New member struggling : I am new here and right... - Heal My PTSD

Heal My PTSD

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New member struggling

Pixels12345 profile image
17 Replies

I am new here and right now I’m really struggling atm.

Is anxiety depression and CPTSD my whole life. I tend to do OK until I have major stressors and right now I have major stressors going on in my life. I’m seeing a therapist and I have been for a while and right now it doesn’t feel like it’s enough for me. I don’t have anybody to turn to you for real support regarding mental health issues and coping skills.

On top of a major stressors I have going on the holidays are coming up and I don’t have any relationship with my family because their severely abusive. The holidays are hard enough without all this other stuff going on and I just feel really alone right now.

My anxiety is raging and I keep struggling was ruminating. I made a doctor appointment to get back on some meds and I can’t get in for two weeks and I don’t feel like I can make it through that two weeks.

I’m hoping to find some support.

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Pixels12345 profile image
Pixels12345
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17 Replies
SavingGrace profile image
SavingGraceAdministrator

It's really great to be able to welcome you to this forum, Pixels12345 and I'm glad that you have found this nurturing and nourishing place to find like-minded people who know where you may be coming from and can lend their support.

You mention a therapist, which is great, though it must be hard to have to wait 2 weeks until you find medication support also.

With holidays arriving, I'm sorry to hear how you are feeling. Expectations at this time can be tough; being enough can be tough. Yet that does not mean that this year you can not create a new beginning in terms of what is enough for you right now. Consider that this year, being enough - in terms of what you need - is enough. Regardless of the judgements, anticipations or expectations that can be placed upon us - they are just that: general rules of play that we are meant to accord and adhere to when we are at our best. But what of us when we are no longer at our best? That's the story I wish to hear and learn more about - how can we remain strong and wise and compassionate and included, when even our own world is crushed??

I hope that you find a good, strong sense of inner belief in your self right now, in order that you can rely more deeply on that inner core being that you know you do have.

Taking it easy on oneself is the most primary and most important step to take throughout.

There is actually NO expectation other than maybe, as in my case, feelings of guilt for letting others down. Yet this can take time to adjust to and realise that it really is just ok to be our selves; to not feel pressurised and hopeless.

Any other illness is easy - by society standards - to acknowledge and make room and way for... a broken arm has a bandage which others can sign their names on! A cold lends us to take to bed and be giving comfort through hot toddy's and hot water bottles. Bereavement, even, or paternity lends our employers to give us paid time off. Yet for many, still, mental health is an issue that is just not understood nor gauged correctly within society.

Finding support here is a great step - it has changed my world and helped support me from being afraid, to empowered to accept my health as a central part of who I actually am right now. And that this is ok. It's ok.

Wishing you all the very best and sending my blessings to you.

Pixels12345 profile image
Pixels12345 in reply toSavingGrace

Thank you for the warm welcome your kind words and your helpful insight

Pixels12345 profile image
Pixels12345

Thank you for the warm welcome your kind words and your helpful insight

Shy_Guy profile image
Shy_Guy

Welcome, figuring out triggers is a biggy. Learning what to do when it happens is the another

Pixels12345 profile image
Pixels12345 in reply toShy_Guy

Heavy stressors atm are a trigger and had a very triggering event w narc family a couple of weeks ago.

Luckily my doc got me in for tomorrow. Woot!

I don’t tolerate SSRIs or SRNIs well.

Not sure there’s anything else that can be prescribed for quelling anxiety attacks...

Xanax isn’t cutting it and I don’t like taking them constantly at all.

Pixels12345 profile image
Pixels12345 in reply toPixels12345

Coping is hard as I loose all interest in things I like to do when my anxiety/ptsd are raging.

I feel like it takes Herculean effort just to take care of my dogs and do very basic daily things.

Lame I know but everything’s exhausting me atm and I’m not doing my normal full routine atm.

waylay profile image
waylay in reply toPixels12345

That's not lame at all - I struggle to eat when I'm at my worst. You're going through a really hard time, and struggling to cope is a perfectly reasonable reaction! Please don't blame yourself - think of how you'd treat someone you care deeply about if they were going through this, then treat yourself that way. We're here.

TheBooG profile image
TheBooG

I fighting the same thing, I just hope to come across someone who understands what I’m going through

Pixels12345 profile image
Pixels12345 in reply toTheBooG

I do.

You’re not alone!

summersimmer profile image
summersimmer

Hello! I'm also new here. I also have trauma and hate the holidays because I feel like my family and I are just pretending that we're a family (my father was abusive and my mother was complacent). Sorry for making this about me but I just wanted to let you know that I can sort of understand how you're feeling.

If you ever need help with anything, please feel free to message me. Take care! <3

Pixels12345 profile image
Pixels12345 in reply tosummersimmer

I didn’t take it as you making it all about you.

Often if there’s a shared experience that somebody else will understand, we want to share our experiences/thoughts/feelings. :)

Very few ppl get family trauma/extreme family dysfunction. :).

Ty.

You too.

<3

summersimmer profile image
summersimmer in reply toPixels12345

Thank you! I get anxious in social situations so I was quite worried.

Pixels12345 profile image
Pixels12345 in reply tosummersimmer

Ah.

I do too. Question and doubt everything and overthink everything I say/do.

However, you’re good! :)

I am new here too, but it sounds to me like you’ve come to the right place. Welcome!

Ya might want to scroll down from here to “Topics” under “Pinned Posts” There’s gotta be something there to ease the stress you’ve been enduring...

Nathalie99 profile image
Nathalie99Partner in reply toIamnothingandnoone

Thanks for this excellent suggestion, Iamnothingandnoone.

There is also a search option in this community from Posts page.

Iamnothingandnoone profile image
Iamnothingandnoone in reply toNathalie99

🙂

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