Newly Joined and Need Help Pronto

[Owonder]

Hiiiiii! I newly joined this community! I just escaped an abusive situation with my household. Am learning to admire my strong qualities that set me free! Now am physically in an environment where there is more toxicity and hidden abuse. Every time I feel that I'm on the bottom, I think of what brought me to the top. Right now it's tough because I am in another abusive environment and it's not right. As you can imagine always on EDGE. Am seeking to get therapy btw, but am interested in what you guys have to say. Thank you!

[peacefulandcalm Encourager]

what a beautiful photo, that is lovely... I get it very well what you just wrote. I relate very much...

what brought you to the top? was it a combination of things?

that is very good you can think on that when you feel low....good to remember...

yes, completely get 'always on edge', I get it.

I hear you and I hope others have helpful things to say, I know they will....very supportive here, glad you are here...<3

[swordfishll in reply to peacefulandcalm]

I think it’s amazing that you left your abusive situation, it takes strength. Message me if you want to chat, I’m in a similar household

[Owonder in reply to swordfishll]

Thank you Swordfishll! ( I'm still learning about this website as well as messaging. Cant bet on messaging you right now cause I'm still learning. Thank you!)

[Owonder in reply to peacefulandcalm]

Thank you for the warm welcome Peacfulandcalm. I appreciate that. I think it is wise to constantly reflect on the fact that you are in overcomer when going through more hurtful stuff. Just looking for a place to have my pain heard. I know Im strong and all the feedback may allow me to recognize it more. I just hope someone out there can relate to the pain. That deep, aching and very present pain residing in the deep. And yes, behind the ' strength'.

[Lindyloo53 Volunteer]

Hi Owonder and welcome to the forum. I hate it when people say why did he/she say and I say ask why he/she abuses them.Congratulations on getting yourself out of the first abusive place.

I’m unsure where in the world you are but where I live we have women’s refuge who work with survivors of violence of any kind. Abuse is violence. Women’s refuge have safe places to accomodate women and workers to help them access other supports like income support and housing, clothing and helps them access counselling if they are not able to offer it themselves because of workload issues. I’m wondering if there is a similar organisation where you Live?

I think you’ve done an incredible job getting out of the first situation.

[Owonder in reply to Lindyloo53]

Awwww thanks. I will definitely look into Womens Refuge in my area. The only struggle is I have had organizations turn me down from help because my situation was not ' domestic violence'. 😥 So it is hard looking for that kind of help when you were turned down so much

[Lindyloo53 Volunteer in reply to Owonder]

Owonder, if they turn you down ask them where else they can recommend. They well here they are a feminist organisation and would want to ensure you were helped by someone and refer you on. I’m wondering about places like Salvation Army too you wouldn’t need to be of their faith or of any faith to seek and receive help from them, they normally have social workers attached to their community services and sometimes have emergency accomodation where I live. Just thoughts.

[Owonder in reply to Lindyloo53]

Oh okay. Thank you

[Shy_Guy]

Welcome to the group. I am sorry you are still in an abusive environment. I also lived in a very abusive environment with my parents but even when I grew up and moved out I tended to attract people to abuse me.

It is good to hear that you might get some therapy because that is the way that I changed enough to stop attracting abusive people. I only knew one way to live and therapy opened the door to many other possibilities. I am not saying it is all fixed but I learned what a healthy relationship looked like and what an unhealthy relationship looked like so I felt I could make healthier choices.

There really is a way out. It will take time but there is always a way to improve the situation. I hope to hang with us for awhile.

[Owonder in reply to Shy_Guy]

Thanks for reaching out! I understand. And I'll be hanging with you guys 🙂

[Nathalie99 Partner]

Hi Owonder and welcome.

I'm really sorry that you found yourself in another abusive situation. It is a huge thing that you were able to move out of the first abusive home. It's really hard to escape and find suitable accommodation.

I think having a safe place to live is going to help you create a foundation for healing and finding yourself.

Do you have any organizations in your country that help with practical steps in finding a safe place to live? Having even a small studio can make a huge difference to be able to start feeling safe and not having to have a constant threat.

I know that it might be harder right now because of Covid but I think your safety comes first and if you are in immediate danger then it's better to call a hotline and arrange a place to stay until you are able to find your own place.

I'm sorry you are living in such a threat.

Sending support and strength.

[Owonder in reply to Nathalie99]

Thanks for your concern. That is actually where I am now: taking action to have a peaceful environment 😉.

[freeandalive1 Volunteer]

Hello and welcome! Isn't it wonderful that you can now recognize a toxic situation. Are you making plans to remove yourself or is that even an option? I hope you are able to navigate those waters and take good care of yourself. Welcome to HealthUnlocked.

[Owonder in reply to freeandalive1]

Thank you. I am making plans to remove myself and also reaching out to a supportive community. 😊

[freeandalive1 Volunteer in reply to Owonder]

You've found a great support community! Welcome