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Intrusive Thoughts

bebosmith profile image
23 Replies

Hi First time Poster

I am a 29 year old male happily married lovely little boy and another on the way - However i suffer really bad from intrusive thoughts i have recently come off sertraline which i was on for 8 months and this helped immensely i now feel like i have relapsed though the thoughts have returned with vengeance - I see myself chucking myself down stairs hurting my son etc not great thoughts at all - I am wanting to understand if anybody has any tips etc i i am back at the doctors on Monday but i dont want to be on sertraline all my life

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bebosmith
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23 Replies

Sometimes, we just have to do what we have to do in life to get through successfully. I didn’t want to be on Lithium all my life, but here I sit, 30 years later, realizing and accepting that very fact. If I don’t have my mental health in check, what do I have? Nothing. Thoughts of hurting my family would be enough to send me running to my Psychiatrist. I hope you’ll seek treatment right away...

Martok profile image
Martok in reply to

When you use Lithium, it is the OTC supplement type?

in reply to Martok

No, it’s prescribed by a doctor...Lithium Carbonate 300mg capsules. It requires a prescription in the US.

By the way, welcome to this forum! Lots of support here! I’m glad you’re here!

gerg profile image
gerg

It is so good that you are seeking help. Few people have the courage that you have shown.

I see all medications as being temporary. I don’t know what the future will bring, so I try not to forecast the long term. A lot will change between now and then, and every change will alter my forecast. Too much to think about.

I would take my meds, for now, and keep talking about these issues. Secrecy and denial are your enemy. Maybe talk to your doctor about therapy, it is a good path to working yourself off of medications. The worst mental health issues is one that is not being addressed.

Keep reaching out, I will do everything that I can to help.

fauxartist profile image
fauxartist in reply to gerg

I hear what your saying gerg....but for some forms of mental illness, it should be addressed that medication is essential until a viable alternative is affordable and reliable. Medication for extreme bipolar, schizophrenia, manic episodes is essential....so I wouldn't encourage anyone to stop taking their meds under those circumstances... Too much social stigma has been attached to needing medication when necessary being some form of weakness,...and too many un-necessary medications are prescribed by the boat load like Smarties being handed out....so there has to be some happy medium...a healthy balance. And yes...hopefully down the road in the not too distant future, we can simply eat a plant at dinner that keeps our equilibrium with depression or anxiety balanced and treated in full...all natural with no side effects....

gerg profile image
gerg in reply to fauxartist

I was not encouraging anyone to stop talking meds, I was suggesting a change of perspective that makes taking them more tolerable.

fauxartist profile image
fauxartist in reply to gerg

no....no... I know you weren't.... I'm sorry I didn't mean for my response to sound like you were.... I just know that for some folks it's good to know that what works for one may not for another.....sorry gerg... didn't mean to overstep.

fauxartist profile image
fauxartist

first of all...if I may ask....why did you stop taking your meds if they were working....and I have to say if your in fear for your sons safety....you cannot be alone with him under any circumstances till you get yourself properly diagnosed to find out what is going on. I'm sorry but I am being blunt and honest about this as it could be just one uncontrollable urge for a moment that changes lives forever....and especially the love you have for your son certainly has to out weight being uncertain about these urges and being alone with him or anyone for that matter....and intrusive thoughts may be all it is...but it's a pretty scary serious one. None of us are experts here and I strongly suggest you get help immediately for everyone's sake....my best wishes to you and yours my friend....

bebosmith profile image
bebosmith in reply to fauxartist

Hi thank you for your reply I stopped taken the meds because I felt back to my normal self and was enjoying life again so I wanted to gradually come off them which I did through management with my doctor I have been fully off them for around 5 weeks - the withdrawal was awful then since my feelings have gradually worse - I must admit I feel the worse when I am hungry or tired

fauxartist profile image
fauxartist in reply to bebosmith

that makes sense....as we are already stressed being hungry or tired...but some of us just need to take meds...others manage okay with other alternatives.... I have to take my SSRI.... it's a low dose and I'm good with that.

bebosmith profile image
bebosmith in reply to fauxartist

Can I ask how long you have been taking the meds for also I thi k I wanted to stop because I may have had a fear over the long term side effects of the meds is anything proven on this

fauxartist profile image
fauxartist in reply to bebosmith

I've been on them for about 15 years now... I started way back in the early days of anti-depressants as they are evolved to today. And the one thing I know is to not stop taking my SSRI and to take it religiously or you will feel the effects quickly enough. I had to go through some trial and error with finding the one that worked best for me, I have no side effects like some others have described.... I don't feel anything other than just a bit better...lighter in mood in general... I take the lightest dosage though....

But the biggest mistake a lot do make is that they are feeling better and think they no longer need the SSRI's..that means they were doing their job, but we don't know that until the withdrawals hit...and then we slide back down in mood. I found out the hard way to never stop cold turkey...my friends lost their son that way, someone gave him a small paperback book on how to live life drug free...but it didn't take into consideration that going cold turkey off Paxil can have devastating effects. Within a week... he was gone...and his note said all his demons had come back.... his case was the worst case scenario sadly...but something to keep in mind with taking antidepressants and it is why many fear them. But I just have a routine.

kenster1 profile image
kenster1

before I was ever diagnosed with anything I used to have thoughts about harming a good friend of mine.i hated it and never understood why it was happening.over twenty years later we are still friends and the feelings went away long before I started taking medication.this is different though in your case but you need to seek help asap.its a terrible situation for you as it concerns your son but you have to get it out in the open.just wondered if you had a difficult up brining or anything recent that's triggered off these thoughts.

Calm_mama profile image
Calm_mama

Hi Bebosmith!

Pls see my response to Tado from earlier this AM: healthunlocked.com/anxiety-...

I hope this helps!

bebosmith profile image
bebosmith

Thank you for all of your comments these are very much appreciated it is great to be able to chat about them I must admit though my intrusive thoughts or sticky mind is much heightened when I am tired or hungry anybody have any similar circumstances

RobynC profile image
RobynC in reply to bebosmith

I’ve had intrusive thoughts since a kid! They are only thoughts . You love your son and you won’t hurt him . Don’t let your mind control you . I know it’s easier said than done but just remind yourself in the moment that they are just thoughts . You are not alone , I promise . I get them and they suck and make you feel like somethings wrong with you but it’s just a sticky mind and it means nothing . As you learn to not give it so much power , they will subside and when they come back , just keep reminding yourself that thoughts are thoughts and don’t mean ur going to act upon whatever the disturbing thought is. The more you think about something the more power you give it !

RobynC profile image
RobynC in reply to RobynC

I’m also sad ppl r telling you to seek help bc they think you might actually harm your son ! The mere fact that you feel anxious and disturbed is a sign that you wouldn’t act upon it ! Whenever the intrusive thought comes , Try practicing like mentally just accepting it and letting it pass . It’s not going to go away overnight but in time it will subside and won’t be an everyday thing once you truly accept that your not actually going to act upon it And it doesn’t mean anything and your thoughts do not define you

Mommyyof02 profile image
Mommyyof02 in reply to RobynC

Came across this post becuase i am also a mother of 2 boys who mean the world to me And i also get terrible intrusive thoughts that scare me reading these peoples replies made the fear stronger And made me feel so bad i wish i hadnt read them now i cant stop overthinking 😢these thoughts and urges feel so real its scary i would never hurt my babies in any way i rather be away from then if im a danger to then but i love then with all my heart eventho ocd and anxiety wont let me enjoy them like i wld few months ago😢😢💔

soulsquest7 profile image
soulsquest7

Hey! Thanks for reaching out and your honesty! I'm currently doing some cognitive behavioral therapy which is helping understand thoughts and how to manage them. Have you considered reaching out to a counselor? Blessings,

Tado profile image
Tado

Not that this is very helpful but I’m in the exact place you are. I was on Paxil at 18yo. Went off of it after a bad car accident. Then fast forward to now, I’m 22 yo with a husband and daughter and have had a random bout of intrusive thoughts. It started with odd thoughts like sexual and fear of medical issues with my daughter and now has progressed to overwhelming violent thoughts. I felt like I was experiencing psychosis it was so bad. Like my brain checked out and I felt like I wasn’t really here. I have always gone to a counseling but now I’m going to an OCD/anxiety specific therapist to see if I can get to the point of normality. I also built up a fear of medication so I hope to get to the point that I either don’t need it or can actually take it without fear.

Best of luck to you! Please keep us posted! I go to my therapist for the first time this evening and I’m also having my dr check my thyroid in case, too.

Martok profile image
Martok

When I was on Zoloft years ago and got off, it was very tough. Getting off those meds is not easy. What has helped me (and I let it drop and now I feel it) is a supplement program Dr. Linus Pauling used to treat patients. orthomolecular.org/resource...

Flowergigi profile image
Flowergigi

I have the exact same thought when going down stairs

I hope you are feeling better

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