How to trust my psychologist?

[purebliss]

I have trust issues, it was sort of a decision I made when I was 13 years old: "Trust no one". It has kept me very much alive till now. I have been through many therapists in the past, the therapies all have not worked so well because of my lack of trust in them. How do I trust my psychologist, so that treatment can work well for me? He suggested Prolonged Exposure Therapy or Cognitive Processing Therapy. Any advice?

[Hidden]

Talking helps lots of it before you start any treatments it helps break down barriers! I didn't trust my therapist at the beginning I put on a mask and wouldn't let him see the true me! Until one day he had a female student to listen in I don't know if I felt safer because she was there but I broke down in tears and sobbed my heart out 😢 We didn't do out Imaginal Exposure therapy until he thought I was ready! It was where you closed your eyes and spoke about the trauma as though you were reliving it! Really frightening to begin with but as the weeks went by it got less and less! Then I was able to speak about it without getting upset 😊Talk to him make sure your ready before you do this you are the one that must say you want to do it he cannot pressure you! If you feel your ready Hun do it but if not wait xxx big hugs for you xxx

[purebliss in reply to Hidden]

Thank you Hidden . How often were your sessions?

[Hidden in reply to purebliss]

Hi purebliss my sessions were every two weeks to start off with then after 6 sessions he put them to weekly we just talked about general things about me to begin with so I could learn to trust him then when we went weekly, he slowly got me speaking about being ill in hospital then after another8 weeks he asked me if I wanted to take it to another level which would be one and a half hour sessions of the IET 😊X

[Hidden]

I totally understand. It makes sense that you wouldn't trust anyone when you had to make the decision to survive and those around you were probably less than trustworthy, I made the same decision when I ran away from home at 15 and was surrounded by people who honed in on my weaknesses and took advantage of me. I think that you should keep looking for the right therapist, who you feel intuitively won't screw you over... I was lucky to find some one who was empathic and who I knew below all my distrust had no reason to lie to me and genuinely wanted the best for me. Hang in there and have a little faith, some times its all that has got me through. xo

[purebliss]

Thank you. I feel like I have finally found someone who can work well with me. But partly I am scared because he is male. Any ideas on how to overcome that fear?

[Hidden]

Explain to him how you feel and ask if it was possible to have a female present maybe a student just until you feel comfortable being alone with him. I'm sure he would understand X 😊

[purebliss in reply to Hidden]

maybe not Hidden . It might make me feel more uncomfortable and distrustful. Thanks for the suggestion anyway.

[Hidden]

That's a tough one... mine is male too but gay so non-threatening. If you feel anything is off all I can say is listen to your intuition and take your time afterwards going through everything that was said. I always feel lighter and supported after my sessions ( mind you haven't got to the tough part yet!) but he always validates me and makes me feel like a normal person instead of the broken person I feel. Good luck and take good care

[Hidden]

That's a hard one for me to answer, Purebliss, since I learned not to trust anyone. A therapist mentioned to me a long time ago about prolonged exposure therapy, and it scared the heck out of me. (You mean I have to walk through a schoolyard and get rocks thrown at me again?? No thanks.) But then he told me I was making things up so I got out of there quick.

For me it usually takes one key sentence or a certain attitude from a therapist to make me get up and leave. I've had therapists who were steeped in their own arrogance. Some were racists. Some were just stupid. One went off into daydreams while the "patients" controlled the room.

I would like to tell you to go with your gut instinct, but as people with PTSD we can't really trust that, can we? I would say you MUST feel safe. Talk it out first.