Is this related to PTSD?

[Bciaap]

Hello! Sorry for this long post. I am usually an anxious and stressed person, always have been. My anxiety started to become a problem 2 years ago short after a car accident (it wasn't a serious one, I just had my arm broken). I started thinking that something bad is going to happened (usually crazy things, like strangers wanting to hurt me out of nowhere). A few months ago this thought went away. I guess I had other things to stress about (I finished medical school in summer and had my final exam in November). Anyway my life was looking the way I wanted to. Nothing to feel bad about.

In January I started working in the hospital and in the second week I had a very intense panic attack (I didn't see any bad cases, and I wasn't feeling stresed). It happed out of nowhere as I was waiting for a friend in a coffee shop. I felt chest pain, was very agitated, shaking. Since then I cannot stop thinking about having an heart attack. Medically I know it's not possible, but I cannot stop thinking about it (I am 25 years old, I have a normal weight and the only risk factor is smoking). Since than I started to smoke less, drink less coffee, eat healthier, sleep more, but I still don't feel good. I had a few other attacks since then (much easier to manage) and I feel strange (dizzy, my stomach hurts, feel like throwing up sometimes). Another strange thing that I feel is that sometimes I have the impression that I am living in a dream, that everything I see and I hear is faded and foggy.

I don't know why I feel this things all of a sudden. I have nothing to be unhappy about. I have support from family and friends. I live with my boyfriend and my car and we have a happy relationship. I realise that I have a psychological problem but I still cannot stop thinking that I am having an heart attack and I am gonna die. I also feel so ashamed that I generally have a good live and waisting it thinking of all the bad things that have a small probability to happen and there are people out there with so many problems that never complain. I also feel bad that after so many years of working hard to be where I am with my career, I cannot function at my full potential.

Can this be related to PTSD (even if the panic attacks started after almost 2 years, and I don't have symptoms like fear of being in a car, or flashbacks or nightmares about this (I know the classic symptoms and I I don't have any of them. I think that starting a new way of live (my job) and my self confidence problems (I always need reassurance about my judgement) could reactivate my anxiety. Is this possible?

And also do you have any suggestions and tips (maby little exercises) about what should I do to make things a little better? I feel like I identified the problem (it's more factors combined) but I am blocked and don't know how to manage them.

P.S. I am going to therapy in two weeks.

[Nathalie99 Partner]

Hi Bciaap,

Welcome to the community.

Panic attacks could be from PTSD.

They don't necessaily start from thinking, they start from triggering situations, like sounds, smeels or someone doing something that reminds of a specific traumatic event, even subconsciosuly.

I don't think it is something that can be "controlled" with thinking. It is not caused by negative thinking, it is a different part of the nervous system.

If they are caused by a traumatic event, then it might be helpful to have a trauma therapy at some point, if it gets too disruptive to be able to function fully.

I think each personal situation is individual and it all depends what is going on in our lives and how often they happen.

I understand that putting your career on hold could be terrible especially since you have worked so very hard to get the education. I think medical field is really tough and I admire you choosing your career.

I hope you can work through this in therapy and that the intensity of this will be much less.

I am not sure which therapy is best as it is individual but there are different options.

Wishing you success with your upcoming session...

[Bciaap in reply to Nathalie99]

Thank you for your response. I will start therapy in 2 weeks. I don't think it's going to be hard because I am a very outgoing person, and I don't mind talking about my problems (saying them out loud makes me see things from more angles. I kind of know where my problems come from (of course there are more factors combined). I hope therapy will help me understand why is this happening to me (I used to be a very strong person) and I also hope to find tips to manage all of this

[1Mechanic]

Hi, welcome to the board. I wouldn’t mind talking to you about the possible PTSD symptoms you are experiencing; however, in my humble opinion, and in my very humble opinion, I think you need to slow down first. Please do not be mad at me when I ask this. If I have offended then I am so deeply sorry.

By slowing down, I mean breathe. Take some deep breaths. I am saying this and expressing my very humble opinion to you because you sound very anxious, very worried, and very scared too. And that’s okay. You have been through several scary things and are currently going through something that is very scary. It’s okay. Breathe. Please just breathe. Take some deep breaths in. And a deep breath out. Breathe. Just stop whatever it is that you are doing. And breathe it in, then let it out. Try and slow down. Can we do it once more? Deep breath in. Deep breath out.

Breathing works best for me when I am very anxious. I have a very hard time focusing on current situations, meeting deadlines, just anything really. It’s hard. I need to stop what I’m doing. Take several deep breaths in. Slow the things down. And then I can go back at it.

Can you try this again? Breathe. Deep breaths in and deep breaths out. Try and slow some things down.

As you're slowing some things down, I would like to say that you are doing all of the right things. You have changed your diet, cut back on smoking, cut back on your caffeine, and you’re seeking help with therapy. Wow! Anyone of those is very hard. You’ve done all of them. Amazing! Congratulations!

Please take a few more deep breaths. I keep asking, because like I said, this is what helps me very well. I know it might sound crazy trying this for the first several times. Trust me. I remember. But, this really does help me. It helps calm my very scared and very anxious mind

Deep breaths in and deep breaths out. I would like to say that we could talk more about the symptoms you are experiencing; however, this is all very complicated and it might overwhelm. It takes time to digest things. It takes time to grasp things. It takes time to take everything in.

Calming my anxious and scared mind helps me focus on things now. Also, it helps me to understand the complicated things of then. Of the past. Of the scary things I have survived. It helps me to understand why I feel the way I do. Why I act the way I do. It helps me put it into perspective per se. It helps me to better understand what has happened to me and how I can live my life now

That’s why I am asking, in the most humblest way I can think of, to breathe. To try and slow those thoughts down. To try and relax your very tired, scared and anxious mind.

Breathe. It’s okay. You’re gonna be okay.

[SavingGrace Administrator]

Hey there. I support everything that my forum colleague has spoken of...

It's understandable to have these triggers now, despite the traumatic event having ended....

When/how do we get closure and healing and recovery!? I think this can be so different for everybody. And I would also say that different therapies work well for different people!

I've recently started fearing heart attacks - because this is in my maternal genealogy. And it also feeds into my PTSD narrative (which is another long story). So I agree with others, that learning to breathe and take oneself out of that pattern of thought is going to be really helpful and productive for you right now.

Do you enjoy walking or swimming or anything in the great outdoors?? Somewhere, where you can *just* be 'you' and 'the world'...

I think that's the key.....

for me, that means no expectations.

But, for you, it might mean though, a place where there are no dangers created from other's .

Sorry - am just throwing out ideas here.

and yes, P.S. My panic and real anxiety attacks started nearly 20 years after my original traumatic incident. At 25 I was suddenly living away from my cosy family and faced with bridges to cross that I could not cope with (emotional bullying for example).... and the panic/anxiety attacks got really bad.

I manage them to this day...

good walks in the peaceful outdoors, with my adopted collie dog. That's all I need to bring me back.... as well as knowing that my ma understands, hears, listens to me.... just someone ... x

And eventually, my sense of safety has returned... and I'm really finding my feet again and seeing that gorgeous, good ole self again rise and meet the day....

Someone, who i once thought/feared had gone forever. But that was just depression, at its worst, speaking.