BPH, retrograde ejaculation and mental ... - Men's Health Forum

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BPH, retrograde ejaculation and mental health (newbie post)


Hi guys, this is my first post.

I was diagnosed with benign prostatic hypersplasia last year and have been on several treatments since then, in an attempt to avoid their respective side effects. At the moment I'm on a combination of finasteride and prazosin, with a view to phasing out the prazosin once the finasteride starts taking effect. Previously I have been on tamsulosin and alfuzosin, separately.

I have told my GP that I am suffering from moderate to severe fatigue, which I am, and which sometimes makes holding down a full time job extremely difficult, especially one in which I am required to be physically active. I feel certain that this fatigue is a side effect of the drugs that I've been taking. But this is not even my biggest problem.

I'm finding it intensely difficult to deal with retrograde ejaculation, and I wondered if anyone else feels the same. I actually don't even want to think about spending the rest of my life being unable to ejaculate properly. What little I do produce is a watery dribble, and the majority of that has to be squeezed out after orgasm because I'm not shooting it. I don't know if other guys take this in their stride but I'm really struggling with it.

I'm also dealing with long term mental health issues relating to anxiety and depression. These have been around for many years but I have been seeing a therapist, on and off, for over a year. I was beginning to hope I might find a way of getting on top of it before the BPH kicked in. I have really tried to count my blessings, to consider how much worse things could be, and it works for maybe a few minutes, before my mind slips back into this feeling of despair that I can't shake off. I try to be logical about it, I try to tell myself that it's not the end of the world if I can't ejaculate, but I can't convince myself. I just can't handle it at all. I have mentioned it to my GP but I'm reluctant to do it again because he dismisses my feelings about it; he thinks it's only an issue if I want more children, which I don't, so he doesn't see it as a problem.

All my life I've never really made a habit of seeing my GP, and this past year or so I feel like I've never been away. Every time I go I think it may be my last visit there because I'm beginning to feel like a nuisance, wasting valuable GP time with something trivial and insignificant. But I'm going out of my mind and I feel totally alone with this. It seems retrograde ejaculation is both a symptom of BPH and also a side effect of treatment. Sometimes, especially when combined with the fatigue, I feel I don't even want to be around if this continues.

Please tell me there are others here who can relate to how I feel.

4 Replies

I have had retrograde ejaculation for many years. what it means to me is that I can become sexually aroused but when the climax is near I am not able or even have the desire to continue, what should be the climax is the opposite of that, a disappointment and a feeling of inadequacy, I am not able to enjoy an orgasm.

I made an appointment to see my Dr about retrograde ejaculation, I had put it off for along time thinking he would regard as something I shouldn't be bothering him about, that it was just vanity or egotism on my part. He wasn't sympathetic and gave me a prescription for Viagra.

It's difficult to make most people understand how something like retrograde ejaculation can be such a big problem, I went to my doctor about it and afterwards wished I hadn't, According to what I'd read on the internet there was treatment for it, if not a cure but it wasn't available on the NHS and my doctor clearly thought, as most people do, that it wasn't a serious problem. But it is for me and it's left me unable to enjoy sex. I can't imagine having a physical relationship with someone, I can become sexually aroused but when the climax is in sight I lose the desire and the ability to go on. When I am able to have an orgasm (about once every three weeks) it's the opposite of what is should be, not a pleasurable experience and a feeling of inadequacy.

He's one person who can relate very closely to your post. I'm not able to explain to my doctor the difficulty I have coming to terms with retrograde ejaculation. When I went to see him about it I was nervous and self conscious and put the point across very badly, the point is that what should be the best part of sex is actually the opposite, an anti-climax, so it's something to be avoided even though I have normal sex drive.

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