here. Find fun things to do that you enjoy, life is to be enjoyed. Do you have a good trusted friend you can talk too, if not then save it for the therapist, also write it in your journal, it is a good way of letting steam out. You may need some antidepressants for a while, I take them every day and have for decades, they have side affects and take about 6/8 weeks for the brain to totally accept them. So as I said be kind to yourself, love yourself, believe in yourself, write to us we will give you support and love. I send You Love, Peace, and Big Hugs.....Sprinkle 1....

[Kainan]

Hey. I know depression can be really tough. I feel for you. When I was 18, I couldn't be bothered to do anything. Just stayed in bed most of the day. Didn't even go to school. My dad would always wait by my bedside to take me to school and I would more often than not disappoint him. I hated myself. I hated everything. If you feel like doing something, if the back of your mind is screaming at you to something you know is right, then do it! If you don't, you will kick yourself afterwards. Get up. Take a shower. Brush your teeth. Make a good breakfast for yourself. A routine that will help you be at your best. Don't put it off. You deserve to have a good day. Be kind to yourself. Trust yourself. Then, you will know how to live. Let go of the past, and live right now!