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Helping my girlfriend.

Lyhn profile image
Lyhn
11 Replies

Hi to everyone! I'm Lyhn and I'm new here.

I discovered this website thanks to one of my friend who is a therapist.

I'm here because I want to help my girlfriend, but I don't know how to do so in a healthy way without compromising my mental health while helping her to stand on her own feet. She was diagnosed with depression few years ago and when she was a teenager she already had a therapist. Few months ago she had some auto-lesionism episodes. Now she is better, but the depression is still there. She is going to the psycologist and the psychiatrist. BUT she doesn't take her pills like she should and she didn't say it to both of them. I want to help her in a costructive way, I want to show her my support, I just don't know which is the best way to do so.

Any advice would be helpful.

Thank you a lot in advance.

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Lyhn profile image
Lyhn
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11 Replies

Boy that's a difficult situation! We all have to be willing to do what we have to to help ourselves! I sure do wish you the best of luck with this situation!!! Have a wonderful day!!! XXX

Lyhn profile image
Lyhn in reply to

Thank you :)

in reply toLyhn

My pleasure!!!

Dubba61 profile image
Dubba61

Difficult for you Lyhn, n I think, in this case "tough love" is the only answer. Have a chat, n tell her, in no uncertain terms, that in order to get better, she does need to take the Meds. Not for ever, but, for now! Say that if she won't, then you cannot help her. As it will effect your own Mental health. If you can, watch her take them. I really hope this works. Good Luck 😊🌻✌️

Lyhn profile image
Lyhn in reply toDubba61

Thank you:)

Hi and welcome!

I think your place as her friend is to be as supportive as you can. Maybe sometime when she’s talking about her meds or when you think it’s a good time, casually refer to the fact that you have to take your meds daily in order to get a favorable response. Unfortunately, it’s up to her to make the decision to take her meds as prescribed. She’s going to have to figure it out herself, and probably the hard way! When she gets in enough pain and has a desire to truly feel better, she’ll take it. You’re an awesome friend for being so concerned about her! I hope you have a great day!!

Lyhn profile image
Lyhn in reply to

She is an awesome girlfriend ;) thank you a lot for your kind words and your advice! I hope she will understand this sooner rather than later.

Hope you have a great day as well :)

fauxartist profile image
fauxartist

what is auto-lesionism episodes, thanks

Lyhn profile image
Lyhn in reply tofauxartist

Self-harm. Sorry, I mixed and matched my languages ahahah

fauxartist profile image
fauxartist in reply toLyhn

thank you now I understand....

Made4Match profile image
Made4Match

Hi Lyhn!

You are so wonderful for taking the time to reach out to those around you for help. Situations like the one you described can always be challenging to navigate just due to those involved. It's about finding the right amount of balance with helping/supporting while also giving those we love the room to make their own choices.

I would definitely sit down with her and share how proud you are of her for seeing a psychologist and psychiatrist and working to seek professional help. Consider sharing though that her medication goes hand in hand with her self-care.

An analogy I sometimes use with my students is in regards to fueling a car. It's like buying gasoline for a car but not putting it into the tank. It's great to have on hand, but if we're not using it for it's intended purpose, we're not going to end up going as far as we could have had it been in the tank.

I hope this helps! Remember to spend some time caring for your self as well. Self-care is so important in our everyday lives!

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