Over it: I was hanging out with one of... - Anxiety and Depre...

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Over it

gilded_masquerade
gilded_masquerade

I was hanging out with one of my old friends today and at some point she had informed me that my abusive narcissistic ex was STILL posting about me a YEAR later from our breakup.

I have absolutely no contact with him, and so on and maybe I didn't need to know but my friend is just looking out for me. She sent me this (above), it's from his Facebook and is referencing me vaguely.

It honestly bothers me so much how he's dragging my name through the mud and blaming me for leaving him and everything else in between. I'm well aware that because he is a narcissist he is looking for attention and playing victim.

But he has abused me in essentially every way, manipulated me, lied to me, etc. And he's blaming me.

Sure I wasn't perfect in that mess of a relationship but I don't appreciate the fact that he's still talking crap about me a year later.

I just cannot even fathom why he's still going on about this.

PS: Yes, he's trying to be a legit rapper.

7 Replies
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I was in a relationship with someone who was narcissistic, and yes, they like to play victim when it suits them. The fact that your ex had to put his version of events in a song further illustrates that mentality.

It is easy for me to say, but don't let that bother you. Although you found this out through someone else, don't give him the satisfaction of thinking he is still important to you in that sense. Whenever I played "the game" with my ex, she seemed to feed off of things even more when I interacted with her. The worse thing for her was to be ignored.

You're right, it just really bothers me that he can't let go. And it's just more frustrating when he's doing stuff like this and I can't exactly react without making it worse, especially if he's writing songs about it.

The other part that really sucks about all this is that no one really knows how he treated me and abused me and so on, I never felt like it was necessary to share u less someone asked (which no one did or when they did it was right after the breakup) plus I find it's hard to share stuff like that without people judging.

I don't know, this just sucks but I'm trying my hardest to not let it get to me or care.

I get your frustration. But you are taking for high road and he is not. There is a lot to be said for that. The people around you might be aware of the abuse that you suffered, but they probably see that you are the person with character vs your ex. If he is still dragging you through the mud after all that time that becomes a major turn off to people and people generally see through that too.

Thanks, as I said I'm trying my best to ignore it and not re-involve myself with his nonsense.

He's been getting into a lot of bad predicaments, even along the lines of illegal.

I am certainly happy I'm not involved with him anymore, but yeah I was just a little bothered. But thank you again :)

People use past experiences in their art. As long as he's leaving you alone and not writing something horrible, it doesn't really matter why he's doing it, does it? The guy's got a lot of problems, so chalk it up to that and move on. You're broken up. Live your life and forget about it.

You're right, thanks :)

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