I've had GAD for 2 1/2 years which started out of the blue when i had a panic attack with symptoms to me felt like I was having a heart attack. This episode and for the next 3 months knocked me back as I didn't know what was wrong with me and i was off work. Previously I thought I was indestructible and had a huge capacity for life and work and was the centre of everything. Now I'm on my second period of CBT, not had any meds, made some lifestyle changes, but feel my happiness is impacted by the sheer effort of day to day living and the pressure to be well. I'm making progress and through mostly my own efforts I am much more aware of the condition but it has taken me the best part of the last 12 months to better understand my condition and its still a learning game. Of course the ups and downs happen with downs always making it hard to see that you are making progress. I've been really disappointed by the NHS as I know if somebody had explained to me at the outset what I was going to have to deal with i could have avoided some of the negative habits i formed. it really leaves you in the middle feeling helpless. Anyway as I approach my 40's now with a young family sometimes i feel broken -I know I am making progress and I am in a far better place but i feel insecure about the future and feel that life is passing me by. although I'm not waiting to simply get better I can't help to make the comparison to how I was to how I am now and then worry about how I will deal with anything major that happens in my life. I am persistent and resilient but even for me this is a major challenge which really affects my happiness- would be good to hear people's experiences on how they remain positive and happy and enjoy life...
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