Hopeless

[Brinks9]

My anxiety comes and goes but lately I feel like my negative thoughts have been making me more sad than anxious. I feel like I will never overcome my panic attacks and will continue missing out on life. I feel like I'm making all the wrong choices and I will mess up my life. I will be visiting my parents for the next two weeks and though that should bring me a lot of joy and excitement I just feel sad about it. I haven't been able to go christmas shopping because of my anxiety and I'm low on cash this year due to my car breaking down and applying for graduate school. It makes me feel like a shitty family member, like i can't get anyone good gifts. I feel like everything will continue to go wrong and I will continue to mess everything up. Right now, I feel hopeless.

[Isaack]

Do not feel hopeless dear. You are not a shotty family member. You love your family and that's all that matters. Giving gifts to family does does not mean anything. If you don't have the money to give then its okay. Just show your love and that's all that matters. I my self love my family so much but I don't always give them gifts or ever. Don't let those thoughts of worthiness go through your head. Be glad and rejoice because you are able to see your parents. Do not waste your time worrying about what you can't do. Spend time doing what you can do!! Such as telling jokes and sharing stories with family. Gifts don't mean everything. Personal connection means everything. Be happy dear and know that you are loved. So please love yourself and know that God made you unique and there is no one like you. Please don't ever use those awful words on yourself. Instead look around you and know that you got so much to be happy about. Life can always get worse just enjoy the little things in life. I hope you get well and im hoping that meeting your parents will make you happy dear.

[Brinks9 in reply to Isaack]

Thank you so much for your words Isaack! I appreciate your input and I do agree that I shouldn't worry about gifts. I am working to try to fight my negative thoughts i just feel like they are so much stronger than i am sometimes. Your words are very encouraging and helpful

[Isaack in reply to Brinks9]

I hope you find the strength. Its easier said then done but its really all we can do!!

[Hidden]

That is a trick of the devil. I use to struggle with these same areas. I would start telling the devil " I rebuke your negative thoughts of me. Your family will be happy to see you with or without presents. Talk to God as if you r talking to one of your best friends and tell Him how much u love Him. Then tell Him the things u want Him to calm in your life. Love you to life💖

[Brinks9 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you I have been trying to work on my communication with God recently as a colleague has suggested the same thing. It is helpful.