Attachment

I have a really hard time keeping friends and don't have any of the same friends I had growing up. Besides this, or maybe because of this (?), I attach to people disturbingly fast. As soon as I'm that person's friend I tell them about my mental illnesses and life struggles and my happiness hinges souly on that one person. I've never had more than one friend who actually cares for how I feel and I'm actually a relatively reserved person but once someone shows compassion I'm never leaving their side. They need to be with me every where I go, or else I don't feel safe. I've never been in a romantic relationship (I'm not looking for one but I'm also scared to have one) and I really can't tell the difference between my romantic feelings and just me caring for my friends. It's extremely stressful and I'm just not sure what to do.

4 Replies

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  • I understand. I'm sorry.

  • I can relate to most of what you are saying 1BrightStar and it is a tough place to be in ! what i have been learning thru my hard times of isolation is learning how to be more friendly with myself - cause it seems to me that is where i had to start ! Not easy either yet this has helped me gain more ground in my life and start to understand what 'Boundaries' mean in 'positive' relating. I continue to go thru challenges and it isn't easy yet learning to love mySelf has started me on a healthier path and maybe there is something in this For You ?! Hope my thoughts are welcome and take good care of yourSelf Bright Star ! **

  • I have never told any of my friends about my condition. Actually, I have very few friends as well. The issues may be hindering us from forming lasting, meaningful relationships. It doesn't bother me often but does on occasion. I would take it very slowly when meeting people and pretend you're a farmer: plant, nurture, and let them grow organically. If relationships don't work out the way you want them to, move on or understand it's limitations.

  • I am sorry. Have you tried going to a support group or therapist? I was curious- about age etc. I have also had challenges with learning about boundaries and rumination. I don't normally tell anyone about struggles unless it comes up in conversation. Many more people have struggles sometimes than we realize.

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