How long do you keep on fighting for until you give in. I'm not talking on giving up on life or anything drastic like that, just giving up on your ambitions and dreams and reconsidering your life goals?
I have always wanted to carve a career for myself and be successful in my chosen profession. There is no external pressure from family/friends, I have just always wanted the best for myself (I'm a total perfectionist). I moved to London when I left uni as I felt it was the best place to follow my aspirations. I have been in my chosen profession for 5 years now and have a good reputation in the niche industry I work in, but just lately I'm just not handling work pressures very well.
I've always been "a bit of a worrier" but I first realised anxiety was really effecting my life about 6-9 months ago. I changed jobs 2 months ago as I was no longer enjoying my job and thought I needed a change. I stayed in the same industry but moved to a different company. After a positive start the anxiety is creeping up on me again. There is no particular issue with my current place of employment but I constantly have deadlines and responsibilities that are just part of my job and at the moment I am just struggling to cope with it. I feel overwhelmed, I've had a tight feeling in my chest for the past week and I've started crying at night again. I feel lost and feel like I lack direction in my life at the moment.
Where do i go from here? I was hoping the new job could provide a fresh start and a fresh perspective but if anything it has just made me realise how bad my anxiety can effect me at work. Should I admit that I'm not cut out for a high pressured career like and accept this fast paced life isn't good for my health or do I struggle through this rough patch and hope I can overcome this.
Sorry for the long post, but I would really appreciate advice from anyone who has had a similar experience.
Thanks,
HB
Hi Anxious
That's a really interesting - and quite difficult - question - and one which i grappled with a few years ago, although the answer was taken out of my hands. It seems to me that you have - as you so clearly see - two choices; one, stick at your chosen profession if you really love it, and learn to handle the pressure more positively - and that can be done. There are lots of "relaxation" techniques, even assertiveness training - which helps you learn to say "No!" when too much is expected of you. Or, alternatively, decide that the game isn't worth the candle and look for work that will still give you job satisfaction but with less pressure.
Neither course of action is in itself "right" or "wrong" - it really depends on what you want from life? I am wondering - is there anyone in your line of work - not someone who can affect your career, but someone who's "been there, done that" - that you could talk to, who might even agree to "mentor" you? Mentoring is more and more common in business these days, i believe, and it could help? Have a look on here:- horsesmouth.co.uk/
Finally, you could start writing things down - like - what do you want out of life, what do you definitely not want out of life. Similarly, write down the good and the bad of your current line of work - what you enjoy, what you find difficult - and, also, what you would do instead?
I know your blog (which wasn't that long, don't apologise lol!) was mainly about work, but do you have outside interests that really engage you? They can really help with work stress. Or, even simple things - it wouldn't apply to your living in London, but when I had a stressful job, I had two choices for the drive home - the quick, fast, dog-eat-dog dual carriageway, or the slow B Road that meandered through fields and past farms. I usually took the latter, as I just found it helped me "wind down".
You might find this site helps on work-related stress: - nhs.uk/Conditions/stress-an...
Hope this helps, good luck, and do come back and tell us how you're getting on - lots of support on here. Oh, and as one perfectionist to another - sometimes "good enough" really IS good enough!
Love
Rose
xxxx
Thanks Rose,
It's hard to think straight when you have worked yourself up and I really appreciate your advice. As you probably know, remembering why you love your job is difficult when you feel like this.
Your right in saying that my blog focused on work, this is mainly because I feel like it consumes my every thought at the moment and I am finding that engaging in other activities is difficult. I definitely need to make more of an effort on this!
I have at least in my head done some of the things you suggest in your reply. When I was thinking about leaving my old job I did think about other professions I might like to try, but in the end decided to stay in the same profession as I really wanted to see if I could make a go of it in a different working environment.
I think now more than ever I am realising that many of my previous life choices have been based on my reactions to the anxiety I didn't really realise I was suffering from and I now have some serious thinking to do to make sure my next choice is right for me. I will definitely try some of the things you have suggested and update you with any success I have.
Thanks again,
HB x
Damn just wrote a long post and lost it
Will try again in the morning - sorry! xxx
This was more or less what i was trying to describe - badly
- the urgent/important matrix - you might find this helps.
mindtools.com/pages/article...
And Sandra99b's time management tips were brilliant - really good!
And yes, I've been there, so hung up on your job that you forget you have a life as well. Realistically, there ARE times when the job has to come first - ask any police officer investigating a series of murders about his "personal time" and he'll laugh. But it should NOT be the norm - we work to live, not live to work!
Rose
xxxx