Sorry for moaning again but I just don't know where to turn. I'm seriously over-emotional at the mo, crying at nothing and gettin annoyed by everything.
I'm sick of bein in so much pain all the time, I'm sick of not sleeping, I'm sick of falling out with people cuz im ratty and snappy, I'm sick of havin no appetite, I'm sick of this stupid disease and I'm sick of no-one helping me.
Really struggling at the mo and not sure how much longer I can carry on. I'm fighting everything constantly and I'm exhausted. How many times have I gotta go to A&E, see my GP/ consultant, pass out or throw up from pain and miss work before something is done to help me??
I'm not expecting to have surgery and my problems to be solved but it wud help. My consultant has organised a scan for me for 3 weeks tomorrow to see what's goin on with my endometrioma and then I've gotta go back and see him. He's not keep to operate for a second time, he'd rather just keep giving me more and more pills which I hate.
I'm trying to do my key holder training at work but I've been into Derriford A&E twice this week cuz I can't keep the pain under control. I've lost count of how many times I've missed work and I'm falling out with everyone at the mo cuz I keep snapping. My partner and work colleagues try to understand but cuz they're not havin to go through this they just don't understand.
I really don't know where to turn anymore. I hate bein like this, I hate the pain, I hate bein ill, I hate bein stuck in bed with my hot water bottles whilst my partner is out, I hate missing work and messing them around, I hate living like this.
I had 5 days between the end of my period and starting bleeding again even though I'm on the pill. My body is completely screwed and I'm acting like I'm 72 instead of 27.
How do other people manage to get the pain under enough control to sleep?? Amitriptiline isn't helping, neither are any of my painkillers, I can't keep running on empty cuz I'm gonna loose my job and my partner at this rate. I just wish someone cud make this go away for an hour.
Please help me, where do I turn?? I can't live like this.