Beating yourself up when you are struggling with anxiety and panic.

[moley64]

I have had a very challenging week. My wife had been feeling poorly with angina pains and I took her to the doctors on Tuesday. After some tests he told her that she needed to got to hospital as something might be "brewing". I took her to hospital and she had more tests and was told that an overnight stay was not required. We were both relieved. During this period I coped very well and controlled feelings of anxiety and panic. I felt calm and strong for my wife during this episode. I have looked after my wife over the last few days and been fine.

This morning I felt anxious I as I was starting to feel what I objectively think are perhaps cold/flu symptoms. My anxiety rose to a point where I was earlier this afternoon close to having a panic attack. I was very upset and tearful and kept asking my wife if she loved me. Yet only a few days ago I was able to be a strong supportive husband. When my wife is poorly I am understanding and caring yet I beat myself up when I am struggling. Do any of you go through this experience.

[Hidden]

Yes,moley64. We all have. I will leave you to some very wise people on this site who will be able to help. You are not alone in this. You have become 'sensitised' and need help. It will be forthcoming. Regards. jonathan.

[moley64 in reply to Hidden]

Thanks.

[daisy459]

I can understand where you are coming from. A few weeks ago my other half was knocked off his bike by a hit and run driver. This involved us going to the police station and then the Emergency dept at the hospital that evening and i surprised myself in being able to do both easily as the hospital holds a lot of bad memories for me since my dad died there a few months ago. I felt calm and in control.

The following day and to some extent a lot of the following week, i found my panic came back quite strongly and it was really thanks to Claire Weekes books that i was able to accept that this can happen. There will be setbacks. It strengthens what is true that the panic and anxiety are in our own minds and it is just ourselves that make them go into overdrive and cause the release of adrenaline and make us feel anxious and panicky. When we have something real to deal with, that doesn't give you chance to think about ourselves then the panic doesn't come.

A situation such as yours would test any ones anxiety, not just someone such as you (and me) that is already sensitised to an extent. It is purely because you are that it has gone to another level.

Have you had any counselling?

[moley64 in reply to daisy459]

Thank you for your reply it is most appreciated. I have had counselling but am unsure whether the counselling that I have had has been particularly effective. I do feel that I am in a very sensitized state. There seems to be a number of triggers that I have that make me feel very anxious and panicky. I would like further counselling but am unsure what type would help me the most. I seem to have three things that seem to disturb me in particular. I get very anxious about my relationship with my wife, I have a fear that she will leave me. If I have a cold/flu I get very anxious and panicky. I get very anxious and panicky when I think about visiting my father and step mother or them visiting me.

Is there a particular book by Claire Weekes that you would recommend?

[Hidden in reply to moley64]

Hi. moley. Yes.' Essential help for your Nerves'. My bible. You can get this at Amazon or any good bookshop. It is around £1.

Hope it helps you as it has me. Kind regards. jonathan.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Sorry moley. That should read £10. !!! We should be so lucky!. Regards. jonathan.

[moley64 in reply to Hidden]

thanks