Hello, I'm new here

[Raven3838]

Hello, I am new here, and I really need someone to talk to.

[Hidden]

You’ve come to the right place. I am fairly new as well.

Welcome

[Raven3838 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you. It's nice to meet you.

[Mary-intussuception]

Hello Raven

What's troubling you ?

[Raven3838 in reply to Mary-intussuception]

Hi there...

Thank you for your message. I just really don't know what to do anymore. I feel like everything is just completely awful, and I want to stay in my bed and never come out. I am so tired of feeling this way, but I don't know how to change it. I feel like I'm not strong enough to.

[Mary-intussuception in reply to Raven3838]

Have you had any blood tests or any other clinical investigations?

There could be a physical reason underlying your anxiety and Depression - for example these can be caused by an Underactive Thyroid.

[Raven3838 in reply to Mary-intussuception]

I don't currently have insurance, so I am in a little bit of a holding pattern. I used to be a really outgoing person, kept my house, my car clean. I was always on time with my work and projects, and now? I'd be embarrassed if anyone came to my house. It's disgusting.

[Mary-intussuception in reply to Raven3838]

Can you recall any event / illness / infection that occured around the time / just before things changed?

Is there any organisation or system that can help with medical costs?

Take a look on the Thyroid UK website sometime - look up the list of symptoms of Underactive Thyroid on there.

[Raven3838 in reply to Mary-intussuception]

I definitely will check that out. I think it started when I lost a job I really loved because of down-siding, and I had to move to a place I really didn't love for a different job. I left all my friends behind, and I haven't really met anyone to fill that void since. I can, in my mind, see the little steps backwards I've made since then. Lately though, it's been like gigantic leaps backwards. I just want to feel like myself again. The scariest thought for me is I never, ever will. This might be my new normal.

[Mary-intussuception in reply to Raven3838]

BUT - challenging as it is - you are looking for a new job. I think this is a big positive.

Do you pray?

I find that praying through everything helps. xx

[Raven3838 in reply to Mary-intussuception]

Thank you for saying that. There are a lot of changes coming. My last son is graduating this year and is off to college. I am afraid that I won't get another job, and that I won't be able to help him with school. I just drive myself a bit mad with all the thoughts I have.

I have tried praying. It just doesn't work for me. I appreciate the suggestion though.

[Mary-intussuception in reply to Raven3838]

It may not always feel like someone is listening but He is and does care. His ways are not our ways.

Try dismissing all the mad and negative thoughts. Keep on fighting, but remember to rest and be kind to yourself. You are Precious and Loved xx

Sometimes, I've found, when we don't know what to do it's OK to do nothing for a time. Let go of troubling thoughts and take some 'time out' of thinking , worrying. Get some rest. Do you ever have the house to yourself so you can listen to your favourite music or even sing?

Hope things turn around for you. ♡ xXx

[Sunnidayz1]

Welcome! Im here too. Hi!👋

[Raven3838 in reply to Sunnidayz1]

Hi there...thank you. I really appreciate it.

[Sunnidayz1 in reply to Raven3838]

Let us know what is happening and we'll try to help! We are a very helpful and sympathetic group!

[Raven3838 in reply to Sunnidayz1]

Thank you. I just don't know what to do. Yesterday was a real low point for me. I called into work because I felt so awful. I still felt terrible at the end of the day as well, and it was my son's last high school band concert, and it was so important, and I couldn't even enjoy it. I feel so guilty about both calling into work and also not being able to really be present for my son I can hardly breathe.

I am so tired of living this way, but I am so tired and I just feel like I can't breathe. I am hoping this is a step toward something different. I know I can't keep going like this.

[Sunnidayz1 in reply to Raven3838]

When u say you dont feel well is it depression & anxiety?

[Raven3838 in reply to Sunnidayz1]

Yes, it is.

[Sunnidayz1 in reply to Raven3838]

Being aware that you have a problem is the 1st step in getting better. That is great. Raven, to be honest, life is hard sometimes & I understand the guilt you feel about your son. I have a son too and I think Im always going to worry and feel guilty that Im not doing enough until the day I die. We do the best that we can do. Im sure he know you love him and that is all that matters in the end. It is. As far as your symptoms there is help out there. Anxiety & depression is more common than u think. If u have insurance see a therapist. There is no shame in that. Thetes no need to suffer anymore. Theres help and a cure

[Raven3838]

Thank you so much! I really appreciate your kind words. I don't currently have insurance, but I looking for a new job that would be able to provide that. I am also trying to find a therapist that works on a sliding fee scale or something like that. I live in the middle of nowhere, so it's a little bit challenging, but I am going to keep looking.

[Sunnidayz1 in reply to Raven3838]

No problem. Continue to use the site if u want to vent, ask questions, chat. We are here to help.

[Raven3838]

Thank you so much!

[gb14]

Hi, welcome! If you need to talk i’m here ♡

[Raven3838 in reply to gb14]

Thank you Carol! I really appreciate it!