A very good story

[Fibrofoggiest]

There follows a poem of sorts written by Cecil Rajhandra as a challenge of censorship, funny but a pertinent example of the "Nanny State" taken to its natural end.

THE ANIMAL AND INSECT ACT

Finally, in order to ensure absolute national security they passed the Animal and Insect Emergency Control and Discipline Act.

Under this Act, buffaloes, cows and goats were prohibited from grazing in herds of more than three. Neither could birds flock, nor bees swarm ........ this constituted unlawful assembly.

As they had not obtained prior planning permission, mud-wasps and swallows were issued with summary Notices to Quit.Their homes were declared subversive extensions to private property.

Monkeys and mynahs were warned to stop relaying their noisy morning orisons until an official Broadcasting License was issued by the appropriate Ministry. Unmonitored publications and broadcasts posed the gravest threats in times of a National Emergency.

Similarly, woodpeckers had to stop tapping the morse-code messages from coconut tree-top to chemo aka tree. All messages were subject to a thorough pre-scrutiny by the relevant authorities.

Java sparrows were arrested in droves for rumour-mongering. Cats (suspected of conspiracy) had to be indoors by 9o'clock. Cicadas and crickets received notification to turn their amplifiers down. Ducks could not quack, nor turkeys gobble during restricted hours. Need I say, all dogs, -- Alsatians, dachshunds, terriers, pointers and even little chihuahuas -- were muzzled.

In the interests of security, penguins and zebras were ordered to discard their non-regulation uniforms. The deer had to surrender their dangerous antlers. Tigers and all carnivores with retracted claws were send directly to prison for concealing lethal weapons.

And by virtue of Article 4, paragraph 2 (b) sub-section 16, under no circumstances were elephants allowed to break wind between the hours of six and six. Their farts could easily be interpreted as gunshot - might spark off a riot........

A month after the Act was properly gazetted, the birds as insects started migrating south and the animals went north and an eerie silence handcuffed the forests.

There was now TOTAL SECURITY !!!