I want to give up

Right now I just feel like crying my boyfriend is not understand that I need to move out to sort my life out I can't keep living on 50 quid every 2 weeks. Now he is saying i don't give a fuck or think about him now a days. I said we can still be together just not live together also he does weed and drinks everyday when he gets mad he breaks things this is not good for my mental health . i feel not good right now just feel like crying he is saying money is more important than are relationship only because i want to stop struggling and not keep living on 50 every 2 week like i have for the past 3 years i have all ways puted this relationship first but i need to put me first now but he makes me feel some how I am in the wrong for wanting to get my own place. I am struggling with money i have a chance to not struggle. I am so sad i feel like i can't do it anymore it hurts so bad I am getting suicidal thoughts i just what to get my life sorted so i can get my kids back on day i want to be happy. Right now i feel like giving up and stop this hurt 😢. I am only 27 i got so much to live for i got 3 amazing kids i want my life back .

[Secret4706]

As selfish as it sounds you need to put yourself first and do what's right for you and your kids hun x

[Hidden in reply to Secret4706]

I all ways putted the relationship first all ways trying to make it work but now that i don't do that he does not like it . i am at my mums and i know when i go back i got hell to pay he will start on me for hours. I been to the bathroom to cry and i felt so much hurt. I got a chance to change my life around and i am going to take it.

[Secret4706 in reply to Hidden]

Don't go back if you feel like that. Try and find a hostel or somewhere else safe to stay. You take that chance. Look after yourself and stay safe.

[Hidden in reply to Secret4706]

I am staying at my mums and i am going to get my stuff tomorrow

[Secret4706 in reply to Hidden]

So glad you are somewhere safex

[TheBlackdog]

Dont go back. Things wont change. Take this opportunity now. Get yourself help. It sounds like you need it more. If he really loves he will understand x

[Hidden in reply to TheBlackdog]

I am staying at my mums tonight and I'm going to get my stuff tomorrow i can't lose my only chance to start getting my life back

[TheBlackdog in reply to Hidden]

Well done you stick with a decision. Go for it get a better life. Obvs I have no idea who you are but to me your situation cannot go on much longer or you will be the one who is really poorly. While you still have that extra bit of fight left in you your world is your oyster. You should be happy and come first. It's one life you have and you must live and love it.

I have just been diagnosed with Migraine's. I doubt this a little because I have had them for so many years now without treatment. I have suffered for so long. Now I am getting the help I need and getting answers. It's never too late to turn your life around. Remember you are the only one who can be in control of your destiny.....it sounds like you are ready for the next stage in your life x

[Hidden in reply to TheBlackdog]

I am ready but I am scared

[TheBlackdog in reply to Hidden]

Scared of? Change, repercussions? Your partners reaction?

[Hidden in reply to TheBlackdog]

Of my bf he gets so angry

[TheBlackdog in reply to Hidden]

But if he loves you he needs to wait for you to sort yourself out first?

[Agora1]

Dearest glitterangel, there is only one answer and that is to make that change for yourself. You've worked so hard in getting back on the right path. Your young, your children need their mom. The time is right for you to take that step forward or you will forever stay stuck in that cycle of fear.

Giving up is not an option. I know what you are capable of doing. You are a strong young woman who more than deserves her life back. You know I'm always here for you xx

[Hidden in reply to Agora1]

Thank you it took me years for me to see that I am strong but sometime i feel weak i work hard to get my mental health better but my life situation has affected it. My relationship has never been a good one i ask my self now what did i see in him. He putted me throw so much pain he made me more unhappy than happy he made me cry more than putting a smile on my face and when i really needed him to help me to be there for me he was not. But i was all ways there for him all ways helping him all ways giving him chances it will be 10 years next month i have been with him. Now i need this change i need to get my own benefits until i can get a job he gets mad . this was never a healthy relationship i see it more as a toxic one .

[Agora1 in reply to Hidden]

glitterangel, your eyes have been open now, the time is right for you to move on xx

[Hidden]

Hello

You are young and it sounds like this boyfriend has his own issues and is not right for you at this moment

He is controlling you by saying all these things , it is ridiculous been given 50 pounds every 2 weeks someone else I think is taking the rest , a claim on your own you would be on a lot more

You do deserve better and I hope you find the strength to move out

If we stay in something that is not right it will always be the same , you have the strength to get out and realise things can be different

Take Care x

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

All of this is not helping my head for days i have a lot on my head . he scares me when he gets angry

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

I am so sorry to hear this

You need to speak to someone , Social Services , a women's shelter , get the numbers of Google and please get out of there , you deserve more x

[TheatreOvTragedy]

Please leave. You are so smart and seem like a very decent young lady. You have your whole life ahead of you as well as protecting your kids and giving them a healthy happy stable environment. He seems really toxic and he's emotionally manipulating you. You're being abused from what I read too.

Speak to family and trusted friends. Make up a plan and dont tell him you're leaving. Make sure you have somewhere to go and the kids are safe. Please also arrange care for any pets involved.

This is a big scary step but it's the best step you're ever going to take. Happiness awaits you!!

[Hidden in reply to TheatreOvTragedy]

It took me some time but I am starting to think he is manipulating me even my mum says he is manipulating me i tell my mum a lot but not everything she is all ready worried about me i don't want to add more there is some things i am keeping to myself