This is my first post I just wanted to get my thoughts out there. Today I walked past a tree and looked at the branches and thought to myself that looks a good one to hang myself from.
I have suffered with depression for as long as I can remember I currently take 50mg Sertraline. I feel worthless in life and I'm tired.
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Hi ! What do you think your depression stems from , figuring that out then maybe you can take steps to work towards a happy state .
I actually think it'll look better without you hanging from it. You'll look better in that case as well.
I won't pretend to understand what you're going through, but it must be tough for you, and I'm really glad that what you described was just a thought. Hang in there ❤️
I may be old, but I kept looking at trees and branches for about a year, a couple of years ago. I understand. It is called suicide ideation. Since I am sure you are young, I think you should give yourself more of a chance for a good life. Life is funny. It never stays the same. It is always changing. Just think, you may be one of the lucky ones.
I don't know your situation which could make a difference in how you approach dark thoughts. The mind tells lies to the vulnerable, and unfortunately they affect feelings and even actions. I have taken classes on how to change thoughts which was very helpful. It helps separate one from unwanted thoughts. We are not our negative thoughts--they are not our identity. You were not born to think dark thoughts. Knowledge can change one's perspective and help you follow routines that renew the mind. I would choose to stop the dark thought and change it to noticing the beauty of the tree and the miracle that grew it and how you could grow like that tree and flourish.
In dark time I look at beams in my garage and wonder which ones would hold me. It takes therapy, meds and constant work to pull myself out of those times. Do you have a support system? Therapist?
No I don't have anyone I lost all my friends when I was drinking. Trying to get any help for mental health near me is impossible it's a three month wait for any type of counseling then only get so many weeks. They gave me CBT therapy but I just sat in the meeting and cried.
Crying through a meeting is something. It shows you are not numb and open to feel something. I cried during my first three therapy sessions non stop. I don’t really think I put together a full sentence but eventually it got better. Slowly. And with a lot of work. I would suggest going back to the meetings; you may find in time they start to help and may even make some friends. In the meantime, we are here for you.
I asked for help from my gp surgery for depression as I couldn’t deal with it on my own anymore. I started a course of therapy talking to a therapist on the phone. The doctor prescribed a low dose of sertraline but after two days I had a very bad headache and pain in my face and jaw so I stopped taking it. I feel like I’m not feeling better with the therapy but my neice who had depression said keep going , it will take time and phone the GP about the medication side effects. I really feel for you joeburger , have you tried phoning helplines like the Samaritans when you have suicidal thoughts?
I’m in the same situation. I often think about things around the house, and wonder if it’d be easy for me. It sucks. Hopefully this site can work for you.
Sorry you're having a rough time..have been there. Don't know where you live, US or otherwise, but since it's such a long wait for in person therapy, perhaps you could try online therapy. I've heard many good things about Better Help and there's also Online-Therapy.com. as well as others. There are licensed therapists on those sites. Might be a good place to try at least in the interim until you can get in to see someone in person.
Hope things get better for you!!
I live in the UK and the mental health support is terrible you can only have a crisis between 9-5 on Monday to Friday 😔😢
Dark thoughts...
I’m in a serious dark place
My light in a dark place 
I can't get of this dark place
I’m on the slippery slope to the dark place...
