Returning to work with exhaustion

[Spirit_in_the_night]

Hey lovelies 💛 I hope you are all doing well.

I had my Laparoscopy 4 weeks ago now (9th April) I was in theatre for around 3 hours and they removed a fair bit of endo.

I've felt really good since, only a little bit of pain & managing to do normal things - cooking, cleaning etc. However I have had to nap most days due to being so tired despite sleeping on a night.

Last week I had my first period since the op and tbh it was horrendous. The pain was worse than a normal flare up and it totally wiped me.

After being off since my op I go back to work tomorrow. I work in a care home for people living with advanced dementia and challenging behaviour. So sadly there isn't really any light duties. I went in this morning for an hour and half and was so tired by then that I came home and needed to sleep for a couple of hours. I can't afford anymore time off sick as I only get SSP.

I've started taking vitamins containing B12, and I also take iron tablets. I'm just so anxious and worried about how I'm going to manage 12 hour shifts at work. Especially as I work full time so do 33/44 a week. I've voiced my concerns to work, my partner & a couple of friends. They all say just do what you can, Which is my plan. But how does that work when I can't even manage a couple of hours?!

Apologies for the long post - I guess I just needed to get it all out. Not sure if I need advice or just someone to kick me up the arse 😂 but either way, thank you for reading xx

[maeloi]

Hi, don't worry, I was the same after my surgery. My first period was really bad, and unfortunately, I got readmitted because my ovarian artery ruptured as well, which they said was a complication of laparoscopy. I was off for a total of 6 weeks. During my first 4 weeks, I was always napping. I blamed it on my painkillers, but I realized it’s just my body coping. So, I tried to move more, gentle walking or 30-minute walks are allowed, and I did some stretching as well. I was so careful not to overuse my body though. Someone here told me to take it easy at work. Two months have passed, and I still get tired easily. I am taking a bunch of vitamins and Manuka honey to keep me well. I even subscribed to Lion's Prep so I can have a balanced meal. I work as a nurse, so it's not easy not to move at work. I would suggest you listen to your body. I know you will only get SSP, but can someone be able to help you while you extend your sick leave? Or speak to your manager; he or she might be able to help you by not giving you a heavy load? Please do not overexert yourself. Your body is still healing. My endo specialist told me that it will take 6 months for our body to recover fully after endo lap, so we need to be mindful of what we are doing. Lastly, people won't understand what you are going through until you tell them. Do not be afraid to communicate your needs. It happened to me as well. Again, it's your body; please take good care of it. You'll overcome it; that's for sure

[Spirit_in_the_night in reply to maeloi]

Thank you so much for replying. Yesterday I managed the 12 hours, however I was totally done after (and today!) I've spoken to my manager who is going to see if they can accommodate shorter shifts for me. I hope you are recovering well 💛

[BloomingMarvellous]

Our bodies take such different routes to heal and you’ve just had a major op. Endo also has all manner of weird and wonderful ways of screwing up your metabolism too which ops can’t fix.

All that said it would be totally worth seeing your GP and asking for a full hormone screen and metabolic check as there maybe something else hindering your progress. It’s possible to have more than one issue and one that maybe have be missed or misplaced because everyone puts it down to endo. I know that too well with recent endo episode putting me into hospital with severe flare and pain revealing I actually have a heart condition. It helps to know 😘

[Spirit_in_the_night in reply to BloomingMarvellous]

Thank you. I hadn't actually thought of that so I'll contact my gp and speak to them. I hope you're doing okay 💛

[BloomingMarvellous in reply to Spirit_in_the_night]

Thank you lovely ☺️

[Endolemon]

You might be eligible for UC while on SSP.

There is free benefit checker company Turn2us you can have a chat with or CAB.

I am 2 months post hysterectomy and still exhausted 💛Take care

[Spirit_in_the_night in reply to Endolemon]

Thank you, I'll have a look at that today. I didn't realise that could be an option. I hope your recovery is going well 💛

[HT267]

Hey, I had to have 3 mths off work to fully recover from lap. My surgery was 3 hrs aswell. I understand that financially you can't take anymore time off. I would look to see if there's other things you can cut down on for a short period of time so reduce socialising or household chores and delegate this do outside of work you prioritise rest 🤔 I was fatigued when I went back to work but was able yo do phased return I eidh you the best with your recovery x

[Spirit_in_the_night in reply to HT267]

Thank you for replying. Outside of work I don't do much anyways, it was more that whilst I was off I was able to do those things. Yesterday was difficult and today I'm in a fair amount of pain. I've spoken to my manager about reduced hours so hopefully this will help. I hope you are doing well with your recovery 💛

[Earthmother1]

Hi! My advice would be to try the progesterone only pill (desogestrel) as it stopped my periods. You could also try the mirena coil. My gynaecologist told me that having the endo lasered away doesn't resolve the problem as the endo keeps coming back with every period. So that's why she put me on desogestrel, it worked for me as it stopped my periods for 4 years and counting! Regarding work, you can only do what you can do, if you've got a supportive husband and family then lean on them for support and get yourself right, maybe a reduction in hours is necessary, but only to what makes you comfortable and is realistic for your living costs. I wish you all the best, and remember your body is recovering rest and being as stress free as possible is key.

[Spirit_in_the_night in reply to Earthmother1]

Thank you. They offered me the mirena coil but I declined. I might look at the implant ad that stopped my periods before. I've spoken to my manager about reduced hours for a while. I hope you are okay 💛

[Earthmother1 in reply to Spirit_in_the_night]

Your welcome and bless you🌷 I'm doing as well as can be expected, I've lived with chronic pain as long as I've been an adult, so it's my norm now. It's very sad as there's so little support for women with endo. Ive been diagnosed with ibs and irritable bladder, but of course it's related to endo! I'm now at perimenopause/ menopause age and that's thrown everything up in the air, because estrogen is part of hrt and endo feeds on estrogen so as a result I had a massive flare which lasted 2 weeks! So hrt is pushed to the side for now. I've also just been diagnosed with fibromyalgia, which I know I've had for the last 15 years, so I'm exhausted constantly, the exhaustion could be related to menopause though! Lol! The joys of being a woman! 💚

[Spirit_in_the_night in reply to Earthmother1]

We go through it as women don't we! I guess we learn to cope with it, as many doctors don't help with these issues as they should. Hopefully you're able to rest when you need to and take it easy 💛

[Cocoacupid]

hun I’m similar I work in healthcare with people with dementia learning difficulties and challenging behaviour. If you had excision surgery as are duties are heavy and not light duties I think you should have a bit more time off work. I’m having my excision and bowel surgery on Monday I was told not to work for at least six weeks but I may well have a few weeks annually leave after those six weeks. I like you will only get ssp which isn’t very much compared to my 36-38 hours . I don’t have a partner or anything and have mortgage etc and bills my pets running my car. I’m just lucky that I have been saving little by little to help me through this period. Also as o have annual leave lots left like four and a half weeks going to use some of that as well so at least I will then get normal pay rate. Rather than ssp . I’ve been saving with parents as I am probably autistic and being assessed for that a week after my surgery. I had to do this S am very impulsive. Lately though have been a lot more frugal. In some sense would rather see my pets have plenty than myself. Also was only getting things I really need not extras . I get paid weekly from my role which I find an awful lot harder than monthly pay as I have to make sure have enough for when my bills go out. Thankfully I sorted out when I pay my bills specially my mortgage a week I get just about enough to pay for that but had to aeperate other bills so not paying loads out all at once when quite a few times been living pay check to pay check.. I was advised even after my diagnostic surgery at least four weeks off after but had slightly more time off due to being in hospital for a week due to sepsis after my surgery. Take baby steps. I know sick pay isn’t great and I know the cost of living has gone right up as well. I understand the need to work but I would rather look at it like if I’m unable to drive for at least six weeks or maybe more after surgery then I’m not ready to go back to work as I like you do 12 hours shifts but I use hoists and other heavy equipment. As I have fibromyalgia I can only do contracted hours and not over time. I work 2 long days a week and then 2 shorter shifts which are still nearly a normal working day for most. As have doctors notes and things that backed me up as no way can I do over 38 as get extremely tired and then I’m on to burn out which is not good . So I do know my limits as it was just silly as some times I was put down to do 48 plus hours and I was for ever getting ill so I was know good to anyone in that position. Luckily I am In a small team and I have a good manager and good friends and parents who look out for me. But I get it’s hard with rising cost even for two household incomes and if you have pets or dependents it is even harder. Maybe see if you can have a phased return and see if you can do shorter days rather than 12 hours long shift. ? This has definitely helped me and I also have shifts spaced out and not too many together either. Have you got an occupational health specialist for your job in hr ? Or have you got a doctors opinion for phased return. If you have a phased return you can build up the hours over a time period instead of being warn out right away. Take care x

[Spirit_in_the_night in reply to Cocoacupid]

I'm sorry you're going through it all too. To be honest my surgeon wasn't great with communication. The hospital didn't give me a sick note or advise me how long I needed off so I had to go to my gp the next day to get a sick note. I spoke to my manager in the end and she has arranged shortened shifts for me. I did a 6 hour yesterday which was so much better. I was still really tired but it was so much more manageable. I hope it all works out okay for you 💛

[Cocoacupid]

thank you hun for your message back. I’m so so pleased that having spoken to your manager your on shorter shifts. 😊 that makes so much sense to do shorter shifts for a while instead of straight back in as your body is healing. I’m having to be careful as my surgery is on Monday and my blood pressure is through the roof. Thankfully though I have a supportive mum who was with me at my pre op and then I was able to see gp who gave me tablets so my blood pressure can drop to a normal range. Xx

[Esmeisthebest]

Regardless of your duties your employer is required to make reasonable adjustments for you as you will qualify as disabled under the equality act. If they could give you duties such as issuing meds, feeding patients, admin tasks, even changing beds or a period of phased return to support you then they should

[Esmeisthebest]

sorry just saw the first response 🫣🫣

[Spirit_in_the_night in reply to Esmeisthebest]

No problem, I appreciate you taking the time to reply x