Week 1, Run 1 - flopping aimlessly around like deranged thunderbird puppet

Let me introduce myself. I'm a fat, late 30s chap with two oversized feet on the end of skinny short legs and seemingly long flopping arms. (Should I fold them? In pockets?) I'm not designed to run. I don't really know what I'm doing.

I blame the olympics and the constant torch relay coverage.

So here we go, I'm about to step up for team GB and do some actual running! Yesterday, I went out and bought TK Max's cheapest trainers then found a dusty old unworn tracksuit in a bottom drawer. Today, I actually wore them. First thoughts: tracksuit bottoms actually skin tight, probably more accurately described as actual 'tights'. I've never worn them before, now I know why.

I can't remember the last time I ran. It was probably that day I did what can only be described as several mild skips as I attempted to run across the road to avoid an oncoming little street cleaner van. I've probably forgotten how to actually run. Worried I'll be a skipping, flapping, red faced idiot clown as my wide heavy feet slap the tarmac and my arms flop aimlessly around like deranged thunderbird puppet. Yeah, I'm self conscious and that was before I put on these tights.

I drove, I know I know, to a more secluded country lane. Just cows and sheep for company with small winding tarmac roads through the hills. There's that word, hills. I forgot about hills. First 15 mins were okay, I followed Lauras instructions. I then turned round to head back to the car for the 2nd half. I honestly thought I was going to have a heart attack, it wasn't a very steep hill but I could hardly move my feet at all. The tiniest most pathetic little steps as I attempted to jog up the hill. Eventually I made it back to the car utterly exhausted, covered head to toe in sweat. I downed one of those sports drinks, which made me feel very olympian, and collapased into my car seat.

22 Replies

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  • That blog made me chuckle simply because it sounds so familiar. But well but done and keep going. Im only on week two and still feel like my lungs may burst if i have to run another step, but weirdly it's like Laura can read my mind because just as i get to that point she tells me to slow down. Which is great because that must mean i am lasting longer before i get to lung bursting stage. Anyway keep up the good work i am told by lots of people on here that it does get easier.

  • Excellent blog! Can't wait to hear your progress. Cows and sheep make excellent running company.

  • Love it! Made me smile! And sounds very familiar, have another go, you might suprise yourself....no suggestions for the arms though i'm afraid. Good luck.

  • Hope your feet are OK. I found that spending money on decent running shoes was well worth the investment. And I spent £95 on mine...

    Congratulations on getting started. You may find yourself becoming addicted to running!

  • That made me chuckle too, like some of the others it all sounds very familiar! But you have definately got the worst one out of the way. If you look at some of the blogs on here most find/found W1R1 tough.

    Now take your rest day and get ready to pull on your 'tights' tomorrow ~ I have a feeling you will enjoy R2 :)

  • Great post! With your sense of humour you will fit right in here! Week 1 was by far the worst for me so hang in there. You'll be ready for that torch relay next time the Olympics comes to the UK!! ;-)

  • Know exactly where your coming from I was the same only I have a large chest to add to the mix, keep going though you will love yourself for it. I am about to start week 4 and yes its been hard but if I can do it any one can, dare I say I am even starting to enjoy it. Good luck and keep posting

  • LOL - can just picture the tights :)

    Good luck. Bet it wont be long before you dont mind being seen out running..

  • Next time drive to a flatter course, even if you have to go to Norfolk! Build your stamina up slowly, using the brisk walking parts as an opportunity to swing those arms, then you'll know how to hold them during the runs. And, of course, use your new hoppy as an excuse for a bit of retail therapy and get some trainers :)

  • Love the blog! Well done for keeping going. I remember when I first started thinking 'everyone will look at me' and of course, nobody does.. All you get from other 'proper' runners is smiles of encouragement. A tip about the tights - try underpants over the top and now you've got a costume to go with the superhero status you automatically qualify for when you start C25k!! Keep on going - stick with it and you'll find before long you can't wait to get out there..

  • Thanks for the kind encouragement everyone! I'm now keen to attempt Run 2 tomorrow. Definitely somewhere flat this time and I'll surely fly along.

  • So funny, can't wait for your next blog. Well done you for getting out there. Your journey has begun....

  • Hilarious

  • Loving the name! Good luck . . . it does get easier, promise (50 yrs old, ex 40 a day)

  • Hope it gets easier! Struggled on run 2 today. Looking forward to being able to enjoy it a little more and not being so very out of breath and so very drenched in sweat.

  • Loved it! You made me laugh - please keep going, and please keep blogging! Believe me, it may not seem so right now, but it does get easier. I am looking forward to hearing all your exploits!

  • This made me laugh out loud!! I sympathise with the hill issue but it will get easier. Let us know how you get on with the next run

  • Cheers! Run 2 done and blogged. Didn't fare much better I'm afraid despite lovely flat road this time.

  • Believe it or not, we all felt the same way at the beginning... not all as blessed with the ability to express it though! Well done for starting, you are in for a fun ride.

  • Well done steve. It can only get better, right? That's my philosophy. Week 1, run 3 tomorrow for me. I can hardly wait! Who'd have thought it? Not me, for sure.

  • I have only ever run without driving first once and that was when it was snowing too much to take the car out.

    In fact come to think of it that would be another goal, getting good enough to contemplate starting out from home up the hill from hell...

  • Hi steve...I have only just read your introducing blog but it honestly made me LOL!!! You are doing so well to get out there and you should be proud of yourself. I completed w1r2 yesterday and found that really hard going but we will all get there eventually. I am gonna watch your blogs religiously because they cheer me up no end. Good luck...

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