I have a history of anxiety and depression. Sometimes my anxiety is focused on health anxiety, but sometimes it's my 'comparing' obsession where I compare myself unfavourably to other people and feel inadequate, envious, resentful and panicky and it's horrible because I also feel terribly guilty about feeling as I do. It also makes me compare my relationship with my husband of 39 years to those of friends and family and when I see other couples doing things differently, being happy with each other etc I obsess that our relationship isn't working and feel terrible panic and lose faith in my ability to love. Because I am very anxious and have a diagnosis of Borderline PD, I find criticism of any kind hard to take and am rather high maintenance.I wish I could be different and I find myself feeling totally hopeless that anything will ever change. I fixate and obsess about anything that sparks my anxiety - if my brother sends an email saying he and his wife have been somewhere I will obsess about that because we haven't been there! I can see it's ridiculous but I can't do anything to stop it and the panic and anxiety goes on. Anyone relate to this?
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