Boyfriend broke up : I need support... - Mental Health Sup...

Mental Health Support

31,319 members17,125 posts

Boyfriend broke up

Dogmad600 profile image
61 Replies

I need support from you I suffer from social anxiety and depression and my boyfriend just broke up with me so crying

Written by
Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
Read more about...
61 Replies
kenster1 profile image
kenster1

hi sorry to hear that maybe give it a couple of days maybe you both can have a talk about things.

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to kenster1

Nope we can’t

kenster1 profile image
kenster1 in reply to Dogmad600

oh sorry to hear that 7 years is a long time take time to heal you will get through this.

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to kenster1

Thanks it’s hard

Dog Mad

Sorry that your Boyfriend has walked away from you it is never easy especially when we are still young and we wonder will we ever love again. Sometimes yes it is hard, sometimes the moving on can be a blessing in disguise, all part of finding the right person to be with for the years of our Life.

You do not explain what caused the breakup was it your low mood or something else ??

I remember when I was in my Teens through Twenties I met many people and so many relationships past me in the darkness of night. I met my proper partner when I was twenty eight and I knew it was the correct one for me. Now a pensioner we are still with each other and our lives are as they were those many years ago.

So try not to be discouraged. You will know when the right person arrives

BOB

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to

He met another girl

in reply to Dogmad600

Sorry, It can happen quite often and it is hard and inconsiderate.

All I can really say it is His Loss, however you are best to know now what He was about that finding out further down the line in the relationship.

Be kind with yourself and slowly move on in live and its adventures. You will feel that much better when you understand the positive implications of this understandable loss.

You will find someone else and move on, eventually you will look at the past sadness as a part of your learning experience and you will find that right person who is waiting to meet you

BOB

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to

Thanks

Solow87 profile image
Solow87

I've just noticed your post. I'm sorry about your breakup. And the added hurt you're now bearing. Especially as he's moved on so quickly.

How long had you been together? Were there problems at all? Hugs.

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to Solow87

7 years nope

Solow87 profile image
Solow87 in reply to Dogmad600

Aw. A very long time then. Was the way he broke it off respectful (as in how you were told? Was he wary of much it would hurt you?) Do you know this new woman? Sorry for all the Qs, trying to help understand/share your pain.x

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to Solow87

No to all

The grieving of a breakup is hard especially after you invested 7 years.

Cry it out, it’s okay to not be okay with things right now.

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to

Thanks

Solow87 profile image
Solow87

Damn. So sad. What an ar**hole!! You deserve better dogmad! I feel for you!

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to Solow87

Thanks

Solow87 profile image
Solow87 in reply to Dogmad600

Is there anything you like that could cheer you up? Take away some of the pain?

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to Solow87

Not really

Solow87 profile image
Solow87

Okay. Try and look after you, treat yourself. I'm sorry but at the mo he doesn't seem like he's worth wasting your tears on if he's willing to just suddenly give up on you and your relationship!

Do you have any family support?

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to Solow87

Nope parents died

Solow87 profile image
Solow87 in reply to Dogmad600

Aww I'm so sorry for your loss. :( :( :( Would you like to talk about them?

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to Solow87

Yes

Solow87 profile image
Solow87 in reply to Dogmad600

Okay. How long ago did they pass? And how old were you? I lost my dad at 16 and he was also an elderly man!

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to Solow87

Only six weeks ago aged 25

Solow87 profile image
Solow87 in reply to Dogmad600

😯 oh my. My sincerest sympathies!! Hugs! This really is too much for you to be dealing with!! 😔😔😔 May they rest in peace. 🌹🌹

What were they like, personality/character? Did you do lots of things together?

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to Solow87

Yes happy friendly

Solow87 profile image
Solow87 in reply to Dogmad600

Can i quickly ask, have you been able to access any bereavement support/counselling?

What work did they do? What was your favourite thing/s to do with them?

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to Solow87

Nope because of Covid but I do group video support Chats

Walks chatting hanging out

Solow87 profile image
Solow87

Are the "group video support chats" specifically for bereavement though?? Maybe give your docs a call and see if they can offer anything (extra)!

Did your parents work?

(Brb in 20ish mins)

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to Solow87

No they aren’t well peer support one covered it but others are worries and anxiety

Could try docs but scared too

Yes

Solow87 profile image
Solow87 in reply to Dogmad600

Then if you can please push and give them a call in the morn or 111 and let me know how you get on. I think your parents would want you to call them if they knew you were hurting so bad and need help.

What work did they do?

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to Solow87

Hospital nurse and doctor

And yes I’m scared too

Solow87 profile image
Solow87 in reply to Dogmad600

Well there you go! A doctor and a nurse! I think they raised a brave lady who can make the call. 😉 Do you want to try 111 now while I'm here chatting with you?

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to Solow87

No not now I will try my doctors in morning

Solow87 profile image
Solow87 in reply to Dogmad600

Okay shall i let you try and get some sleep? Or can stay on a little bit longer.

Solow87 profile image
Solow87 in reply to Dogmad600

Heyy did you call docs? How are you at tho mo?

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to Solow87

I did yes they are going to set up virtual counselling for me I’m still quite down in the dumps

Solow87 profile image
Solow87 in reply to Dogmad600

Well done. Glad you've done it, thats the first step out the way! :)

Have you had anything to eat yet? Any plans to go out?

Solow87 profile image
Solow87 in reply to Dogmad600

Dogmad??

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to Solow87

I have managed to eat some lunch nearly sicked it back up and no plans to go out have more group support video chats

Solow87 profile image
Solow87 in reply to Dogmad600

Oh dear. Hope you can keep it down. Glad you have other group chats to keep you going. Do you want to chat some more about your parents?

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to Solow87

Not really

Solow87 profile image
Solow87 in reply to Dogmad600

Okay. I'm here if you wanna chat.

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to Solow87

Sure

Social anxiety is the worst. I'm sorry you're dealing with all this.

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to

Thanks

sorry to hear that. everything will be okay💕

Simonesavesbees profile image
Simonesavesbees

I feel for you , I have just split up with my partner too after 6 years. I also suffer with anxiety and depression. Know that these feelings will pass and that the comfort of family and friends can support you through this difficult time x

Livinghappy profile image
Livinghappy

I am so sorry. It will get better. I have been through this too. I understand. Just keep reaching out and talking about your experience. Give yourself time to heal.

Analyse_Chris profile image
Analyse_Chris

It’s excruciating at the beginning. It feels as if it will never get better but it DOES and it WILL! Allow yourself to feel fully the emotions you are experiencing. Right now you are in the grief period, mourning the loss of the relationship and what “might” or “could have” been. Soon this will be replaced with a more logical sense that the relationship just wasn’t working or else you would have made it. In a few weeks you’ll learn to start investing in yourself again away from the relationship and day by day you’ll get better and stronger on your own! Take care and remember thousands of people suffer this loss every day. You are not alone!!!

N-cole profile image
N-cole in reply to Analyse_Chris

I always envy people who say it takes a few weeks. I got broken up with in January this year, after having dated since 2010. Everything is still fresh like it happened yesterday. Yes I logically know towards the end it wasn't working. But that doesn't help my feelings at all.

Analyse_Chris profile image
Analyse_Chris in reply to N-cole

I’m not suggesting that in 4 weeks time you'll just GET OVER IT. When I say a few weeks that could become months for some people (or years in your case). But these messages are to encourage someone who feels like their world is ending right now. I’m not going to say that there never going to feel better because that’s rubbish.

N-cole profile image
N-cole in reply to Analyse_Chris

Yes I understand that. I hope you know I was not trying to be negative or discredit what you were saying. I am just going through pain and was awed that some people can recover so fast. And it is good and needed encouragement you were providing 👍

Analyse_Chris profile image
Analyse_Chris in reply to N-cole

Not at all. I just didn’t want my meaning to be misconstrued as something it’s not. We all deal with grief and trauma differently and there is no set recovery time. Take care

It is important you gain some help from your GP, your family loses and the loss of your boyfriend of seven years can seem to be very harsh. Your Doctor should be able to get some Bereavement Councillor to talk out your loss and loss of your Long term relationship. Because of Covid Mental Health seems to be the poor relation at this time

What happened to your relationship with your Boyfriend, why did He walk away

BOB

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to

Another girl and yes starting counselling next week

in reply to Dogmad600

Make a written list of what you wish to cover and the problems associated in your Life.

This list will help you not to forget anything

BOB

Hello Dogmad

Good luck with your appointment if you want call us back and let us know how you get on

Good Luck and keep a hold A positive future will be waiting for you

BOB

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to

Thanks

Ddorne profile image
Ddorne

I’m so sorry. Most of us here have some kind of anxiety. It’s not easy. I’m sorry about your boyfriend. Do you have a therapist to talk to?

Dogmad600 profile image
Dogmad600 in reply to Ddorne

Will do next week

You may also like...

Me and my boyfriend broke up and I am miserable

Me and my boyfriend broke up 4 days ago and I really regret it and I'm so torn and sad I feel like I

Want to be with my boyfriend

than ours. bt i really love him. i can't stay away from him anymore. i can't even get out of my...

Boyfriend says I'm lazy and it's making me feel worse!!!

I'm fighting inside just to stop myself from topping myself,but in his eyes I'm just being lazy...

my boyfriend left me because of my mental health and I feel very alone

don't have great support from family either, at the start of it all they told me to just snap out...

I still wanna be with my ex boyfriend

for about 2 years now. And during that time we broke up twice, first time because he moved away and...