Personal questions-

[Minnie12]

As you all know I'm deaf and got health anxiety for about 2 months but do get anxious few times since I was a teenage due parents both passed away but not bad as now.

I always worry if my anxiety doesn't get better then my husband might leave me, got enough of my anxiety etc but he reassured me that he will never but what I'm saying will he be able to cope with my anxiety in next 4-5 years?? Got married to him 2 years ago and been together for nearly 6 years. Love him very much but at the moment I seem can't focus on our marriage because I'm quite anxious about my health such as headache- dull werid feelings on right side back of head on & off for 2 weeks and worry what if its brain tumour but my GP reassured me many times that I do not have it, its not painful or banging headache its like something poking with bit of pain on same area on and off- sometime bit headache but not bad but now got ache on right neck- sort of stiff or muscles pulled. Gp won't lie right?

Also sorry if its too much info, I've noticed my sex drive had gone down a bit and don't feel up for it but will let my husband to do all work, I know its not right but better than say no and push him away. Anyone feel like this? I don't want to ruin our marriage with my anxiety?? I love him a lot and we were trying for baby for 18 months but no successful and been refered to fertility gyne last feb and did lots of test included my husband's swimmers (sorry tmi) result was excellent but found out I'm not ovulating and got thin womb lining mean difficult for eggs to implant so been on clomid 4 rounds and didn't work then had hsg to checked my fallption tubes if any blockage but its cleared and no blockage then recently just a week before Xmas had a hysterscopy where they inserted camera in womb to check any scarrings, polyps, fibroids but everything is normal apart from thin lining due no horomonal support so will start letrazole (better fertility drug), supplements & drink lots milk on next period to thicken my lining and help me to ovulating so wasn't on treatments since aug due few cyst come & go on my ovary so my consultant want it to disappear first before put me on letrazole so going for a scan on monday then start treatment on next period but I'm bit scared if anxiety get worse if I become pregnant?? By the way my consultant know I got anxiety and are on waiting list for counselling. He is a understanding & lovely gyne. Give me advices what should I do about pregnancy? It will be our first trying again with monitor since August.

Suppose to see CBT counselling anytime this month but will ring on Monday and find out the date for first session. Please tell me my anxiety will get better and wont ruin my marriage??wont it get worse when become pregnant??

Please reassure me xx

[Minnie12]

Anyone?

[leehow79]

No ur anxiety wont get worst, havin a baby will give u som1 else 2 focus on+ u could well b not gettin caugh wen u r so anxous it generaly happens naturaly. Ive got a bad headache now due 2 my cold, i dont worry about it though, dont seem 2 hav a lot of worries like most people on ere. But i can assure u ur anxiety is definatley causin ur syptoms which is feedin ur anxiety more. u do need 2 try + stop havin these thoughts (i know easier said than done). and dont worry ur husband is definatley not goin 2 leave u, but i hav thought the same thing, plus i hav had a ovarian cyst + suffer wiv terribl hormones, awful migrains, i wonder if its related 2 anxiety/panick?

[leehow79]

P.S i think CBT could b really good 4 u

[BriarRose]

Dear Minnie

Probably not the best person to answer this question, cos never had a baby, but I'll give it a go! Not surprised your anxious, with everything going on about trying for a baby, fertility tests, drugs etc - all quite stressful enough without anything else, so please try to relax and give yourself a break. Your husband loves you, he's said he's never leave you - BELIEVE HIM, he sounds like a fabulous bloke! As for the sex drive - well, I think everyone goes through times like that, tbh, maybe talk to your husband about it, tell him what you like/turns you on - and sometimes (I know your trying to get pregnant) but maybe just holding, touching, exploring each other, without feeling you "must" have full sex - would help you relax and just be intimate and loving with each other? Just a thought, honey.

As for getting pregnant and anxiety - I honestly don't know, but some women positively BLOOM when they're pregnant, and as you so want a baby, you may well be one of them - what some women i know have called the "contented cow" syndrome lol! Try not to "think" yourself into anxiety about being pregnant, hun - think of the nice things - picking clothes, decorating the baby's room, showing him/her off to relatives, and, most of all, that moment when you first hold your baby in your arms, with your lovely husband beside you, and you both know you've come through and have made a beautiful new life between you! THAT'S the most important thing, my sweet! You're gynae sounds lovely too, I'm sure he will take very good care of yu right through the whole process, and your husband will too.

Do keep posting on here, pet, I'm sure there are lots of people with more experience who can give you better advice than I - but you might want to post on some of the pregnancy/mum to be sites too - there are lots of them, and I'm sure you'ld find lots of advice on there too.

All the best, my sweetie, and DO let us know when we can throw a virtual baby party!

Lots of love, and fingers crossed for you! Hope this helps!

Rose

xxxxxxx

[Hidden]

Hi Minnie

Bless you

My husband has put up with me for 20 years ! & still is here !

When some one loves you accept it , when we have anxiety , we feel low & then wonder how any one could love us , but they also see all the good things about us , which we miss as we are to busy with our anxiety , so believe your hubby , keep telling him how you feel , so he knows its not him & things will be fine

Think anxiety does make peoples sex drive go down , even though as you get older I think it dissapears lol but again just let hubby no it isnt him

Dont worry about babies , when it is ment to be it will be , get yourself feeling the best Minnie there is first & everything else will follow , you are in good hands by the sounds of it with your consultant

As for this cold , well i have it , same , banging head . sharp pains going through , blocked ear , my face went numb & things started going through my head to ! but its like this for everyone , its lasting weeks & if it was anything serious , you wouldnt still be posting by now lol thats what i tell myself anyway , even though I was feeling wobbly earlier with my mind

You will get through this Minnie

whywhy x

[Minnie12]

Thank you all ladies!!

I know I should believe my husband but hate to think of bad thoughts! Yes I've gone through a lot no wonder why I'm so anxious and I'm thinking to take my hubby with me to counselling one day so they can explain him about my anxiety so he will understand more. I have just explained him about sex stuff, he understand why because of my anxiety but he does understand why. He knows I love him very much and always give him kiss & cuddles but sex isn't on my mind much now maybe once a week if he's lucky lol!! I'm

Sure things will be back on track once I start my CBT counselling soon!

Thank you all for reassure!! Sending you all hugs!! Xx

[Hidden]

Minnie

That is a brill idea to take hubby to a counselling session with you , if he would come I would take him

Dont worry about once a week lol he sounds a brill hubby & you both love each other that is what holds a marriage together "love "

Things will get back on track Minnie

Hugs back

whywhy x

[Minnie12]

Whywhy... Yes it's what I thought! ?? Thank you again and glad your husband is still with you through years with your anxiety as it proves that your marriage is stronger through hard & good times xx