Help I feel so lost and lonely

[Diddly1981]

My husband has been in prison since July of last year and I’ve had a lot to deal with. I suffer with depression and anxiety. I had a blip where my heart started racing due to being on Amitriptyline. Was prescribed Propanol which has helped no end. Why I was so tired and achy was due to me being anaemic so I’ve now got iron medication. So hopefully I can return to work next week.

My husband has been moved to an open prison and he’s now been given his full book so he can go out and about and do proper paid work. He used to send me cards every week and text and call a lot when he was given a very basic mobile to use. Now he’s gone full throttle into work and I feel my children and I have been forgotten about. This whole journey has been awful. I just wish he’d think about his family a bit more. I don’t want to be a lonely wife when he comes home. He’s working as a chef and he’s fantastic at it. He was a chef before he went into prison and I’d started to feel lonely then. I’ve had to go bankrupt and all sorts on my own while he’s been away with no real support from his because of the circumstances. I think he’s taken on lots of work to impress now he’s under pressure from that. Now there is no time for his family again. I thought he could change. He’s due to come home for a visit for the first time tomorrow, but I’m very reserved about it all. He lied so much before he went in there. All of this has caused my depression and anxiety and he really doesn’t see that. I really needed to write this, sorry in advance for rambling on.

[MAS_Nurse]

Hi Diddly1981,

You have had to cope with an awful lot and your concerns are very real. It is often forgotten that when a loved one is in prison, it isn't only the prisoner who serves their sentence, but the family does too. Here is a quick list of helpful contacts that offer support to the families and it may be worth giving them a call or checking out their websites:

Support helplines for families of prisoners in UK: gov.uk/support-for-families...

Could you ask a close friend or family to be with you to support you when your husband visits tomorrow?

Can anyone else here offer some encouragement or advice for this member?

Take care, let us know how things are going.

MAS Nurse and Moderator

[Diddly1981 in reply to MAS_Nurse]

Thank you so much.

[Suzie40]

Hey, it's good to hear from you again. As MAS Nurse said, it's not just the prisoner who serves the sentence - the world gets put on hold for the whole family. I think I would be feeling how you are if I was in the same position x