I know we are all different and we suffer this Fibromadness differently. I must admit I did not know what people meant when they said they could not get out of bed. I could. OK it hurt and it took forever to do anything, however I got up and got about. I felt a little proud about that fact and even thought that some people were just wallowing. And it is here that I apologise for that thought to everyone who has this Fibro thing. Yesterday I had a bad day. A really bad day. A day when if someone said do you want to be put down, I may just have said yes. A day when I could not get out of bed, I could not move, I could not do anything. So a huge apology and my smugness is now firmly back in its box. The problem with a lot of this is having the mental energy to carry on with life. Carrying pain around with you like a sack of potatoes is exhausting and when you have a few good days (well days when you can get around) and then a bad day comes and hits you on the head like an elephant in free fall, the depression it brings with it is overwhelming. That is the bit that is so difficult to explain to people. Most days I can laugh at it. I treat it like a monkey on my back. I refuse to let it rule my life. Yet sometimes it does. The monkey wins and all I can do is lay down and let it play. Still today it has eased up and today I am able to spend a little time here at the computer and attempt to change my working life so can earn a living. So here is to all our monkeys, and learning to live with them if we cannot get rid of them.