Instant Dropout by a Recent PTSD (PTSD)

[michael_frye]

I can't take it anymore. These colleagues triggered me eventhough I just warned them. I didn't expect them to react in such ways. Lecturers also gave 10 marks questions with 2 days submissions due in the midst of 4 projects. These pressures just added more tensions in my mind to step out of degree.

My hair loss is so intense, and my body size is literally half than before. This is because I don't have the mood to eat anything and even drink. Please stop this torture God. I don't even want it and can't even change it.

I just spent 4 hours started at 1 am, to write a formal letter to my faculty dean for a dropout. Summing up my whole problem drained so much energy, but it's worth it compared to my undescribable sufferings that no one's gonna fully understand and feel.

With all due respect to everyone, thank you for supporting me to stay in degree, but fate writes itself too sometimes. 🧸

[AnxM]

I’m sorry to hear you’re struggling so much.

There’s nothing wrong with taking a break to take care of yourself- mentally snd physically.

If you want, you can ask for a break rather than drop out completely.

Take care.

[michael_frye in reply to AnxM]

True, I should've focused on my health mentally and physically above else. I've met lecturers and colleagues who 100% really didn't care other people's health and wellbeing. They just force you with work even when you're sick. With my conditions and problems, I don't think it's relevant for me to stay. These have shown me that I'm hurting myself if I stay.

I may change my mind but if I ever want to hurt myself ever again. Life is not all just about degree, I will find other ways to live. If I was wrong, which is doubtedly, then it will not be fair for those people who can't even step into degree. Am I right? If I'm smart enough to enter degree, then it's a proof that I can find other alternatives to live too.

Thanks for your wish, and I really hope you're doing fine too. ❄

[Lindyloo53 Volunteer]

Hi Michael=Frye. Owning our decisions is most important. It’s your right to drop out if that is truely what you want. I’m not sure where you are but is this something you could come back to in the future if you so desire?Huge weight loss like you have had can be responsible for massive hair loss. It sounds like a medical appointment might be worth while to check this out.

You have mentioned mood being responsible for you not wanting to eat or drink. It’s also possible you may be suffering with depression as that is another symptom of ptsd. The good news is that depression is a very treatable illness. This is another very good reason to see your doctor. Mine are suggestions only. I’m not a doctor so cannot diagnose.

I have had similar symptoms which were depression related and with medication and therapy I feel as back to normal as possible.

I wish you well on your journey.

[michael_frye in reply to Lindyloo53]

I'm thankful for the caring opinions of yours. I'm almost never read/heard these words from my family and friends, they mostly rejected me and thought I was not being serious.

I'm truly happy with my decision, I'm the kind of person who benefits a lot from living alone. Lecturers and group projects (with colleagues) are just slowing my studies and they make me lose interests in most studies. I don't think employee fits me. Online classes/lectures mostly urge students to study on their own then ask questions during meetings. With all being said, not everyone knows how someone learns and not everyone is the same.

For your peace of mind, I have big plans ahead that I've planned so well. I take this as how my adulthood starts, and I'm glad with it.

Thank you for the wish, and I wish you a whole wellness too. 🪔

[AnxM in reply to michael_frye]

If you know what you want, go for it. I wish you all the best. But first, take care of your health. Maybe get some blood tests done. Thyroid issues amongst many other treatable conditions can cause weight loss and mood issues.

[Nathalie99 Partner]

I am very sorry for this outcome, michael_frye.

I know how it's like being pushed beyond any limits and going through unbearable situations. I can relate to what you are saying.

.....

You are right, nobody can fully understand another person but sharing can help, when someone says "I hear you".

....

It doesn't mean the end of your career. It is possible to change them or start education when you feel better.

Being able to get through triggering situations without getting traumatized would make a lot of difference.

I hope you find something that you are good at and enjoy doing.

Sending support.

[michael_frye in reply to Nathalie99]

It's okay, I don't blame anyone.

I'm happy that I know what has been hurting me. When it gets to the point where no one respects you except yourself, then that is the point where no one has the rights on your decisions.

I'm glad that I have the courage to stand alone for my decisions where no one fits my shoes, and with all these school lives, I've been standing alone too.

This is the time when I unlock my cage and start to chase my passion and dream.🌍

I'm thankful that I get to see a person like you who cares, it really settles me.