a living place

[Agara33]

I have been looking for the right home for me for many many years. Now I am in a sublet. In a few weeks I can start to look for the right house for me with everything that I need-location, garden, light or I can look for a place that is good enough to regroup in, to understand what is really best for me-and then do it from a clear place. Living here for the past few weeks I have noticed how lonely and exhausted I am-and how expensive it is to live alone...and maybe eventually it will be better with a room mate-maybe not, maybe it will be better to buy, i really have no idea....its become quite scary looking for places---people rent really awful places--and there are so many people looking...and i have to be aware of certain needs that I have-mainly light, space and location that is easy without car..i was just writing this out to see if anything comes to me--i guess just look and know that this apartment that i will find is a station-for me to figure out the truly right thing for me...i hope it will be simple.......i pray that it will be simple.

[LilyAnnepuppy]

I hope it works out for you. Sending positive vibes.

[BrainIsFull]

That sounds really hard, looking for a place. Maybe it would help to remember that there is no "perfect" answer. Getting a roommate saves on costs but having a roommate could be a drag. But it could also be nice not to live alone.

It's good that you have some time to regroup and think about what you want, what is feasible, what is necessary. And writing things out often helps clear your mind and maybe leadto some new reflections.

💚

[Agara33 in reply to BrainIsFull]

thank you

[Nathalie99 Partner]

Hi Agara,

Wishing you a lot of luck in your house search, after all you've been through, you deserve a sense of safety.

I would start a list of those things that are important for you and you can't compromise on. Then go through as many listings as possible, even all of them.

Next day, refresh all of them again and keep looking. When you find something, contact them asap so you can have a viewing.

I kept a list of all the addresses and pros and cons to every one of them.

I went through all of the listings, 300 or so, every day, took me hours each day. Persistence eventually pays off.

I went through this process a few times.

For me, home is very important.

Wishing you a lot of success...xx

[Agara33]

i think the things i really cannot compromise on are space, light and having the place be nice...maybe if i need a to get on a bus i can deal with it and if its not a garden apartment i can also deal....i want to believe and hope that the right apartment for me in this time is out there...theres someone i know who might want to room with me...i don't know if its right or wrong for now....i find making food for myself is hard and lonely and expensive, and fixing up a house of only my things is too...but there is only one person i know who i think could make a good flat mate.

[SavingGrace Administrator]

Hi Agara. I can empathise with trying to find the 'right' home. Rental properties where I am are hotly competed by tourist/second homes, as I moved to be close to my mother, which is close to the southern (sunny?) coast.

I've actually written several times to my MP, to highlight the plight of single persons seeking 1-2 bed properties in the area, when tourism/second home owners can snap up any such possibilities... and more recently, our country is on a drive to deliver on new homes for people, yet none seem to be affordable for first time owners, nor... for primary residents only.

I get triggered just trying to write about this actually. I'm not from a vulnerable background, just happened to have experienced trauma/PTSD. I have a masters degree. Yet here I am. I often feel that there has to be an alternative. There really does...

I hope that you find success in your place.

[misslillie]

Living situations are always a challenge and few if any are ideal. I live in a very old house inherited from my mother when she pasted away in 1999. I have been working and living four hours away for the past forty years. Therefore the house needs many repairs. But it is a roof over my head and I appreciate that!