Just moaning ( sorry )

I have had a really bad day. In so much pain just need to sleep but school holidays are here kids are bored and I can't do anything with them 😢 It's hard to watch my kids doing nothing on the holidays ( the big one doing his GCSEs now ) but my body just wants to stay in my bed and do nothing. Just don't understand why this is happening ??

Being a mum of 4 ( me and my husband separate in 2012 due to DV ) my two older ones help out when they can ( they both work ) the two small ones are at school. I used to be a busy person running around now OMG I can spend days in bed. Can't move due to pain and it's really getting me down now. I say to myself I'm going to get up and do something but my body tell me NO way. Can any one reading this help me in any way to understand why I can't do anything ??

So so sorry for moaning like this but I just fell like my life is passing me by and I can't do anything to change it.

Thank you Linda xx

11 Replies

  • I know its difficult for you but I have learnt about a year ago - I must keep my stress levels down every time I got stressed (muscles tighten). I became bedridden - so I now make a massive effort to keep as chilled as possible - its very difficult sometimes but if I get stressed it can take my body weeks to recover - I now deal with life totally differently - I says to my boys - "look you know I can't get stressed". - and we discuss more -but they are grown now so its easier - also my diet plays a big part in my health - good luck with the school holidays x

  • Sorry about the DV -I had the same problem - divorced now - thank goodness ☺x

  • Hi

    Sorry to hear that your feeling so unwell. I know how you feel as I'm having a bad day too.

    Weathers bad so they can't play outside. Like you I've dragged myself out of bed today.

    How about having a pj day? I used to get thing in that they liked. Crisps, popcorn, mini sausages etc and put a rug on floor and let them get the food out and have an indoor picnic. Put a DVDs on and lie on sofa watching them and pretend to enjoy it too.

    I always had lots of craft things from the £1 shop for my children, for those days I was ill and they had to stay in.

    Hope you get through it ok.

    Try just to go with the flow, as stress will make it worse.

    Good luck and best wishes.

  • Hey , can i join in on the moaning ? I had to have one of my back teeth shaved down to a peg today in preperation for a crown , And something , i'm presuming it was the numbing agent has caused me to have a rather fast heartbeat all day causing me stress and worry . plus it's made my blood glucose levels spiral out of control 18,5 OWCH !

  • Oh Mahony I feel for you, I remember being just where you are 20 yrs ago & it's hard but you do get through it and things will get better. As some have already said, pace yourself, don't to more than you have to.

    I went swimming the other day with my daughter & grand kids & it nearly killed me, lovely the swimming bit, hated the drying & dressing & noise but I did it because Ithink you have to push yourself as much as you must rest. It takes time to balance things out and you will come to learn to do what you can, when you can.

    It's very hard when you have small children, wouldn't the older ones take them to the cinema or park so they get out.

    We used to put a big sheet on the kitchen floor and they would play with play doh & all the cutters etc. Or moon sand.

    Fatigue is one of the worse things with Fibro. I hope you soon feel better ☺

    Luv Jan x

  • I'm so sorry your feeling this way, try cutting yourself a bit of slack.Your not used to have the kids home all day and you most likely have some anxiety.I have been disabled since 2005 and had every day or 5 days a week to myself.My OH retired in January and I'm still going thru it.I had never even thought this would happen...it's hard.Give yourself a break as mental anxiety will pull your energy all the way down, ok?? Take care.Peck🐤

  • you know what, i've felt exactly the same today, everytime i try to get up to do something my body just says no, no you're not. go sit down or go to bed. it's really frustrating. i feel so bad letting my husband do everything and i feel like i'm putting on him insanely. but i have to start to understand i'm ill and there's nothing i can do about that. i have to accept it. i think the acceptance of fibro is the hardest bit for me because i also have a mood disorder that tells me i must do things now, now, right now everything must be in the right place in order etc. but my body says no to that so i have to cope with the mood disorder telling me one thing and the fibro telling me another. i get so pissed with myself lol. gentle hugs. x

  • Hi Mahoney0719

    I am so genuinely sorry to read this my friend and my heart genuinely goes out to you. I wish I had a magic wand so I could make it all better for you! I can imagine the frustration and the guilt as you cannot do what you want to do with your children. Please do not be too hard on yourself as you are not well and it won't help you feel better if you bring yourself down. Please take care of yourself my friend.

    All my hopes and dreams for you

    Ken x

  • Absolutely no need to apologise for feeling the exact same as most of the members of this wonderful site! I know exactly what you're going through Linda, and funnily enough have just posted a list of my "can't do these anymore" ! ! It's sooo difficult with young children, isn't it, they have the energy and speed of the bionic man/woman, don't you agree! ! I just look at my son and I'm worn out! lol! Moaning is good, I reckon anyway, it let's it out, instead of keeping it stressed inside! ! Take care, kind regards Esined x

  • Hi Mahoney 0719

    I hope you're feeling slightly better today.

    With Fibro or any other chronic illness, part of coping is in the planning. I know its almost impossible to plan for the unexpected but I think its a little easier to plan for school holidays which are agreed at the start of the school year.

    You mentioned that you had two older working children who are very helpful. Far be it for me to tell you what to do but may I suggest that they are encouraged to split the holidays between them to 'undertake activities' with the two younger ones.

    My brother, sister and I had to do the same for our two younger sisters and if anything, it made us more responsible and caring adults (now parents ourselves).

    It will take a great deal of pressure off you and will encourage the older ones to bond with the younger ones. I'm assuming the one doing the GCSE may not be too keen to do much until the exams are over but the odd movie or go cart/climbing wall or cycling would not go amiss.

    I hope you're not offended by my suggestions - I'm just speaking from personal experience.

    All the very best going forward.

  • Thank you so much for your kind words and I'm not at all offended by your suggestion in a way your right 😘 Planing to take them to the movie tomorrow.

    Thank you xx

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