The most wonderful time of the year !? 😁 🤔 😪

[Poohbear76]

So they have us believe ..... The adverts on television the pre Christmas sales... The hype the build up the expense ...

Me I always feel like it amplifies the depth of personal loss. Unfortunately family members who are no longer here. Relatives who were important to you and constant advertisements depicting the " perfect" family christmas. The stress placed upon " perfect" Christmas tree ? new sofa ? Christmas jumper anyone ? Or maybe a stuffed root vegetable with a face ?

I am a chronic pain sufferer along with a cPTSD diagnosis and I want to share what I prioritise as Christmassy this year.

I am aware of the families who are living in poverty in the UK in 2019 ! The people living in the streets in 2019 in the UK. The loneliness some of our elderly feel day after day but especially this time of the year.

The charities who offer a lifeline a Christmas dinner a child a gift. These are what I am going to be a part of. I am going to play it forward. I am not rich but I have a little to pass on. I will concentrate on donating a few gifts for children who have little or nothing. I am going to buy a homeless person something to eat. In doing this I am hoping it Will encourage me to focus on how fortunate I am.

My depression usually overwhelms me especially since my parents have passed away. The anniversary off my mother's death was yesterday as was the birthday of my father. I am a survivor of childhood abuse I am allowing myself to reflect upon my childhood. I am going to try to do a little good for the people who have less than I do.

This is surely what a "perfect" Christmas should look life ?

[Beingindependent Volunteer]

You’re giving yourself A true gift to see Christmas for what it is giving to a homeless person giving to a child that’s really the meaning of Christmas that’s wonderful that you say that

I’m sorry for all the loss that you’ve experienced and how it brings you such sadness life is difficult

I’m sorry for the pain that you experience daily I hope that you can express the joy that you have with others and I hope that you find joy, laughter and kindness for yourself in nature, music and friendships.

I’m sorry that you’ve experienced so much.

You understand the true meaning of Christmas.

[Poohbear76 in reply to Beingindependent]

Thank you for you lovely words they mean a lot to me. I have a family of my own now and again a great deal of pride from them. They will all be home for Christmas day even though my eldest is 23 years old.

I have experienced a lot sometimes I wonder how I survived but I did all be it with scars.

I am quite excited to be able to make a small difference to someone's life.

Your so right Christmas should be inclusive of everyone no matter how old, homeless , poor or what !

Christmas has a certain amount of magic especially for young children this is beautiful.

[Hidden]

I agree with a lot of what u said. Everyone seems to forget about others not so fortunate and worse off than ourselves.

For me..all the xmas music BEFORE freakin xmas..makes me out of my damn mind,lol

We cant even get through Halloween without being bombarded with Thanksgiving and Xmas and New Years...and then they are shoving Valentines Day down our throats right after New Years.

All these holidays do is put stress on me,that in turn gives me Episodes..lays me up in bed longer..till I recover..makes my severe chronic pain worse..and depression hits the roof.Oh..add my other med stuff to that..thats NOT "The most wonderful time of year" to me and probably others who suffer like me and u.

Now.. what I do is..turn everything into one big joke,just to get me through it all.

For starters...xmas time I take a line from my favorite movie "ELF" and consistently find ways to say "son of a nutcracker"...even when not needed or appropriate timing, lol

Oh.. for Thanksgiving..Im changing it up to …."Son of a sweet potato"..and Im on the fence with "Son of a pilgrim". Oh.. also cant wait to get out and dust off my turkey hat.It literally is a turkey on my head,lol I love the eye rolls I get,lol

Either way..sending hugs to everyone here on HU..cause we are all gonna need it with these damn holidays,lol

[Poohbear76 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you for you reply the holidays are depicted as a postcard dream which makes reality look at best a bit grim 😒

[SavingGrace Administrator]

Christmas is always a time about giving - and for me, about remembering the birth of a Saviour whose very core values were about just that.

Gifts at Christmas are for children who have yet to spiritually mature and accept that the best gift of all is what we have inside of us..... and that we have each other.

It's great to hear that you are following this mantra or path....

I could not imagine Christmas without my mother and I hope that one day, when that time comes, I shall be like you - reaching out still and thinking of others - at the most wonderful time of the year <3

[Poohbear76 in reply to SavingGrace]

Thank you. I am so happy that you experience a living relationship with your mother.

Mine was a cruel abusive alcoholic. But I have five children who I enjoy a close loving relationship with.

I get really upset at the poverty children are still experiencing no child should be without a gift Christmas morning.

I hope it have a wonderful Christmas x

[Poohbear76 in reply to SavingGrace]

*loving*

[Shy_Guy]

You are an inspiration. It sounds as though you know the spirit. The US has forgotten what loving one another means. Meanness is every where.

I believe kindness is catching and I chose to be kind to everyone, no matter what color, religion, sex or any other thing that makes them “seem” different than I.

I am not able to do the things you say but I can choose to be kind to the people I meet.

[Ardraven]

I've never yet managed perfection in anything but I don't see that as a reason or an excuse to stop trying. Yours is the best Christmas by my standards that I've ever heard anyone planning, in terms of what would make me feel fulfilled.

And as for relevance, what could be more appropriate to mark the official birthday of the guy who told his followers to give what they had to the poor and love others as much as themselves.

By either standard seems bang on to me

[Poohbear76]

I truly don't believe that perfection exists as most people may look for it in things they own or tasks they undertake.

I have looked perfection in the eye five times in the faces of my newborn children. A perfection so beautiful it took my breath each and every time.

I am truly humbled to be given such precious beings that I honestly adore. Love is a beautiful thing and the small child version of me had none. That's truly horrendous. The grown me had love in abundance something I could hardly dare to believe or imagine as a young child.

Learning to love myself enables me to love others and for that I am beyond grateful.