PERSPECTIVE?

IF MANS BEEN AROUND FOR A MILLION YEARS, AND WE LIVE TO ONE HUNDRED, WE WILL EXIST FOR......0.0001% OF MANS TIME ON EARTH.....SMILE THE PRESSURES OFF!!!! NOTHING CAN BE THAT SERIOUS.........WE ARE NOT THAT IMPORTANT, WE ARE A GLITCH IN TIME..........WE ARE IMPORTANT TO OURSELVES AND FAMILY AND FRIENDS....BUT TO BE SAD ALSO AFFECTS THEM. ----MAKE EVERYONE, INCLUDING YOURSELF HAPPY...........

REMEMBER YOUR LIFE WAS A GIFT FROM GOD, HE WOULDN,T WANT YOU TO WASTE IT.

YES WE MAY BE UNWELL AT THE MOMENT BUT THAT IT ONLY "AT THE MOMENT"......IT DOES NOT HAVE TO BE FOREVER......

NEGATIVITY IS A FRAME OF MIND,A HABIT!!!!....IF YOU GO INTO THE WOODS LOOKING FOR MUSHROOMS, THEN THAT IS ALL YOU WILL NOTICE.........OPEN YOUR EYES TO THE BEAUTY THAT SURROUNDS YOU AND YOU WILL TRAIN YOUR MIND TO NOTICE THE GOOD THINGS...........HAVE GRATITUDE FOR LIFE, EVEN SOMETIMES IF ITS NOT WHAT YOU THINK IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN............LIFE IS LIFE, IT JUST IS!....IT WAS NEVER IN GODS PLAN TO MAKE IT GO ALL OUR WAY................LOVEX

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  • Hi Stde I do appreciate everything around me and I am aware of everything you have said my friend,its just that when you are constantly feeling light headed and have your friend anxiety with you 24/7 its difficult not to concentrate on how you are feeling,I still go out every day,especially Tesco's as I just float round there,(smile) and I still love my gardening even though I feel light headed,I do appreciate that anxiety is bad habit and that I have had my friend anxiety with me for about 20/30 years,but thank you for your post it is appreciated my friend,its just that I get very frustrated with the way I let(yes I let) anxiety bother me so much.Have a good day

  • Your right, like you I suffered for 30yrs, I know this does not work for everyone, but I just got so sick of being sick that the only thing that helped me (maybe I was ready!!!!!). Was to realise that I NEVER REALLY KNEW WHAT LIFE WAS ABOUT.......NOBODY HAD MADE ME FACE THE TRUTH.....IT OWED ME NOTHING...... ,I lived with fear, I had high expectations,I was a perfectionist, and egotistical!!!!.........then when I looked at all these traits, I realised that they were not making me happy, so I work hard on a daily basis to let them go!...........I wish you peace.....x

  • Hi Stde, I understand where you are coming from. I am trying the same kind of 'technique' at the moment. I decided I was sick of feeling, down, being anxious, letting stuff get in the way of my enjoyment of life. I keep telling myself, only I can help myself, only I can make the change. I do believe we can retrain our minds, we get trapped in our entrenched thinking. it doesn't always work, isn't always easy. The symptoms are still there but I do my best to ignore them and try and get on with the day. Not a quick fix and I have to practice every day but it is enabling me to manage and live the life that I want at the moment.

  • Hi! Caz, fortunately it is people like you who have a great chance of changing and becoming well..........

    Try to look upon negative emotions as visitors, not part of your true good self, they will pass.

    Try to see your problems as flotsam drifting down a river, Become the observer, watch life rather than getting to involved in things that do not concern us.

    Believe that inside you there is a guiding spirit, that good will happen, as it does but we just don,t notice.

    Thank each day, whether good or bad, for your existence and gain gratitude.....

    There is a time for the poor me,s.........but that time is limited, if we don,t move away from this we become "wallowers"

    There is people here who are in terrible situations, but easier said than done, if you can,t change it then you must try daily to pray that you will get strenght and accept the situation.............the other option is to wallow and be miserable..........hard to say, but true...

    God bless them.and you for seeing the way.........xx

  • Well, yeah, fine, I may be just a blip in the universe, but I'm the only blip I have, and if I'm unhappy, I'm an unhappy blip! And - please remember - not everyone on here can/does believe in God, however one may conceive him/her/it, so praying isn't an option for them! Even for those who do, depression etc can get in the way - as an Anglican priest wrote:-

    I've prayed, oh how I've prayed!

    Till I'm worn with all my praying!

    Till I've bored the blessed angels with my battery of prayer!

    It's the right thing to say,

    But it's only saying saying,

    And I cannot get to Jesus for the glory of her hair!

    Many of us could substitute the last line with:-

    "I cannot get to God for the cloud of black despair!"

    Telling people on here who are in despair, who are struggling on a daily basis to get through the next day, the next hour, the next minute, to "think positive" that they "don't really matter" that they're "just a blip" - when many are struggling with low self-esteem to start with - well, I don't think it's helpful! Frankly, invincible optimism can be extremely irritating when you're suffering badly!

    This is one place where people should feel they can be honest, where they can rant, wail or whatever, without worrying their nearest and dearest, or fearing to drive their friends away!

    If we feel rubbish, we should be able to say so, without being told it doesn't matter!

    Rose

  • Well said Rose

    xxx

  • Thank you, Why! xxxx

  • I never said half of the things you quoted............So life is not good, but only you can decide if thats forever.......

    I did expect a response like this, but the truth is life is life........I could not accept life on lifes terms because I did not understand basic life, I thought it always should go my way............my change in understanding made me well again

    I wish this for everyone but there is people who have accepted that this is for life!!! IT DOES NOT NEED TO BE IF THE TRUTH IS FACED......we can change...

    Religion does not come into it GOD ......(GOODNESS) LIES WITHIN US ALL, FIND IT AND YOU ARE ON THE ROAD TO RECOVERY.....

    I write this with truth and compassion not with EGO........I wish everyone could get better.........but there are some who cannot change........I had no choice,life was to short and precious......maybe I trusted when i had nothing left.

  • Well said Stde. You didn't say we don't matter, but 'We are important to ourselves and family and friends'. What is wrong with trying to find the positive in every day? I still struggle, but personally I don't want to stay there and have decided to try my best to do something about it and to try not to wallow. I do find it helpful to read something positive, there has to be a balance.

  • Well, actually, you did, I may have paraphrased some of it, but not, think, distorted any.

    And, you are illogical - you say that :- YOUR LIFE WAS A GIFT FROM GOD, HE WOULDN,T WANT YOU TO WASTE IT. IT WAS NEVER IN GODS PLAN TO MAKE IT GO ALL OUR WAY.

    Yet you also say:-

    WE ARE NOT THAT IMPORTANT, WE ARE A GLITCH IN TIME

    I used the word "blip" - actually, "blip" is less derogatory, as a "glitch" usually means something that gums up the works! But, if "God" has a "plan" for us, then we can't be just a glitch/blip, can we? One does not "plan" a glitch.

    Yet in your reply you say:-

    Religion does not come into it GOD ......(GOODNESS) LIES WITHIN US ALL.

    But in your reply to Kaz you say:-

    you must try daily to pray that you will get strenght

    Pray to whom? Ourselves?

    And, if there IS a God - and you seem confused on this point - of course religion comes into it, because religion is merely our human attempt to to know the divine will and to do it

    But, as I say, not everyone here does/can believe in God - what/whom do they hold on to/pray to?

    You cannot have it both ways - you cannot at one minute say that we are a"glitch" in time, then that God has a plan for us and we should pray for strength, THEN that "Religion does not come into it GOD ....... GOODNESS LIES WITHIN US ALL.

    You either believe in a supreme, supernatural eternal being who has a plan for us, or you don't. If you don't, there's no point "praying for strength" because there's no-one on the other end of the phone! But you shift your ground by saying that "GOD .... GOODNESS LIES WITHIN ALL OF US" - that is a valid theological view, but contradicts your earlier assertions of "God's plan". You can believe one or the other (or, indeed, neither!) but not both at once!

    And you say:- .........WE ARE IMPORTANT TO OURSELVES AND FAMILY AND FRIENDS....BUT TO BE SAD ALSO AFFECTS THEM.

    People with mental health problems feel/are made to feel quite guilty enough, without being told they're making other people unhappy!

    MAKE EVERYONE, INCLUDING YOURSELF HAPPY....

    I'm sure most people who post on this site would LOVE to do so, but not everyone finds it that easy! If it were, this site would not need to exist.

    You say:- "So life is not good, but only you can decide if thats forever....... "

    Did I suggest it was "forever"? No, of course not! But sharing and talking about your pain may well be the best way to ensure that it is NOT forever! That isn't wallowing, it's therapeutic, which is what this site is all about!

    Rose

  • Hi Rose, why spend time picking someone's post to pieces? Know you're an intelligent woman and can probably run rings round all of us, but you don't always have to prove it! Stde posted what he felt, works for him, he is getting on with his life and feeling better. the same as Castel and some others. They are trying to help ... Much the same as you, just that their way may be different to yours. I have spent time wallowing endlessly discussing, and agree with Stde there comes a time to put that to one side. You can't deny they say its working for them. Are you finding what's working for you?

  • Hi Kaz - why spend time picking someone's post to pieces? Because I'm afraid that if new people want to post about how bad they feel, and all they see is posts telling them to "be positive" and not to "wallow" - they'll be put off saying how they really feel, and getting the support this site can offer.

    That's why.

    Thanks for saying I'm intelligent, I wasn't trying to "prove" anything, just challenging a view I personally felt could be unhelpful for a lot of people.

    Cheers

    Rose

  • I never mentioned positive thinking, that's impossible when you are truly unwell (I know ).....but getting gratitude for our meer existence helps.....

    I don,t contradict, I use the word God (the goodness plan that lies within us, we are not born ill, our thoughts make us that way)

    Please don,t take this the wrong way but your answer shows frustration, this is understandable, but my anger,resentment and frustration at life prolonged my illness......... Is the truth unhelpfull?

    Yes pray to yourself, pray to your subconcious (and god if you are a believer), because what you pray for will be listened to by your own inner strength,change is possible..........

    And if you think this is all nonsense, then It has helped me become well again after 40years of struggling, and so I hope others find their own way.

    The message i,m trying to put across is people can get better, this is a very important message,as too often they are made to believe if they suffer from mental problems that they will always be this way.........this is not the truth.....

    I accept your critisism, but please remember some may not agree, but others may be given hope,this was my intention, nothing else.......hope.......xx

  • Hi Rose, believe it or not :)' I do understand your point of view, but for me, I don't think all new people will see are posts telling them to be 'positive', and I personally like to see posts like these because I believe it gives hope and also gives the site some balance. I also think its good to see that some people are finding their way through and are getting better. Im afraid that if all people see is negativity then they will think there is no way through.

    Also, I do feel that 'sometimes' I feel sorry for myself, 'sometimes' I do 'wallow' .... I have also had my days where I haven't wanted to get out of bed, or have done so but sat on the sofa in tears all day. But frankly, I got sick of myself and being that way and decided I would do my best to find ways to make myself feel better, to motivate myself; to try to learn how to change negative thinking; I owe it to myself and to my family. I could continue to blame my childhood, my rough start in life, things that have happened to me, for the rest of my life; or recognise that although these may have contributed, they were not the cause and I could choose to try to change how I thought about things. I do recognise that my anxiety or negativity will affect and upset those who love me and that spurs me on to find a way out of it.

    But yes, we are all different but one thing Im sure we all want is for everyone here to find their own way and go on to live a more balanced, happier life.

  • always there and ready to jump into a disagreement eh....... deary me, not helpful.

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