Does anyone worry about how you would cope if a major life event happened to you in the future and its impact on your anxiety?

It's something that is there in my mind as I progressively recover, maybe it's a selfish thought ..but the what if questions are a concern. These can be simple things like how can I cope if we have another child, what if someone close to me passes away.......how would I deal with any one of these and would my anxiety cripple me once more- how would I recover etc., you probably get the gist but if anyone has successfully progressed in their recovery even through out of control events it would be good to hear.

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  • I had a bad end to the week last week. First my petrol tank on my car was drilled leaving me with an empty tank and a bill for a new one. Oh, and no transport. This was on a day that i was supposed to be going back to work after being off for 6 weeks with anxiety/panic disorder. I also had my first CBT appointment to get to!

    I got through it okay with the help of my mother in law and managed to get lifts to the CBT and work the next day.

    Then the following day my partner was knocked off his bike by a hit and run driver on his way home from work. Luckily he walked away with only a broken bone in his wrist and cuts. I say luckily as it could have been a lot worse and he did get their reg and a witness. So relying on lifts again we went to the police and the hospital and now he is in a cast and signed off for 6-8 weeks.

    I hadn't been to the hospital since my dad died there 3 months ago so it was hard.

    I got through it and although it has hindered my progress a bit, i think i was in a good position mind-wise in the week before and was really starting to see results so i am managing better.

    Had this of happened 3 week ago i am sure it would have had quite a lot worse effect as i was struggling to leave the house then.

    It has proved to me that i can cope better than i thought and that i have made real progress. I am finding i have slipped a bit because of it and have had some days lately where i just haven't felt right but i am keeping going. The memories of my dad in the hospital have come back and i am having to deal with them again but i will get through.

    The more you recover, the more you can handle things xx

  • Thanks for your kind words and sorry for the week you've had....you are right that we always find a way to cope but it's just frustrating when you are in the prime of your life with a young family and wife that I'm trying to live day to day. Anyway slowly Some positive thoughts and experiences have creeped back into my life in the last few months and to be honest I'm in a better place now then I was 6monyhs ago ANC I suppose ive coped with stressful situations that I couldn't have predicted. That'd the problem with anxiety- we think too much. Take care and hope you continue to progress well.

  • Hi LVS1. Once you have learned to recover the right way then any future setback can be dealt with using the same set of rules. The last sentence of daisy459's blog says it all. You talk of 'out of control events'. Yes, they mostly are out of our control but it is the way we handle them that is important. By, once again, FACING and ACCEPTING we can regain our composure and deal with the situation. It CAN be done, but it takes TIME and most of us are impatient with time. Anyway, jolly well done and please let us all know how you progress. Best wishes. jonathan.

  • Hi Jonathan, you sound like you've made great progress and are in a good place/ an inspiration perhaps to the rest of us. what worked for you?- was it just about acceptance and truly doing this over time? Looking back how did you feel or see the progression, for me you never quite know when you have a down if its a backward or forward step, the only thing for me is I always do whatever it was I was supposed to do and not avoid. I'm a believer in resilience and know that each and every experience good and bad will take me further forward in accepting and developing a permanent change in my belief system. Anxiety for me thrives on fear and this is mainly due to our processing of thoughts and the bad habits and thinking traps we fall into without knowing so.!My awareness of this has increased significantly and it means the downs although never nice are shorter lived and slowly you learn to see the traps you fall into (usually after the event though!). However it still hard to accept them and we wouldn't be human if we didn't fell disheartened and frustrated by them and then do the dreaded analysis which is hard not to but never beneficial..Anyway thanks for the continued advice and I'm sure I'll continue to post. As a fellow bloke one of my issues Is bottling things up and trying to be strong for the young children and wife- it's added pressure but what can you do- this blog is a good outlet for me as it helps put a perspective on things. Best wishes LVS

  • Well I think this way also! Whenever I'm under alot of stress here comes the monster I wish someone had an answer for me on what to do this time it has lasted about 6 months!!! Now I avoid most stressful situations as much as possible which is not easy, it all started when my mother passed got better, dad passed away got better brother passed away got better sister passed got better husband lost fingers in accident got better husband had heart trouble an daughter is really sick liver failing her so right now I'm in a battle but getting through an better so today I'm suppose to start cutting back on meds which I'm nervous about since I won't take anything because I have phobia of meds but the one I do take is very addicting but yet they gave to me when I was in ER so honestly I know someday I will not struggle with this only by the grace of God an lots of prayers

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