I HATE the odd things I have anxiety about

[DemureRose]

I think I’ve posted about this before but I have this insane anxiety about getting gas.

If you ask me why I’m anxious about it, I couldn’t tell you. It’s been almost four years I’ve had my license and I’ve had trouble getting gas ever since with no explanation on why.

I know how to get gas. It’s gone without a hitch every time I’ve gotten it.

But for some reason, every time I get to the point where I need gas…I panic.

I have to psych myself up just to get gas and sometimes I have to wait until I have a day with nothing to do because I’m so exhausted afterwards from the effort.

It’s ridiculous.

And this isn’t the only thing I’ve had this reaction to, but I’m able to get over most things pretty quickly. I think the reason this sticks around is because even when I do it and I feel confident, I have about two weeks before I need it again and by that point all confidence is gone.

I feel like if I had to do it everyday, I’d probably gotten over it within a few weeks.

But like right now, I desperately need gas. I’ve needed gas for about two days now, but today reached dire situation. And I’m home for the weekend so I’m considering just asking my dad to get it for me.

He never minds but I just feel so awful about myself. I mean I’m almost 20 years old and I can’t get my own gas? What the heck?

And I was all ready to get myself gas. I got in my car, drove to the gas station but when I got there…every pump was full. Logically I know, you pull in and wait for one to free up. But that was all I needed for me to lose that psych up I had gotten.

It’s not even the getting the gas that’s the hardest part. It’s the psych up I have to give myself beforehand. I need a good 1-2 hours just to psych myself up.

It’s the most irritating thing about my anxiety. And it’s one of the few things that makes me feel really upset with myself about it.

[b1b1b1]

This sounds a bit like a phobia to me. Usually exposure therapy helps with phobias. The only thing I can think of is to just get gas as often as possible until it no longer bothers you. It might also be worthwhile to talk to a psychiatrist about this, as they might have some better ideas, and also can help you explore how this fear came about.

[Damian]

I think anxiety tends to focus on weird things. If it focused on things that it makes sense to worry about, it would just be rational concern for your safety. You might for example feel worried about standing close to the edge of a cliff, but that's just good sense. The worry is there for a good reason, to stop you putting yourself in danger.

I've worried about all sorts of things. Some of them are real but exaggerated, like finding a bump on my skin and worrying that it's cancer. Other things make no sense at all, like for a while I was worrying that I'd go to bed and leave a cushion in a place where it would fall down. It would then land on something electrical, and start a fire during the night. I suppose technically a fire could start like that, but it's so so so unlikely that it makes no sense.

With your worry, though, I was wondering—do you think it might be that it's such an adult thing, getting gas? Are you worried about managing on your own as an adult? (Most people your age probably are, I certainly was.) If so, is it possible that it's finding an outlet in something that's so symbolic of growing up, having your own car?

I had a motorbike licence before a car licence, but I remember it feeling like a big event getting petrol for the first time. I didn't get anxious about it, but it felt like a milestone I suppose.

[Rosa2019]

I hate getting gas too. I drive over an hour so I can have an attendant pump my gas in New Jersey. You pull up open your gas door snd they fill it up and it’s no problem. I think pumping gas yourself is horrible. I don’t think you have a phobia at all.