New Here --- Hello. :)

Hi, i thought i'd try this for support. Hopefully after dealing with schizophrenia & anxiety & some depression for about 40 years, i might offer a bit of support too.

Through all of this, I've found that my passion for art helps me every day, but it also helps other people when i share it with them. I've been hand-making greeting cards for elderly/homebound folks for almost 8 years. While the things i deal with tend to turn my focus inward on myself, the greeting cards and helping others does help me a lot.

Last month I stopped Abilify after taking it for more than a decade. Psychosis is gone (woot!!!!!!) --- however, anxiety is starting up again.

I'm wondering about others' experiences with different benzodiazepines. Currently the one i take is Tranxene (clorazepate). As every person is different & meds will work different for everyone, it's not my intention to gauge how various benzos would work for ME, necessarily. My question is just, you know, what's been your experiences, how have these helped or not helped you, & also what else (medicinal or dietary or anything healthy) helps you cope & decreases your anxiety?

While Abilify WAS the antipsychotic which helped me more than anything, it caused significant dystonia & neck/back pain. Plus some weight gain (yarr!)

While I'm typing, i hope it's okay that I'd encourage everyone who deals with mental illness, I mean, i feel like it's not as understood as many other illnesses; if you're dealing with stigma or ridicule/rejection of any sort, know that i understand that very well (!!!!) & besides all this I just want to say HI.

Hopefully my photo attached. . . it's a recent drawing I did in my practice sketchbook.

My best wishes to anyone who's also struggling <3

xx

[Starrlight]

I love your art and how you help people! I do some art myself but for years now it’s a struggle to do art whereas before it was who I was what I did...

I have anxiety and bipolar and I just got off abilify this week got off propanolol and trying to get off Ativan because of hair loss. I am on lithium and Zyprexa now.

I have 2 little kiddos and one grown and that is how I stay busy which is helpful but I am tending to isolate.

It is so very nice to meet you. You are amazing!

[Hidden in reply to Starrlight]

Hi!! Thanks so much for your reply Starrlight. Very nice to meet you too, and I'm relieved to meet someone else with medicinal hair loss!!!! I know how that goes. The isolation too. I didn't know Ativan could cause hair loss. I truly hope you feel better (i hope that doesn't sound insincere but I know that simply feeling better would be SUCH a relief. xx

[Starrlight in reply to Hidden]

Thank you! Well the Ativan is a possibility but it could be from stress or even genetics.

Anyway I hope you will post more art and I think I will eventually post more of mine as well. Art can be so uplifting!

[Hidden in reply to Starrlight]

Ohhh, Starrlight, whether your hair loss is from meds, stress, or genetics, (or a combo??) -- you're pretty super and i hope the hair loss isn't too bothersome (ehh, well mine is to me!)

Yeah!! I would encourage your art, just wondering if you ever do any art with your kids. ? I never had kids but rumor has it they can be a handful. Heh! Blessings to you !!!! x

[Starrlight in reply to Hidden]

Thank you so much! I dont feel super right now and am having trouble getting off ativan because I am so anxious without.. how long did it take for your hair to stop falling out after stopping the med that caused it?

Yes I do art with my kiddos and it’s great. Sometimes I just watch them create; they are so free and spontaneous with it. Ha yes they are a handful! A good type though. They keep me going.

Blessings and a beautiful day to you!

[Hidden in reply to Starrlight]

Hey! Are you titrating down/tapering off ativan? I wonder because I've come off various meds before a bit too fast and the withdrawal symptoms were horrific. At times my anxiety was worse (as well as physical symptoms like headaches etc). I wish you felt better!

As for hair fallout, it took several months for my hair to (pretty much) quit that. The meds we take (& other stuff that we eat, etc.) are secreted through our hair growth, and can damage hair etc. Not only did my hair come out a lot, but it completely stopped growing & broke off really easily! (This was from Topamax) ~ I notice a lot less hair loss these days but mine may be some age/genetics/????? who knows what as well.

One thing that seems to be helping is to do a conditioning treatment once a week or so. I also take Biotin supplements.

(Last year, I even tried Rogaine, but it didn't seem to do much, was pricey (!!!!), and I actually experienced some weight gain from it. Hm!!

I'm glad your kids keep you going, as you say. Yeah! <3

[Starrlight in reply to Hidden]

I am on a very low dose so no tapering. I have to be strong. I feel like in two months I won’t have any hair left. I wish I knew what exactly was causing it for sure because if it’s stress then going off will not be helpful but I do have a feeling it’s a med. yes, my hair is breaking off too and it’s like a nightmare but I have been taking Rogaine and I do notice some growing back in places. I really appreciate your kindness and it helps to talk about it. Best to you 💕 hope you are well.

[Hidden in reply to Starrlight]

Starrlight, i appreciate your kindness too!! Yeah, I'm feeling pretty good today (yesterday was worse). I'm happy that you say it helps you to talk. It helps me too. THANK YOU!!!!! <3 xx

[Starrlight in reply to Hidden]

I’m so glad you are feeling good today AnxiousArtist!!! I am happy for you. We have to soak up the easier days and try to remember they do exsist... for me I tend to get stuck in a bad day and have trouble believing the good can exsist. I am going out with family and friends to watch my 10 yr old in a skateboarding competition. I hope I can enjoy it the thought of it all makes me overwhelmed with anxiety but I will try to be strong so I won’t miss out by being in my own world. What are you up to today?

[Hidden in reply to Starrlight]

Ahh I hope you have a good time today; and that you are able to stay as relaxed as possible.

Today I'm working on some art --- making the usual greeting cards & also crocheting some. I went to the store this morning too.

Enjoy yourself today !! xx

[Starrlight in reply to Hidden]

Sounds awesome! You are inspiring me to do some art too. Happy crocheting and greeting card making my friend! Btw I have made cards as well in the past. Really good feeling to create them. Thank you and you enjoy yourself too! 😊

[Stilltrying_]

Beautiful art and a lovely uplifting message; Thanks Can't really advise on the meds as my condition different from yours. I take lorazepam on an "as needed" basis when I hit a place where nothing else works but my diagnosis is anxiety and depression. Gemmalouise xxx

[Hidden in reply to Stilltrying_]

Hey there!! Thank you for your reply! And no problem if you can't really advise on meds --- i really do hope the lorazepam is at least a LITTLE helpful? Praying you're well, thanks again Gemmalouise!! x

[Stilltrying_ in reply to Hidden]

Thank you. I am going through a very bad patch but reading posts on here and elsewhere helps ease it a bit. I would love to see you post up another of your art work as I can see you are a genuinely very talented lady. x Ah ! Have just seen your blogspot (posted up on your profile) Wow you are immensely talented and very thoughtful/deep. I love your blog.

[bridder01]

Welcome to group Anxious one! You've definitely found a group of very supportive people here! I'm glad to know ya!

I hear ya about meds.....worst one I ever took was Lithium. You feel like you were in a perpetual haze and every limb dragged on the floor. I went without meds for 12 years before I went back on. Main one has been adderall. My mood is definitely more stable now.

Oh, and your pic posted.....it's awesome! If you ever feel like sharing......you've got a friend in me

Sincerely,

Brian

[Hidden in reply to bridder01]

Hi Brian! Yeh, it seems quite supportive here! Also there seem to be lots of people having hard times so I hope i can be of support to anyone who needs it. It's great to "meet" you or at least talk!!!! Thanks for friendship!! x

[bridder01 in reply to Hidden]

Anytime! Don't be a stranger 😁

[Jamie2018]

I live your artwork! I used to be pretty good at art years ago. I have anxiety and depression and take sertraline been on it for years and it works pretty good for me. I would love to see more of your art!

[Hidden in reply to Jamie2018]

Hey Jamie! Thank you for your comment and I'd bet you're still good at art!!! I'm happy to hear that your meds are helping you. Woohoo! My best wishes to you for good days. . . <3 x

[Hidden]

Your situation is relatable, Here_I_am --- My doc put me on Topomax to help with my moods. But i was on it for years. . .I'd say I lost half my hair. Ativan for 6 months isn't terribly long, so I really feel for you. Sometimes I think it would avail the patient much much more if our doctors warned us of potential side effects. I guess they may think the benefits outweigh hair loss, weight gain, tardive dyskenesia, etc etc etc ? Hang in there, Here_I_am. x

[Lisajaynedavies]

Just saying hi and love your art, kinda sums me up straight way. Not how I look to the outside world but how I look when I see myself in the mirror or shop windows. Just an observation!

Anyway I take diazepam and find it fabulous, I try and contol it but breaking the tables up and then taking them at various points in the day. I’m anxious pretty much all the time so it does help to take the edge off.

Nutritional check out the medical medium he’s on instagram and has a few books, it’s insane what conditions he has healed through certain foods. Massive article in this weekends paper about the correlation between inflamation in the body and depression. So interesting, please check it out.

Have a great day Lisa x

[Hidden in reply to Lisajaynedavies]

Hi Lisa! thank you ---- I really hope your day's going well. Diazepam --- I've never been on that one, I'm glad it works for you/helps you!

Thanks so much for your kind reply

You have a wonderful day too Lisa!! xx

[Lisajaynedavies]

Tables is obviously tablets

[Hidden in reply to Lisajaynedavies]

I got ya there. xx

[mrmonk]

Hello AnxiousArtist,

I just wanted to add my voice to the chorus of welcomes to you, and accolades for your art.

I visited the art blog you posted in your profile, and though I know very little about visual art, your portrait drawings are striking and emotive; the eyes tell such stories. And though I'm not familiar with any of the artists from whom you drew inspiration in your Style Studies, the concept itself is very familiar to me, as I do the same thing with poets.

I love poetry, so I was pleasantly surprised to encounter the poems on the art blog. I enjoyed reading them a great deal. I'm going through a rough patch at the moment, and struggling to focus, so I hardly know what to say (I usually jabber giddily about craft when it comes to poetry), but just the act of reading verse allows me to connect with something simultaneously released and encased by language and form, by sound and rhythm -- I don't know what that something is (the soul, maybe!) but I know that it makes me feel so much less alone. So, I am grateful to have stumbled onto your poems, however inadvertently.

I don't have much experience with medications or with successful management of anxiety to offer any insight, I'm sorry to say. But if you ever want to talk poetry, or just talk, feel free to message me. Take care and be well.

[Hidden in reply to mrmonk]

Hi mrmonk!

Thank you for your welcome & it's good to know there's another person here who's really into poetry. Thank you for complimenting my blog ~~ and it's perfectly okay about having no insight to offer as far as meds or anxiety!! I really appreciate your support -- that's wonderful!!

I'm really sorry that you say you're going through a rough patch though. Sure, we can talk about poetry or whatever ~ just know you have my support as well!

THANK YOU for your kindness! Keep writing xx

[mrmonk in reply to Hidden]

And thank you for your support, as well, AnxiousArtist.

I wish I could be more of a support for folks here, but I'm struggling just to string thoughts together. I feel like barely a presence these days.

I hope you are well.

[AWTTY]

Hi- I just joined...looking for people to connect with. Love your art! Very powerful. I did my first post tonight...no idea what I am doing I'm not really an online persona. But I am here because I suffer from anxiety- quite a bit, and am worried this might be slipping into depression.

I've not had a struggle with schizophrenia - sorry about the side effects from meds...keep trying with your docs.

Hugs!