Hopeless

[Jamm8]

I am new here. I have a million things going on in my head right now. I've reached out to crisis hotline and my panic attack calmed down. But...I feel like I have no reason or purpose anymore. My husband lives with another woman, we've been separated for awhile now. My kids are grown and moved far away...both of them. I feel like a lump. I lost everything. I am 44 and living with my mother and sister...but I live in the basement...and I'm treated like the evil stepsister. What do you do when you feel like there is nothing to live for anymore? I buckle over sometimes in pain...partly from my health conditions, but my heart is broken. I tore apart what's left of my life earlier...looking for anything I could find of my babies when they were babies. God this hurts....BAD. And to top it off, all I do is live in my room in the basement. I don't want to go anywhere. Idk what to do. I'm stuck...there is so much more but it's too much to type out. I am severely depressed I feel like I can't move....it's too hard to do even a simple thing. I recently found out I have a cyst on my lung too. Hell...I don't think anyone even cares. IDK. I feel done. I feel like there is NO reason I can think of to go on. I need emotional support (that came from my psychiatrist) I'm just looking for input bcuz I know the strength is In me....I just can't get it right now. Thank you for reading if you made it this far!

[Christrev]

Hey there,

Have you made arrangements with your Doctor to enrol on cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT)? If not then you should do this as soon as possible to get the process moving. If you have and you are waiting/didn't experience any benefit then I would recommend using either facebook or just searching on google to see if there are public meetings in your area of people with depression and other mental health problems. Just attend one of these meetings and speak to at least one person or the group about what you are bottling up inside. You will experience a massive weight being unloaded each time you speak to someone about these feelings to the point where you'll be so sick of speaking about it that it will feel like it was a small problem when you look back in the future. You should speak to someone and then you will feel motivation creeping back into your life to get out and do more.

[2017runner]

Sending you love today. I hear your pain, I hear it is physical pain, emotional pain and mental pain. It is hard to bear, I hear that. I also hear that you know that the strength is in you. But you just can't find it right now. But you know it is there. So maybe for today just feel the pain, give yourself permission to cry and cry in your basement if you need to. The strength is there, you know it and when you are ready you will be able to use it to move forward. Sending you so much love for today xxxx

[snow_queen]

I 100% agree with the other two people who’ve responded already. Taking that first step and getting out is going to be the hardest thing. But you can do it. And once you find even one person to talk to it will be easier to move from there ❤️

[JkBrauer]

I am sorry to hear about how rough things are going for you right now. Remember you are not alone in this situation. Life is a rough road! Sometimes it can get topsy- turvy, however, we must never give up! These storms in life are here to teach us lessons in life that we need to learn. - Thomas Edison quoted; "Success is 90% Attitude and 10% Knowledge." In other words, Life can be a tornado, a whirlwind of chaos, how we choose to go through it is up to us. If we go in with a positive attitude and know that you have peace and patience to endure through all that life is doling out, you will gain the wisdom to know how to work through the problem that is at hand and then take the next step. I am a praying person. I believe that prayer is a very powerful tool in working through tough times.

Psalm 46:10

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, even though the earth be removed, and the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea; though its waters roar and be troubled, though the mountains shake with swelling.

And; Psalm 27:14 -

Wait upon the LORD be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart; wait, I say, on the Lord!

Remember we are here for you. We care and want to help you!

[puglove0093]

Even though I don't know you personally, I care about what you're going through/feeling. I am so sorry. Are you going to get the cyst removed?

Also, have you gone to see a counselor/therapist? I know a lot of places can be affordable and I think everyone, and I mean everyone, should talk to one in their lifetime. We all have things we need to work out and talk through.

Also, for me, I went through a time where I felt like I had nothing to live for and the only thing that kept me going was, for me, my faith. I would pray even though it was silent and I would cry out to God everyday and ask for help. I am not 100% better, but I have hope again and I know that reading scripture for me and praying and talking to friends/counselor was what helped me.

I hope you start to see the light again!!!!

[Hidden]

Hi, I hope you believe that life has more for you than this. Life comes in chapters, chapters end and new chapters begin. I’ve been divorced, and started completely over, sharing a room in my parents house with my little daughter. It’s hard work, but a new chapter opened and life is better than ever. There are many things you can do. Now is the time to find your passion, something you’ve wanted to do. Take classes, get a part time job, volunteer, go to divorce care groups and meet people, join meetup and learn something new. Be open to a new life. Grieve the old life but don’t stay there, start to live again. It does get better, but it takes your willingness and baby steps to move forward.

[Skatergirl1]

Hi, sorry to hear you are having a tough time at the moment, but it will pass and you will move on and upwards. You are still young and have a lot of life left to live. I am 57, and have endured a lot in my life, and trust me I have been in your shoes where I have wanted it all to end, but I found the strength to start over, and as Lynnalice says, life comes in chapters. When I was a child, I was sexually abused by two different people when I was 12, i left home a 17 and moved away from my family, I was raped at 22 and told nobody. I lived with someone for 10 years, and left because he was an alcoholic and started to get violent, but I carried on. I got married, bought a house, ran my own business and was very happy and have travelled a lot around the world, then 10 years ago I got cancer, my husband had an affair, I had a mental breakdown, lost my house and business and was left with nothing. I licked my wounds for a year and started over again. I retrained in a new career, moved into a rented house and am enjoying life again, i work full time, and make the most of every opportunity that comes my way. I was diagnosed severe COPD last year and again make the most of the opportunities that come my way, and do what I can do. I can work, I can ice skate, I can meet friends, I am learning to speak greek, there are a lot of things I can do, and you can do those things too. Please don't think this is the end for you, it is just the beginning, take time out just for you, work out what makes you happy, or what you want to do in the future, you don't need a partner to make you happy, start my making yourself happy and the rest will follow. I now look at life as a total adventure, I never know what is coming around that corner but embrace every experience, and think to myself, gosh my life is not boring lol xxx Have faith, everything will work out for you for the better eventually!!

[Hidden in reply to Skatergirl1]

Amazing life journey you have had!! I love your approach to life.