For a while I have been feeling really down and didn't think I would ever get back to my normal self. Everybody on here has been so supportive and sent lovely messages. It really made me smile to receive them
Recently I've been making changes to how I go about things. I had a good heart to heart with my partner as I knew it was effecting our relationship. We barely spoke, I was snappy and just wanted to go to bed all of the time. Whilst he was worried about how I felt, we both agreed that because it was a frame of mind, I should make positive changes to try and influence how I feel. I've started eating a better diet, I have cut out alcohol and rarely touch caffeine. My partner allows me to have my own space when I need it and I go to bed a bit earlier now as tiredness played a big part in my moods.
I've also adopted some 'life rules' from the book I am reading (The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin) I've been preaching about this book recently but it is such an uplifting read and sometimes I feel like I am reading about myself. The rules I am using at the moment are 'Act how you want to feel' and the '1 minute rule'.
This morning I woke up at 6:00am to walk our dog, same as every morning. It was pouring down with rain and I was tired, so I wasn't in the best of moods. Usually I will start the walk feeling really tight chested because I'm wound up I have such a busy day ahead of me, but taking the tip from Gretchens book, I thought no, I want to feel happy. I enjoy walking the dog, don't taint the rest of the day. So I got up, smiled and 'acted how I wanted to feel' I got through my walk fine and felt better that I hadn't nagged at my boyfriend all morning as that usually makes me feel worse!
The 1 minute rule was such a small, simple change to make, but has made a huge difference. I usually get in from work, plop myself on the couch and think about how much I have to do and how I don't want to do it. In turn, I get myself frustrated and annoyed and it ruins my day further. Now, when I think that I have to do something, I just do it. I feel so much better that I clear things out as the day goes by and I'm not left with a list spiralling out of control. It's also given me confidence in myself again that I'm not useless
I really hope I can keep this up but at the moment I feel like I am making good progress.