When you're broken you want something fixed. There's a need for stability. There's a need for something to work. My world is so broken that I tried playing FIXER. It only made me feel worse. I must start with the woman in the mirror. Feeling like a mess.
Fix it: When you're broken you want something... - Heal My PTSD
Fix it
I am not denying your pain, but you have arrived at a life changing realization. Well done. Most people never do. The feelings are needed and are where new life emerges from.
I hope you will be compassionate with yourself on your journey.
Thank you for responding. I am learning to have compassion. It's difficult.
I can't tell u how much I relate to this right now. I feel a mess. Nervous wreck. Been looking for a new house for a long time and just can't find the right one it seems. Then my only relative I have a relationship with moved to TX and wants us to relocate there. I REALLY struggle with decisions as it is. Even small ones. The thought of a new house let alone relocating across the country with a new job is so utterly overwhelming. Then I feel weal for my indecision and lack of focus or direction. I'm always doing or learning about self improvement. Like u said I have a compulsion to FIX myself FIX what's wrong with me. But I'm starting to feel like maybe it's all putting too much pressure on myself always trying to be more and better. When will I just love and accept myself RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW for exactly where and what I am??! I yearn for outward stability but will prob never find it until I give myself the love and acceptance that my soul is really yearning for. Thanks for understanding !!
You're welcome Gemini!
Thanks ChilliDawg (love the name:).
Intellectually, i think I finally do believe the "I'm broken and need fixing" thought is the only thing that needs fixing. I'm hopeful I can change this story by offering myself unconditional love and acceptance. Not sure how that is the hardest thing to do but thank you for the reminder and perspective.
Thank you Stuck1